Cullen Wife Swap
by BMC1984
Summary: What happens when Emmett and Jasper sign the Cullen's up for wife swap. How will Esme deal with being with a new family? How will the Cullen's deal with a Human living in the house? Post Breaking Dawn Includes Nessie, Jacob, Edward Bella, normal pairings.
1. You did what?

A/N: I got this idea from just randomly watching wife swap,

EsPOV

"Esme, I brought the mail in for you. It seems there is a little more than normal." I heard Alice chime as she walked into the living room. I began thumbing through the mail praying that none of the kids, particularly Emmett were in trouble with school.

Everything seemed to be normal, bills and junk mail; except one large manila envelope. I flipped it over to read the return address.

RDF Media

100 6th Avenue, 3rd Floor, Suite 3-29

New York, NY 10013

I glanced at the return address trying to remember if this was a company that we had ever done any business with. It was addressed to Dr. Carlisle Cullen. I have never opened Carlisle's mail and while I had no intentions of starting I was curious.

I looked at the clock; it was three thirty, there was still a few hours till he came home from work. I placed the letter on the counter and went back to my book.

I was just finishing my book as I heard Carlisle's car pull up the drive. I picked up the letter and rushed to the door to meet him.

"Hi honey, I'm home." Carlisle smiled as he entered the door and kissed me on the cheek.

"What are we the damn Cleavers?" I heard Emmett laughing from the living room.

I laughed about his little comment and quickly returned my thoughts back to the letter in my hand.

"I have no idea what it could be about." He said as he opened it. I saw him glance down scanning over the pages. His fists began to crumple the paper as his face turned even paler.

"Family meeting! Now!" He screamed louder than I had ever heard.

I glanced over to the living room as Emmett was sneaking away.

"SIT" I demanded as he looked guiltily at me.

BPOV

I heard Carlisle's normally gentle voice echo through the house; I glanced over at Edward.

"His mind is to scattered right now to read." He explained knowing that I was looking to him for an explanation.

"I've never heard him yell like that." I said quietly as we made our way out of our room.

"There have been times, usually when Emmett and Jasper are up to…" He paused for a second. "Oh shit, they didn't" He whispered as we made our way down stairs.

"Didn't what?" I whispered, but Edward was currently too busy concentrating on other thoughts.

EmPOV

Fuck, I thought to myself, I am defiantly screwed here. How did he find out? The film crew wasn't supposed to be coming until Monday. Rose entered the room and smiled. "I told you so." She whispered as she purposefully sat at the opposite side of the room as me.

"I thought you were together with me on this." I said unable to believe that my wife was backing out on me.

"No, I said I would not tell anyone. Not that I was going to support you. Your on your own on this one." She smiled smugly.

"Stop talking." Esme angrily hushed us. By the tone of her voice she had obviously found out what this was about.

I watched as the rest of the family filed into the room. Jake and Nessie were first to arrive; obviously neither of them had done anything wrong lately so they had nothing to fear as they entered the room. Edward and Bella appeared next I looked over to Edward, by the look on his face he knew. He let out a low growl as he walked past me. At least he hadn't told Bella; I could tell by the look on her face that she was still clueless. Alice and Jasper were the last to arrive; were they going to bail on me too? We wouldn't have followed through with this if she hadn't seen that everything would work out. I mean what's the use of having a psychic sister if you can't have fun with it.

CPOV

I looked around at the faces of all my children trying to imagine which one of them would have done this. Certainly not my sweet Renesmee, Jake was out of question to he knew not to push Edwards buttons. It wasn't something either Edward or Bella would be involved in; if it didn't involve a bed lately they were uninterested. Alice had to have seen this coming, why didn't she stop it, was she involved. I knew Emmett was involved, but who else.

"I received a letter today." I announced watching their expressions. "I am going to read it in it's entirety before anyone says anything."

Dear Dr. Cullen,

Thank you again for your video entry for wife swap. We find your family very interesting and feel would make for good entertainment. Hopefully you and your family will be able to take something positive from this experience; as well as share your lifestyle with another family. Enclosed we have sent the release forms to be filled out when our crew arrives. In the other packet we have sent the confirmation tickets for Esme Cullen's plane tickets. A company limo will be arriving at your house six hours before the departure time; Sunday April 25th at 11 am. If you have any further questions please feel free to contact us.

I stopped there, "I think I have a few questions, should I contact these people or would you guys like to explain to me what the hell is going on here."

"Carlisle, Alice didn't see anything going wrong, I mean nobody is going to suspect us of anything." I looked over to Emmett stammering to defend himself.

Thump

I ran quickly over to Edward who was now on top of Emmett.

"How could you do this." He snarled as I pulled him off of Emmett. "What do we do if the new mom figures us out?" He asked me as I pulled him back to Bella trying to calm him down.

"Edward, man, don't worry about it, we blend in at school all the time." Emmett broke in.

"Emmett, don't you think that humans find us a little different? They might not come out and say it? This is different than a few hours at school, this is camera's following us around twenty four seven." Esme reminded him. "Twenty four seven, Emmett, do you think America would find it appropriate for you to have sex with her sister?" I watched Esme smile knowing he hadn't taken that into account.

"Who made the tape?" I asked hoping for a quick answer so I wouldn't have to pry it out of them.

I watched as Jasper and Emmett slowly lifted their hands.

"Go get it now. I want to see it." I hadn't even finished when they both took off heading upstairs.

Rose quickly got up and set up the DVD player. I couldn't help but notice that she had been smiling a little too much. She knew and was enjoying watching Emmett squirm.

The boys headed back down I think Jasper's hands were actually shaking when he hit play.


	2. The Tape

A/N: Okay Sorry this chapter is short. This is simply the tape that they submitted for the show. Read, review, and enjoy. Oh and BTW I still haven't found a way to own Edward or the other characters so rights still belong to Stephanie Meyer.

THE TAPE

"Hi, I'm Carlisle Cullen." A voice from behind the camera said. It was a rather good imitation but it was still obvious that it was Jasper.

"I am thirty three years old and married to my wonderful wife Esme for the past thirteen years. My wife found out at a young age that she would be unable to have children so we decided to adopt. As much as we love children we decided that there were many older children in need of homes."

The camera rotated around to show the living room and entrance to the kitchen. We were given a tour of the downstairs of the house as he continued to talk.

"Most of our children were deemed by others as difficult or troubled.""I'll introduce you first to one of the newer members of our family; as well as my first son. Edward was the first to join the family after his parents passed away. At the time he also was very sick as a doctor I took him in and helped him with the healing process. At first he was very moody and tended to stick to himself. Bella was the second to last to join the family a few years ago; she came to us with some suicide issues. The two of them seemed to bond instantly and are now inseparable."

The camera ascended up the stairs as it entered Edward and Bella's room. Music poured out of the speakers; the scene showed Edward and Bella lying in bed, Bella absorbed in a book while Edwards fingers danced with the music across her thigh.

The scene cut to the next room, Rosalie sat in a large chair playing on her laptop, Emmett sat on the floor his head resting by her knee flipping through a magazine.

"This is Emmett and Rosalie." Jasper said in Carlisle's voice maintaining character.

"Hi" Emmett grinned at the camera waving his hand back and forth at unhuman speed. "Rose, aren't you going to say hi?" Emmett asked her trying not to laugh.

"Whatever" was her only reply as she went back to her laptop.

The camera went back out into the hallway.

"Emmett is well, special. It may not be the politically correct term but I don't think there is a term to describe him. Rose was the second we adopted into our family, since she came to us she has been at times bitter and vain, but deep down she has a soft spot…I think." Jasper chuckled.

"I heard that." Rose snarled from the bedroom.

"Did I mention she has a slight attitude problem also?" Jasper said quietly.

The picture fades and we are back in the kitchen. Alice is on camera while she chops up some vegetables.

"This is my wonderful daughter Alice she is Edward's biological sister. She had a hard life before coming to us after being placed in a mental institution; however with the death of her parents I took her and her brother in. It was quickly obvious that she did not need to be institutionalized she just needed someone to love and nurture her. Alice is very gifted."

The camera zoomed into Alice smiling at the camera as she chopped up some vegetables.

"Did I mention we are all vegetarians." Jasper said as Alice giggled at the inside joke. "Well all of us except Jacob. Jake's not really family; we didn't adopt him, he kind of adopted us when he met Renesmee. Speaking of those two what are they up to?"

"They're outside in the garden with Esme." Alice motioned out the kitchen window.

"Well then, I guess I will take you on a tour of the yard." Jasper said as the camera headed out the door winding it's way around the path to the garden in the back yard.

"Renesmee is the newest and youngest addition to the family. Her mother died during child birth and her father was too upset to care for her at the time, she bounced around between aunts and uncles until she joined the family two years ago."

The camera showed Jake and Nessie sitting on a swing in the center of the garden, Esme on her knees pulling weeds.

"Hi guys" Jasper said as they both looked up to the camera.

"What's wrong with your voice?" Esme asked walking towards him.

The camera cut off.

When the screen came back on it was in Carlisle's study. Again we heard Jasper "We'll that's the Cullen's; most of us anyway. I have another son Jasper who is out camping this weekend. He tends to get overwhelmed by some of the drama in the house and escapes for a few days. I am sure you will get to meet him if we are chosen. I hope you are interested in our family. We are and hoping for a thrilling new journey."


	3. Rule Number One: No Sex

A/N: Thanks for reading…Nothing has changed, I don't own anything…Read, Review, Enjoy. J

JPOV

_Oh shit…_

"They are coming tomorrow?" I looked to Alice wondering why she hadn't said anything. Did she not see this coming?

"Oh Jazz, sorry I forgot to tell you." My sweet angel gave me a cynical smile. "Emmett got a email a few weeks ago telling us. You know I hate keeping things from you but Emmett made an offer too good to refuse."

"See this is why the four of you can't do things like this. The four of you can't work together without trying to turn against one another." Esme said scolding us.

"So do you think we should work on our story, like who we are and everything." Nessie said, she almost looked excited to be doing this. Poor girl, I couldn't blame her we have sort of had to keep her hidden since she is still growing.

'Renesmee Carlie Cullen! We are not going to do this!" Bella scolded her.

"Hold on a second." Carlisle said standing up and turning to us. Deep down Carlisle enjoyed a good prank as much as the rest of us guys. "Esme, do you think you could handle living with some humans for a week?" I caught him give her a little wink.

The look of horror vanished off her face and she smiled back at him and nodded.

"Don't worry love you will have a much easier time than these four." he said motioning to us.

"Carlisle, just for the record I wanted nothing to do with this. I don't want some Damn human coming in here telling me what to do. I am probably old enough to be this bitch's grandmother."

"You knew and didn't say anything, makes you just as guilty." Emmett said sticking his tongue out at her. I felt Rose's rage and tried to calm her, no luck her hand moved quickly as it slapped him across the face.

"That's okay, I like it rough." I felt the Emmett and his lustful emotions.

"Emmett, seriously?" I asked staring at him and Rose.

"I think this would be an appropriate subject to tackle right now." Carlisle interrupted us. "For the two weeks that the new mom is here there will be no sex." I looked over at Alice, just the thought of not having sex with her made me want to take her right here right now. By the way everyone else's emotions felt they agreed.

I glanced around the room as everyone looked at each other in shock.

"You know what, I think this will actually be a good thing for me." Jake said smiling. I growled at him, as did Emmett and Edward. Of course he would think it was a good thing, poor guy was almost twenty and still a virgin. Hmmm… could be worse could be a hundred and still a virgin I thought in Edwards direction. He didn't have to say anything I felt his anger towards me.

"I agree," Carlisle said sitting back down with Esme. "If I can't have sex with my wife neither can you guys."

"Carlisle that's not fair!" Emmett said

"What do you mean I am not being fair? All of you with the exception of Nessie and Jake are supposedly high school students. Also, while you may be adopted people see you as brothers and sisters, what would people think if they knew you were having sex each other. Not to mention the fact that I would allow it. Do we want to move again this soon?"

"Carlisle, we aren't exactly normal are we?" I said wondering how I got myself into this.

"Jazz, don't worry man, we still have to go to school." Emmett smiled as he kissed Rosalie's neck.

"True." Edward said obviously thinking of our hidden spots around the school to skip off during classes. It was the first time I had seen him smile since being told of the TV show.

"You guys are pathetic." Nessie said, quickly followed by "Sorry momma."

Poor Nessie, I hadn't even taken into account the way this was making her feel. She was almost three yet looked like a ten year old. We were embarrassing her, I easily calmed her, as if she were waiting for me to do so.

She was starting to have feelings for Jake, nothing bad yet, just coming to terms with the fact that their relationship would be changing. If it was hard on her, it was even more difficult for Jake. He really did love her still as a friend or sister, but it was getting harder for him to deny how quickly she was growing.

"I have to agree with Ness here." Carlisle said looking at us like a group of crazy sex addicts.

"We need to set up some ground rules as well as figure out how we are going to act."

Carlisle said as he began to give us his new rules for the house.

"Number one: No sex, not here, not at school, in the woods, in your cars. NO SEX. Number two: You can't be sleeping with your spouse in the same bedroom. Bella and Alice you two will share Alice's room. Rose, you and Nessie in her room. Emmett you stay in your room; Jasper and Edward in Edwards room. Jake, since I can't allow my ten year old daughter's older male friend to stay in the house your going to have to camp out for a few weeks."

"Ha, it's the doghouse for you mutt." Rose interrupted Carlisle.

"Rule number three: Everyone on their best behavior. I shouldn't have to say this because I know you are all polite and were raised to use good manors. No pranks, no jokes, you will stay in these rooms at night when you are supposed to be sleeping. Rule number four: We need them to see us eating. Get rid of the food on your plates. We should only have to eat dinner together so figure it out. If you have to eat it just gulp it down."

"Carlisle, I have an idea." Bella interrupted. "I'll take care of dinner." We looked at her, awaiting an explanation. 'Don't ask now, wait till dinner, you'll see."

"What about me?" Nessie asked looking towards Carlisle. "You are seven. That way if in six months we can just say you have an exaggerated case of Werner Syndrome."

"What?" Bella asked.

"The disease Robin Williams supposedly had in the movie Jack. Not quite factual but people tend to believe what they want to believe. Coming from a doctor they would probably believe him." Edward explained to Bella

"Right," Carlisle continued. "Since Ness isn't in high school yet we can just use the excuse that we home school until high school."

"Carlisle, we need to come up with what Esme does too." I reminded him. She need's to write down her daily schedule. Besides home schooling, she has to have something to do.

"We should make the new mom clean the house top to bottom every day." Emmett said laughing probably coming up with more ways to torture the new mom.

"I do clean everyday thank you." Esme said feeling unappreciated.

"We can worry about that later, I am going to take Esme hunting tonight we will be back in the morning." Carlisle said as he and Esme began to walk out the door.

"You guys, move the bedrooms around to look like they should, there are two broken beds in the basement, bring them up, they will have to work for now." Esme said playing mom to us one last time before she left in the morning.

"See Bella, it's a good thing we had to buy a couple new beds this year." Edward said kissing her on the forehead.

"Let's just get this stuff moved so we can have some alone time before the new mommy comes." I said


	4. Esme's departure

**A/N: Okay this is another short chapter, trying to get to the ideas of the new mom. Thanks for reading and reviewing, hope you keep enjoying.**

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EsPOV

"I hate to say it but I think we should head back." I said looking over to Carlisle. "The drive is going to take us an hour and we had better make sure the house is still in one piece. I'm sure we weren't the only one's that were busy last night."

We made our way out of the hotel and to the car. The car ride home was silent, I may not be able to cry but talking about how much I was going to miss him would turn me into an emotional train wreck.

It was seven a.m when we arrived home, to my surprise no damage was done.

"You shouldn't have left them alone," Nessie said running up to me to give me a hug. "I got woken up at six when Uncle Emmett broke the bed.""Not fair Ness," Emmett said running into the room behind her. "It was one that your mom and dad already broke. You don't want me going into their sex lives do you?" "Gross," Nessie said heading out of the room trying not to think of her parents like that.

"I'll fix it Es…mom." Emmett said. "Even though it was our little Eddie that broke it in the first place. I guess we can't blame him for getting a little excited with Bella after you know…not for so long."

"That reminds me we need to talk again before the crew gets here." Carlisle said grabbing my hand.

Once everyone made their way down to the living room I listened as Carlisle went over the rules again.

"Make sure you call Esme mom, be polite, no jokes, no sex, all the things normal siblings would do." Carlisle reminded them.

I looked around at my family; I had never been apart from Carlisle for more than a day. Rosalie and Emmett were a little easier to part; their frequent honeymoons took them away from me for weeks at a time. While Alice and Jasper didn't take frequent honeymoons they did leave for weeks at a time to have some time away together. Nessie was growing so quickly I hoped that it wouldn't be noticeable in the two weeks the cameras were here, I had never been apart from here and was saddened by the fact I could miss things in her life. Then there was Edward; I looked over to Edward, my first "son". I missed him terribly when he left Carlisle and I, and for so many years since he returned he was always there. Not having a spouse for so many years like the others made me closer to him. He truly was the son that I lost. Things didn't change much when he brought Bella into our family, she immediately became a daughter to me.

"It's only two weeks mom." Edward said. I smiled realizing he was listening to my thoughts. I quickly got up and embraced him in a hug.

"I love you guys, each and everyone of you." I said quickly making sure not to be seen playing favorites.

The camera crew arrived and everything happened so quickly. They rushed in ready to start filming.

I had to stop myself from laughing when one of the assistants said normally they put everyone through makeup but he couldn't find a flaw on any of our faces. I shrugged it off as our diet and active lifestyle.

They got our release forms and made sure all the paperwork was finished. They filmed for a few minutes me showing them my everyday activities which went by rather quickly since all I was supposed to do was home school Nessie, they got a few shots of me cleaning and gardening.

I couldn't get over how weird everything felt, to have my life documented like this. I was glad I said my real good bye's earlier. I said my on air good bye's which was just as hard as it was earlier.

Before we left another assistant assured Carlisle that his new wife would be here in a few hours. Just act normal, he said as I said a silent prayer that they wouldn't act normal.

I kissed Carlisle goodbye and got into my limo waving to the rest of the family as it pulled out of the drive.

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**A/N: One more thing, for all of you who have read and supported A New Addition I can't get story ideas for the pups out of my head so look forward to a new story shortly. I'm thinking jumping to their first birthday.**


	5. New mom's POV

A/N: Okay i still don't own anything, read, review and most of all enjoy. Next chapter we will see what Esme thinks of her new family.

EPOV

It wasn't an hour after Esme left that the new mom arrived. Emmett's phone rang as we all went towards Carlisle to listen to the conversation.

"The new mom need's time to look around the place before she meets your family. Why don't you go out for a few hours maybe pick up a bite to eat or something." The assistant suggested. "We'll call you on your cell when we are done filming."

"That's fine, thank you." Carlisle said with a strait face. Meanwhile we were all on laughing hysterically at the thought of "grabbing a quick bite to eat."

Theresa Barrett aka New Mom's POV

Words couldn't even describe how thrilled I was I had a family that seemed normal; well at least their house did as my limo pulled into the drive.

I grabbed my bags and made my way into the house. Wow, I wonder what they do for a living. I made my way through the living room and kitchen; I came to another room with a large plasma TV and every game system imaginable.

"This is not good." I said as the camera followed me around. "Video games are a violent waste of time. Not to mention a waste of money."

I ascended a large spiral staircase and entered a bedroom.

"Who's room is this, I would say it looks like a teenager's room since the beds are not made." I glanced over to the wall opposite me. "Who need's that much music, probably a lot of bad rap music or rock." I said as I made my way to the next room.

Two more beds. "Well I can deal with four kids." I said to the camera as I entered the room. Pretty simple and clean both bed's were made, I noticed the closet door was left open. "Oh my," I said startled. "No kid should have this much clothing. All of this for two girls. This is more clothing than my whole family has. There is no way they can wear all of this. What a waste." I caught my rambling and made my way out of the room. I walked further down the hall and came to another bedroom.

"More kids?" I said as I entered the room and noticed two more beds.

I glanced around the room and found a picture. I picked it up and looked at it. It was a girl of about ten or twelve a little older than my own daughter. She was being pushed on a swing by an older man, well I guess he could have been a teenager. Dark skin, probably Native American. As I went to put the picture back the picture slid out of the glass, scribbled on the back it said _Nessie and Jake_ with little hearts. This was too disturbing to even say anything in front of the camera.

I asked the camera man to stop rolling for a minute. I closed my eyes and said a prayer for this family and this little girl. Something was not right here.

After a few minutes I made my way out the hall and came to another staircase. I made my way up to find another bedroom. This one with only one bed, I thought this could possibly be the master room although it was rather small. I opened up the closet and found more clothes; from the look of it a teenage boy, a rather large teenage boy.

"How many kids do they have?" I said doing the math in my head…seven? "Where do the parents sleep?"

I was about to leave the room when I something sparkly caught my eye. I reached over and let out a gasp as I pulled out a sequined corset. I couldn't hide this, the camera saw it.

"I wouldn't even wear this. What is it doing in a teenage boy's room." I said quickly getting out of the closet.

I made my way back to the first floor of the house. I still hadn't found the master bedroom.

I sat down at the kitchen table and began reading the guide the old mom had left.

_Dear New Mom,_

_My husband Carlisle and I have adopted seven children. Six of them attend high school while I home school our youngest daughter Renesmee. My day begins around four a.m. when I get up to spend some time with Carlisle before he goes to work. He is a doctor and usually doesn't come home until late in the evenings. I then get the kid's up for school; and pack their lunches. After that I home school Renesmee until the other's get home from school. We don't have a schedule for school. I have learned that children learn best when they are learning the things they want to learn. Once the rest of the kid's get home from school she can go play with them while I clean. _

_My children have been through a lot in their lives and have surprisingly turned out to be well rounded young adults. I don't enforce any rules on them letting them learn from their own mistakes. _

_Dinner's at our house are basically grab what you want since none of the children can ever agree on anything I gave up cooking a long time ago. _

_Sometimes I won't even see them from the time they get home until the next morning. They are good kid's but don't let them fool you, they do like to play pranks. Hopefully they will remain well behaved for the next two weeks. _

_Oh and by the way, if you couldn't find the master bedroom it is around the corner behind the kitchen. That's also the entrance to the garage and Carlisle's study. We tend to like our privacy from the children. _

_Good luck_

_Esme Cullen_

"There's more to this massive house?" I made my way back to the bedroom and study. I opened a door and found that this was the garage.

"Who has these kinds of cars? I asked as I looked at the cars. "A yellow Porsche, a sweet Mercedes, a Ferrari F-430, a red BMW and a silver Volvo. These cars alone cost more than the average American family makes a year." I reminded myself to close my jaw and made my way back to the hall.

The next door I opened turned out to be the bedroom. It was beautifully decorated with many priceless antiques. "Hmm I think I would keep my kids out of a room like this too" I turned and made my way to the study.

"Someone likes to read." I said as I glanced over to Carlisle's bookshelves. "Wow I thought the other room had a lot of antiques, most of these books look hundred's of years old." I picked one up and glanced over at it, "_16th__ Century Europe: A history_, _Quileute Legends, Dracula, The Bible, Mythical Creatures, _This isn't good, at least they had a bible but did they regard it as a mythical story? These people need to get to church." I said to the camera as a car pulled up.


	6. Esme's POV before meeting new family

A/N: First of all I don't want anyone reading this to see this as anti christian. I am a believer in Christ and I mean no disrespect to anyone's opinions. This is simply a story. Speaking of stories, all of these characters are owned by SM, not me. Thanks, read, review, and enjoy.

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EsPOV

This was a big mistake. I sighed as I made my way out of the limo and into the new families house, at least it was hurricane season. I knew there would be a problem the moment I got to the airport and realized that I would be heading to Florida.

The house looked normal enough from the outside, two story typical middle class. I opened the front door as the camera followed me in the house.

The first thing that caught my attention was the large cross hanging in the entrance way. Under it was written As for me and my house We will serve the Lord. I had a feeling that my family was going to be having a hard time back home.

I glanced around the living room, there was a large boar's head hanging over the mantle. "I take it they like to hunt." I said to the camera as I made my way into the kitchen.

"Lot's of meat in the fridge too." I said realizing that she would have to maintain a vegetarian diet in my family.

"Let's see where the kid's stay." I said making my way up the stairs. Upstairs I found three bedrooms. The first room I entered was covered in the local high school football team, a letter jacket hung from the chair. On the other side of the room above the second bed a plaque hung on the wall commemorating Karate accomplishments.

The next room I entered was adorned in pink, I noticed the ballet slippers hanging over the smaller bed, to the other side was a set of pom-pom's and photo's of a girl of about sixteen or seventeen in a cheerleading uniform. In the center of the room their was a shelf with trophies from ballet and karate.

"A very high achieving family." I said as I made my way through the rest of the house. I entered the master bedroom the bedding was lined with embroidered crosses. Above the bed was another wall vinyl with writing. And the greatest of these is love.

"I would think that would put a damper on the sex life." I said embraced once I realized what I had just said would be on TV.

I made my way out of the bedroom and headed back to the kitchen to read the guide to running this family.

_To new mom,_

_We believe in raising our children with high moral standards. We believe in not only bringing them up to be children of God but also upstanding members of society. Kristi is our oldest, she is seventeen, and active in cheer leading as well as FFA, and student government. Sean is fifteen and play's football and is a member of the FFA. Jenny is eight, she attends ballet practice three times a week while Noah is in karate three times a week. All of the children do volunteer work at a local nursing home every other Saturday. With our schedule we are constantly on the move. _

_My day is spent cleaning along with bible study Tuesdays and Thursdays. Monday, Wednesday and Friday I volunteer at a local homeless shelter before picking the kids up from school._

_Tim works as a construction manager. Being high up has it's benefits, we don't think about monetary benefits though. We don't lavish the children with materialistic objects. No matter how busy we are we make sure to have a family dinner every evening. To save money and teach the children values the boys do a lot of hunting for the major source of our meat. Dinner is followed every night by devotions._

_We believe if children are not kept active they will get into trouble, drugs, gangs, sex, our children are not allowed to date and as you may have noticed there is no TV in the house. We do have a computer but it is kept in the locked room upstairs. They may use it for homework with my direct supervision._

_In faith_

_Theresa Barrett _

"I won't deny children need boundaries but this is ridiculous. If you raise your children right you shouldn't have to be this strict, they need to make their own decisions." I said feeling bad for my family; wondering what "my kids" got us into.

I heard a car pull up to the driveway I walked to the front door nervous about meeting the new family.


	7. The mom's meet their new families

A/N: Okay here's what the families think of their new mom's. Just a little reminder. I don't own the characters, SM does. Damn her. LOL J/K Without her we wouldn't have them in the first place.

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EPOV

"Well?" Carlisle asked as we pulled up to the house?

_What does she think of us?_

I paused for a moment scanning the house for her thoughts.

"One of the crew member's thinks she's crazy." I said still listening for her thoughts.

_I wonder what kind of exotic car they're in. I swear, total waste of money. What's taking them so long? Maybe they are just nervous too._

"She's wondering what's taking us so long, be nice she seems nervous." I said to the rest of the family as we made our way to the house.

I reached out for Bella's hand, Carlisle coughed mumbling something about incest.

"Sorry, habit." I whispered smiling at Bella as I stepped further away from her.

We opened the door and made our way into the house. The new mom met us at the entrance.

"Hi new mom." Emmett said handing her a bouquet of flowers and reaching out to hug her.

_Wow, he's really strong…okay, this is awkward._

"Emmett, back off" low enough the humans wouldn't hear.

I glanced over to Rose who was eyeing the new mom. She was actually jealous.

_But the flowers are nice._

"Hi," Carlisle said shaking her hand. "I am Carlisle, your new husband, these are my children. He went around the room and introduced all of us."

_They all look like they have had plastic surgery, they're all perfect._

"I'm Theresa Barrett, it's a pleasure to meet you."

We made our way to the living room to sit and learn about the new mom.

"How many kid's do you have?" Alice asked as we sat down.

"Four, Kristi is seventeen, Sean is fourteen, Jenny's eight and Noah is six." Theresa replied.

"What do ya'll do for fun?" Emmett asked.

_He must be the one with the corset. Nothing as risqué as this family. No, I can't say that. _

_We will address those issues soon enough._

Corset? What did she find and why would she think Emmett had one?

"My children are very active in school and sports. Do any of you guys play sports?"

We all glanced around at each other, "No" Jasper said breaking the silence.

_Well that will change._

Oh shit, group sports? It was hard enough harnessing our strength in gym class. I think the look on my space told Bella we would soon be involved in sports.

"I can't play sports, too clumsy." She said quickly.

"You can always start." Theresa reminded her. "You can't be that bad. Maybe Ballet would be good for you, my daughter enjoys it. Helps with the balance." Bella cringed remembering her last time in a ballet studio. Bella simply nodded her head. I wanted to rush over and grab my sweet angel, yet I was stuck sitting her on the opposite side of the room next to Carlisle.

"What about church Carlisle?" Theresa asked.

"I give my children the choice to believe what they want."

"Do you believe?" she asked him.

"I believe," Carlisle responded "That there is some greater being, something beyond this world."

_That's just lazy parenting, but obviously he doesn't truly believe. _

"That should be good for tonight. The camera's will still be following you guys around, but the actual swap doesn't start until the morning." One of the camera men announced. "Just act normal."

Wrong thing to say to this family.

"Why don't you guys go upstairs and finish any homework you might have." Carlisle suggested giving us the opportunity to hide in our rooms.

"I don't have any homework. Can I call Jake?" Nessie asked.

_Jake, the guy from the picture. This should be interesting._

What did she know about Jake? I looked over to Carlisle and slowly shook my head.

"Not right now sweetie." Carlisle explained. The frown on Nessie's face broke my heart but I needed to find out what she knew about Jake first.

We made our way up to our rooms; Jasper sat down and began reading a book. I lay down on the bed closed my eyes and imagined lying here with Bella; wondering how I was going to get through the next two weeks.

EsPOV

I watched as the front door opened and a tall man in his mid to late fifty's entered followed by our darling kids. The children stood behind him, glancing over at me. They seemed extremely shy.

"Hi, I'm Tim Barrett, and these are my children, Kristi, Sean, Jenny, and Noah."

"Hello" they all said in unison.

I walked over and shook each of their hands.

Tim escorted us into a family room which I now noticed did not have a TV. Actually the more I looked around I realized how simplistic the room actually was.

"So Esme, tell us about your family." Tim said sitting beside his children. I watched the camera men circling around us getting the right angle; I suddenly felt as if I was on the hot seat.

"My husband and I have adopted seven children." I watched their jaws drop when I told them this. "Edward and Alice were the first two they are seventeen, Jasper and Bella are also seventeen, Emmett and Rosalie are almost eighteen and Renesmee is ten."

"How old are you?" Tim asked probably wondering how we had so many teenagers at such a young age.

"Thirty one." I replied

"And your husband?" He asked."Thirty two." I said becoming slightly frustrated.

"How old were you when you started adopting?" I really felt like I was on the hot seat now.

I continued to explain our story as he looked at me in disgust.

"I don't mean to be rude but do you really think you can parent children correctly at such a young age? I mean we were both thirty nine when we had Kristi." I just looked at him uncertain of what to say. I was this age when I first had my son in my human years. I had a low tolerance for judgmental people; I sat back and decided how to tear him apart limb from limb. Calm yourself Esme, I reminded myself. I smiled thinking of how Edward would laugh if he heard these thoughts. I'm not normally a violent person.

"All of my children were adopted from difficult situations, do you think it would be better to leave them. I have no doubt that most of them would be dead by now if not for Carlisle and I." I concealed a smile; if they only knew the truth.

"Besides," I continued trying to put this human in his place. "Rosalie was accepted to Harvard, she is going to med school. While Emmett had to choose Yale, got to keep things interesting." I smiled. Now tell me who's not raising their kids right. I thought to myself quickly reminding myself this was all a sham. But my kids have been to med school, so I should be proud.

"Okay, we can get started tomorrow. You can just relax tomorrow night, in the morning you will follow the old mom's routine." One of the assistants mentioned.

Tim showed me to my room where I would be "sleeping" . I gazed out the window, Florida was really beautiful, but I missed the mountains and the cold, especially Carlisle's cold hands.

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A/N: BTW For those of you following A New Addition I updated the story on the pups. Sorry, had to put the plug in there, i love my pups though.


	8. The first day with the Cullen's

A/N: Okay, this chapter came out a little longer than expected but there is a lot of foreshadowing of what the new mom's changes might be. Next chapter will go back to Esme's first day. ~

Read~Review~Enjoy~

Oh and by the way I still haven't found a way to own Edward so SM still owns everything.

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TPOV

Day one:

I hit the alarm clock. Four thirty a.m. who the hell gets up this early. There was a knock at the door.

"Theresa? Esme's usually up by now." I heard Carlisle's gentle voice.

"I'm getting up, I'll be out in a few minutes." I said wishing I could close my eyes again.

I made my way out to the front porch and found Carlisle sitting there reading the newspaper.

"Good morning," He said

"Morning," I replied sleepily. "So, what time do you go to work?"

"I leave around six." Carlisle replied. "And I am usually home around eight."

"Doesn't that take away from your family? How many days do you work?" I asked thinking of how distant he must be from his kids.

"I see them every night and I am home every weekend." Carlisle responded sounding sort of annoyed.

"But is it worth missing your children to have all of these toys?" I asked thinking of the cars and clothes, and the other thousands of pointless things in the house.

"Our money is old family money, in reality I don't have to work. I choose to work." Carlisle said.

"You should probably get the kids up. Usually a simple knock will do; they tend to be light sleepers." He said smiling. I got the impression there was some sort of private joke in the statement.

I made my way upstairs, stopping at the first door which if I remembered was Jasper and Edwards room. I knocked and heard some mumbling about being up. I stood at the next door, about to knock when the short perky girl I remembered as Alice opened the door. It was strange, like she knew I was there.

"Hi mom!" She said smiling. "Were up already, got to figure out what to wear you know." I looked into the room there were clothes scattered everywhere; Bella came out of the closet in Jeans and a sweater.

"Alice, this is what I am wearing, deal with it." Bella grumbled.

Alice gave a disapproving look as she shut the door on me.

Two down, two to go. I knocked on the next door, Rosalie quickly came to the door and explained that Renesmee get's to sleep in until seven. Wow this was easy, I said thinking of how my children don't ever get up this easily. I walked up to the third floor and knocked on the door. No answer; I knocked again.

This was Emmett's room. Did I dare open the door? "Emmett, time to wake up?" I said as I knocked on the door.

I looked over to the camera guy, he just shrugged. I called him and knocked one more time with no answer.

"Emmett, I'm going to come in." I said turning the doorknob.

I entered his room and found him sleeping under his blankets. I walked over to the bed and something caught my eye. I bent down for a closer look; women's underwear. How the hell did that get in here? I looked over to the window, there was no way anyone could get up this high.

"Emmett, get up now. Where did these underwear come from?" I asked pulling the blankets back. Wrong move, Emmett jumped up in complete shock. I realized why; he was completely naked. "Okay! I'm up!" He screamed pulling the blankets back over him. The camera man had left, can't be putting that on TV so I decided to ask him again why there was girls underwear in his room.

"I…um…it's embarrassing…I…like to wear it." He said obviously lying.

Either way there was something defiantly wrong with this picture.

I made my way back downstairs, in the kitchen all the kids were laughing and whispering. They couldn't have heard what happened up there could they?

I packed all of the kids lunches; thinking of how much I was going to miss meat. Maybe I should take them hunting after the rule change.

Once the kids were off to school I went back to wake up Renesmee.

I came back down to make her some breakfast; and waited for her to join me.

"So, where does your mom keep your schedule?" I asked as she ate.

"No, we don't really have a schedule, we just study what sounds interesting. Basically we come up with a subject and I Google it." She replied.

"So where is your mom while you are on the computer?" I asked in disbelief that they allowed their ten year old on-line by herself.

"Talking to me or reading, sometimes she does some gardening." She said.

I almost jumped when I heard a loud howling come from the woods.

"We have a stray that hangs around here." She explained. "May I be excused, I need to use the phone."

"Who do you need to call this early?" I asked.

"My friend Jake." She said smiling as she looked out the window.

Jake…The guy from the picture. Maybe I should use this time to find out about this Jake guy.

"How old is Jake?" I asked as I sat down next to her.

"Nineteen." She replied. At least she wasn't trying to hide anything.

"How do you know Jake?"

"He's friends with my momma, and sort of with daddy." She replied, looking as though she regretted it after she said it.

"How does your mom know Jake?" I asked hoping she didn't realize where this conversation was going.

"They umm… were going to adopt him but he turned eighteen before they did so now he just comes over and hangs out with us." Renesmee replied, something still didn't add up.

"So Jake is like a big brother?" I asked watching her face to gauge her reaction.

"Yeah," She said smiling genuinely.

Maybe I was wrong. "You can call Jake after school." I explained to her hoping I wouldn't later regret it.

I sat and read a book while she did her school work. Coming up with things I would change once the rules changed.

At three fifteen I heard two cars pull up and realized that the rest of the kids were home. I went outside to meet them. Suddenly a large shaggy brown dog came running up to the Volvo barking; Bella got out of the car and pet it.

"Who's dog?" I asked as I walked over to them.

"Oh, that's just some stray mutt that hangs around here. We call him Scruffy." Rosalie said her and Emmett headed inside.

The dog let out a growl in her direction almost as if he had understood her. Edward was next to Bella and it almost seemed as if they were having a conversation with the dog.

"Renesmee, look Scruffy came up to the house." Bella said with an emphasis on his name.

Renesmee took off and ran over to him, flung her arms around his neck and pet the top of his head.

The kids slowly filed in the house and I joined them. I looked out the kitchen window into the garden and watched Renesmee playing with the dog.

"Why don't you guys just adopt him? Bring him into the house?" I asked.

"Rose is allergic to dogs." Emmett said laughing.

"It is getting cold though, maybe we could keep him in the basement at night." Bella suggested.

"See what you did now?" Rose said with an attitude. "Now were going to have to let the mutt in the house." I watched as she stormed out of the room.

"Maybe I overstepped my boundaries." I said as I realized everyone was laughing. "But my children would never talk to me like that." They kept on laughing. Was I missing something.

Finally they all decided that they were going upstairs to do their homework. "I think you have some cleaning to do." Emmett said as they headed upstairs.

Nessie made her way back into the house and headed to her room.

I began cleaning, the house was massive. If it were me I would get rid of one of the cars and hire a cleaner. Esme must be exhausted at the end of the day.

I was mopping the kitchen when I heard someone come in the door.

He was tall and muscular with a tan completion. Jake, I thought remembering the picture I had seen him in.

"May I help you?" I asked walking towards him as he made his way to the stairs.

"Oh, sorry I was just here to see Nessie." he said as if it were no big deal.

"Nessie? Oh Renesmee right?" I asked clearing up the confusion.

"Yeah, I kind of gave her the nickname Nessie. Bella hates it though, reminds her of the lockness monster." He said laughing.

"Do you usually just walk in without knocking?" I was in shock.

"Uh, yeah, sorry." he looked confused.

"What are you going to do with her?" I asked sternly. These people may allow this kind of behavior but I don't care who's rules we are going by, I couldn't sit back and watch a grown man take advantage of a little girl.

"Well, I think Alice and I were going to take her shopping." he said stumbling over his words.

"Well," Before I could finish my sentence Alice was downstairs dragging Renesmee with her. How did they hear our conversation?"We'll see you later." Alice said pulling them both out the door.

This was just weird. I would have to dig a little deeper find out more about this Jake guy.

Dinner time came and I watched as the kids wondered into the kitchen grabbed some food and headed back into their room.

Carlisle arrived home from work and the two of us made rounds talking to each of the kids for a few minutes. It didn't' seem to differ from the rounds he probably made at the hospital. I explained to him that Alice and Renesmee were still out shopping.

"Doesn't surprise me." he shrugged. "Alice can't go a day without shopping. Doesn't matter what it is she needs it."

"Isn't that wasteful? There is no way she can possibly need all those clothes." I asked and again he just shrugged.

Wait until rule change I thought to myself. These kids are going to learn some restraint and structure.

We stopped and talked to Jasper who was playing video games in the entertainment room. What a waste of time, another change I would have to make.

Then we went up stairs to Edwards room, I heard someone playing a piano from another room off the side of the bedroom. I didn't even notice this room. Edward played beautifully; at least someone put their time to good use.

"You play beautifully." I said mesmerized by his ability.

"Thank you." he replied.

Bella on the other hand was sitting in a recliner on the other end of the room doing nothing; eyes closed listening to the music.

"Bella, what do you usually do in the evenings?" I asked.

"Oh, umm… listen to Edward, read, I don't know." She replied with almost as much attitude as Rosalie.

Edward pressed his fingers to the bridge of his nose and mumbled something too low for me to understand. Bella must have heard since she let out a little giggle.

"I'll be right back." Carlisle said ducking out of the room.

We stood in an awkward silence for a moment when I decided to go back out to the hallway and find Carlisle.

"Car.." Rosalie said running down the hall "Dad, just chill out!" She said as she made her way back into her room.

"Sorry, her and Emmett were umm…well they have been planning a senior prank. I thought I heard a car pull up when we were talking to Edward and Bella. I came out here and over heard them upstairs umm…conspiring." He said as we made our way back downstairs.

The rest of the night was rather uneventful, a surprise for this family.

I retired to my bed and lay down thinking of all the things that had happened today. Of three things I was certain; one this family was not normal, two, they were hiding something, and three I was bound to find out what it was.


	9. Esme's first day

A/n: Sorry this chapter took a little longer, thanks for being patient. I had a hard time writing it, I wanted this to be more about the Cullen's and the new mom but I thought I should hear from Esme too.

Probably won't hear from her again until the rule change. Let me know if you like it, I will write more about her during the week.

~Read~Review~Enjoy~

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EsPOV

Day one:

I 'woke up' that morning and got all of the kids up. It was kind of nice waking them up, getting them breakfast and packing their lunch, like a real family.

I had plenty of time last night to think about things that were said last night. While I still didn't agree with what Tim had said I was trying to understand his point of view.

I drove the kids to school and realized how nice it was, doing these normal things. Don't get me wrong I love my family, but being teenagers eternally I never got to do the normal parenting things like this. Renesmee was as close as I came to having a baby.

The sky was overcast but I worried what would happen on a sunny day?

"Okay, Kristi, Sean, you guys have a good day." I said as I dropped them off in front of the high school. "I will pick you up at two thirty." "Yes ma'am." They said running up to the building. Their sweet southern manners reminded me of Jasper.

"Okay, let's get you guys to school." I said looking into the rearview mirror at Jenny and Noah.

I made my way into the car line at school. "No, mommy walks us in." Noah said upset I was just going to drop him off.

"I'm sorry." I apologized as I parked.

"Mom doesn't trust us." Jenny said reaching for my hand as Noah did the same to cross the parking lot.

I didn't respond, I still needed time to get to know this family before making anymore jugements.

After both of the kids were at school I did as Theresa does and went to the gym. I quickly (at human speed) did her normal exercises, occasionally increasing my respirations for the camera. I noticed the trainer watching me, probably wondering why and how I hadn't even broken a sweat. I'm sure others were staring; I was too focused on getting out of there to notice.

I went back to the house realizing I had gotten done at the gym too quickly, I had two hours before volunteering at the homeless shelter. I sat down in the kitchen and looked at the calendar set up for the kids. It was crazy too keep them that busy.

I thought about my family and how the new mom was doing hoping that none of them were making her life too hard.

I went to the homeless shelter and inquired what it was that Theresa did there; bible study on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.

Great, I sat down with a group of people most of whom were stoned or recently stoned. The smell of their blood actually repulsed me. I decided to take the first day with them learning more about them and what made them the way they were.

I listened to their stories, drugs, loss of family members, children, divorce, mental illnesses, domestic violence, depression, suicide.

When I first entered I couldn't understand these people, what made them sink so low. Now I knew them, and if not for Carlisle I would fit perfectly into this group.

I drove to pick the children up at school quietly reflecting. Thankful I was unable to cry. The cameraman motioned for me to say something. I hated having all my emotions out in the open like this. "I'm just thinking, all those people, if only they knew how precious life is." Says the woman who is no longer alive I thought.

Sean ran up to the car Kristi following quickly behind. They got into the car and we talked about their day while I drove to pick up Jenny and Noah. They mentioned their homework and it seemed like they had an unusually large amount of it. Maybe it's just because my kids had been through school so many times they didn't have to try anymore.

After we picked up Jenny and Noah we all went to Noah's Karate practice, we had to rush out and make our way back to the high school for Sean's football and Jenny's cheerleading practice. It was six thirty before we got home.

We entered the house to find Tim had cooked dinner.

"It smells wonderful." I said sitting down at the table wondering how I was going to get this food off my plate.

I repositioned the food on my plate occasionally putting some up to my mouth. It wasn't working. I was just going to have to get it down and sneak off before it came back up.

I quickly excused myself to the bathroom. Unfortunately the camera was right behind me, standing on the other side of the door as my dinner came back up.

Maybe for rule change I would change their diet; I laughed to myself.

"Are you okay?" I heard Kristi asking through the door.

"I'm okay." I replied.

"We are going to start our devotions. Dad wants to make sure you come down, he thinks your trying to get out of it because you're a sinner."

"I'll be right there." I told her not worrying about what he had said. I heard hem all downstairs Tim discussing how they were going to save me.

"More like eternally damned." I mumbled under my breath as I made my way downstairs.

After the devotion Tim asked me if I was baptized. I explained to him I was baptized as a infant being that my family was Catholic. At least I thought that was the truth. I sort of remember going to church.

Tim exploded and took off outside, the kids headed upstairs to do their homework. I made my way up to my room wondering what I could do for this family. I was interrupted by a knock at the door. I opened the door to see Kristi.

"Well, Dad's busy and I need to get online to look up something for my homework, when you get a chance can come with me." She asked.

I sat down next to her as she looked at the computer screen.

"Do you sometimes wish you had more freedom?" I asked when it looked like she was about done.

"Yeah, I can't even get a Myspace or Facebook to talk to my friends. Mom thinks I am going to meet some kind of pervert or join the occult or something." Kristi said as she sadly looked at the screen. "It wouldn't be so bad," she continued "If they let me see friends outside of school but I'm not allowed to have friends over or go out unless it's school related."

"I think you're a great person, and probably deserve a little more freedom." I smiled. First thing Monday I would be changing this rule. It was ten and Sean was still doing homework, as I walked through and said goodnight to everyone. Noah was the only one getting any sleep.

"Leave it till the morning." I suggested to Sean.

"No way, mom would die if our homework wasn't done yet. She checks it every night before we turn it in." he said still writing. "I'll bring it down when I am done."

I walked back downstairs realizing these kids had way to much thrust upon them and needed some time to be kids.

It wasn't until ten minutes till midnight that Sean brought his homework down. I checked it and let him go to bed. I walked out to the porch looking for Tim. His car was still gone. I said goodnight to the camera and went up to my room, looking out the window I noticed his car pull up at two thirty in the morning. He stumbled out and I heard him head into his bedroom.

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Next Chapter up soon. Back to the new mom and the Cullen's.


	10. Emmett's revenge

A/N: Back to the Cullen house!

~Read~Review~Enjoy~

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EPOV

Day two:

I looked down at my beautiful angel; ran my fingers through her hair as her head rested on my chest.

"Just like old times." Alice whispered stretching herself across Jasper.

"But I don't have to worry about saying something embarrassing." Bella said opening her eyes.

I smiled and kissed the top of her head; it would have to do for now.

Jazz and I decided to sneak over to his and Alice's room for a few hours tonight.

"How can we get caught between a mind reader and a psychic?" he had asked me, and it seemed like good enough logic.

"He's coming upstairs." I said as I heard Carlisle's thoughts. "Checking to see that we are all in our beds before he wakes her up."

I gave Bella a quick passionate kiss as we ran out of the room.

Jasper reached for the doorknob to our room, busted I thought as I heard Carlisle.

"Busted." Carlisle whispered.

Rose made her way out of Nessie's room as Emmett came flying down the stairs.

"What were you guys doing?" Rose hissed. "I thought I heard something."

"Not fair we got in trouble yesterday, Dad, yell at them!" He said a little too loud.

"Shhh. Everyone please, not now." Carlisle said.

_It's been two days. I went two hundred years before I found Esme, it's not like I don't have needs myself._

"Carlisle, we didn't do anything." I felt bad, he and Esme had never been apart this long. At least I could still see Bella. Shit.

"Camera guys here. He's looking for you." I told Carlisle.

"In your rooms." He said as he made his way downstairs.

Jasper and I listened as Carlisle woke up Theresa and went outside to the porch.

"He's miserable." Jasper said looking out the window. "He's worried about her and misses her. I've tried cheering him up."

"He doesn't want to betray his love for her by having someone manipulate his emotions." I said after catching some of Carlisle's thoughts.

"Theresa's going out with him." I said as Jasper opened the window as we listened to their conversation.

_I'm just going to have to be direct, ask him. Wait…he looks really sad. Maybe he realized how messed up his family is._

I growled wondering who this bitch was to judge so quickly.

"Good morning." I heard Carlisle trying not to let her see his pain.

"Good morning. Can we talk?" She asked.

"Of course."

"Well, I was wondering." She paused. _How do I phrase this?_ "I was wondering what Renesmee and Jake's relationship is?"

_Oh shit, what happened?_ Carlisle's mind was racing trying to think of what may have made her suspect something.

"What do you mean?" he asked smoothly.

"Don't you think it's odd that he's twice her age and comes over to "Play" with her?"

I bolted out the window and whispered to Carlisle the story that Nessie had given her yesterday.

_Thanks Edward_

He explained to her how they were trying to adopt Jake at the same time as Nessie, the two of them bonded. There love was completely that of two siblings. _For now_

I laughed as I headed back up to the room Jasper laughing silently, "If she only knew about the imprint." he whispered. "Just remember she isn't always going to love him like a sibling." I growled at him, maybe a little too loudly.

_That dog must be back, I swear it looks more like a wolf. Why does Carlisle let it hang around?_

"I had another question." Theresa said "Nessie was playing with a dog yesterday, the kids said it was a stray, looked rather clean but it's a big dog, he's not mean right?

"He's been hanging around for a few months now, sort of since we moved in. Never seemed aggressive though." Carlisle replied.

_Should I bring it up? I think maybe we covered enough this morning. Maybe I should talk to Emmett later today. Hopefully I can get him alone and sit and talk to him._

I relayed her last thought to Jasper and we both began laughing hysterically. We needed to make sure Emmett was alone today.

We were awoken and told to get ready for school. We got dressed and stepped out the door at almost the same time Bella and Alice did. The camera man was standing there taping us.

"Human moment" I whispered low enough for Bella to take queue. She smiled and ran to the bathroom.

Alice smiled and decided to play along. "Isabella, you had better hurry up. I need to go too." Alice whined.

Jazz and I laughed as we made our way past the camera guy.

"Five women, two bathrooms." I said smiling as Alice was now joined by Rose as they beat on the door. I could faintly hear Bella laughing.

That morning we took three vehicles to school and decided to use a family emergency as an excuse to miss first period and make up on some much needed alone time.

That may have been a mistake because Theresa was furious when she heard that we had all missed first period. We sat there in the living room as she scolded us on camera on the importance of education, and prayed for our souls, that we would make better decisions.

Nobody said anything to her, we just sat there and listened to her yell.

_Why didn't Esme ever tell us they call when you skip a class? _Emmett asked looking over to me. I just shrugged my shoulders and assumed it was because we had been to high school so many times before she expected us to skip.

_I should have known, I mean I am still close to an actual high school student's age. _Bella dropped her shield and allowed me to get in her head! A huge smile came across my face as I looked at her, her powers were getting stronger if I could hear her from across the room.

"What are you smiling at?" I didn't even notice she was talking to me until Emmett elbowed me.

"Nothing." I said, I didn't care if I gave her an attitude she just interrupted a great moment between me and my wife.

"I'm calling your father." she said walking towards the phone. "I have had enough of this."

"Please, daddy is busy and important, don't bother him at work." Renesmee said coming into the room. "My sister's and brother's don't usually get in trouble, please." Nessie said working those big brown eyes giving her the best sad puppy face.

_Damn, I did teach her well _

I looked over to Alice smiling having a proud aunt moment.

"Girls, shopping." I heard Jasper whisper under his breath.

Alice hopped up and ran to Nessie, "C'mon, let's go shopping." she shrieked running to get her keys.

"Rose, Bella, why don't you go too?" Jasper suggested. "I think Victoria Secrets is having a sale." We both smiled knowing none of them would pass up a sale at Victoria Secrets.

_A ten year old going to Victoria Secrets?_I felt another long hard conversation with Carlisle coming on. Does this woman know we live in the twenty first century? I didn't want to think about my daughter wearing it but I had no objections to her going along.

Before Theresa could say anything to object the girls were out the door getting into the car.

"Hey Em, up for a game?" I asked hoping to abandon him shortly and see where Theresa would take this.

"You ready to have your ass whipped little bro?" He said making his way to the entertainment room.

_I can't believe they allow this kind of language_

Was ass really that bad? She was too uptight.

We started playing Madden 09, I let Emmett start beating me. He was wrapped up in the game, let him think that I'm a sore looser and he'll keep on playing while I leave him open to Theresa I plotted.

"Damn Em, I don't know what's going on here, your kicking my ass here." I sighed. He eyed me suspiciously and then shrugged it off. "I'll grab Jazz, he'll finish for me."

I made my way upstairs.

_He's alone, make your move…He's a teenager, just talk to him, his parents aren't doing anything to save his soul from eternal damnation, it's God's will I need to do this._

I almost fell on the steps laughing of her thoughts of eternal damnation. I noticed the camera at the top of the stairs. "Sorry" I mumbled "just thinking of something."

Jasper and I made our way downstairs and positioned ourselves against the wall so we could just make out Emmett's face.

"Emmett, can we talk?" Theresa approached him and sat on the recliner across from him.

"Sure, what's up" Emmett asked leaning back in his chair.

"I just wanted you to know that sex before marriage is something to take seriously. If you have sex before marriage you are going to go to hell." she said as Emmett's face twisted trying to find words.

_Wow, that's direct, hmmm I am married, but I am pretty sure I'm going to hell too, well if and when I umm die. What do I say? _

I listened to Emmett's thoughts trying to see what he was actually going to tell her.

"We're married." he blurted out.

Theresa almost passed out.

My cell phone rang, I checked the caller ID: Alice. I handed the phone to Jasper who was almost too shocked to grab it.

The camera man circled around and zoomed in on Emmett sitting there with his hand rubbing his forehead wondering why he just said what he said.

"Wait, please" Emmett said trying to explain. "Let me explain. As you know we are not really related right, so there is nothing really wrong with it. I have only know Rosalie for three years. She's not really a sister to me, I have always loved her."

"He's quick." Jasper mentioned surprised Emmett could come up with the story this quickly.

"Your parent's know about this?" Theresa asked still shaking.

"Not about the marriage." Emmett replied "Rose and I just decided that since we are going to college next year, it would be easier to get an apartment off campus."

"An apartment? That's why you got married?" She asked stunned.

Jasper and I had to hold in our laughter, Rose would love this, he married her to find a better apartment.

"Technically we aren't married, not officially. It's two weeks until her birthday, mine is three days later." Emmett continued. "We had a preacher at a small church perform an actual ceremony, just to make things right. Then after our birthdays we will go down to the courthouse."

_There, I told you I got married in a damn church. Does that make you happy? Carlisle is going to kill me. Shit, Rose probably really will kill me. No, worse, I am going to have to let her and Alice plan another wedding._

"Emmett" I snarled. Bringing him out of his thoughts and back into reality where Theresa had been talking to him.

"Did you get married just so you could have sex?" Theresa asked now crying.

"No," Emmett said apologetically. "We've only done it a few times, it's still awkward and there's always so many people in the house." Emmett began sobbing tearlessly putting his head in his hands. "I love her so much more than in just a sexual way."

"Shh" Jasper and I reminded each other, trying to hold back laughter at the thought of Emmett and Rose not interested in sex.

Theresa, still crying made her way over to him and put her hand on his back.

"It's okay, we can sit down with your dad and Rose tonight and discuss everything." she reassured him.

"Thank you." Emmett sobbed keeping his dry eyes hidden under his hands.

"And the Oscar goes to…" I joked as Jasper and I went upstairs to call the girls and see how they were handling things.

* * *

Later that night:

"I could kill him." I whispered to Jasper who was on the other side of the room staring out the window.

Our little plan had backfired on us.

Carlisle had come home from work tonight and we were all sent to our rooms so Carlisle and Theresa could discuss the situation with the newly weds.

Theresa completly bought it, thought that Emmett was some sweet caring husband who was scared to have sex with his own wife.

The end decision:

Nessie was now getting her own room.

Rosalie moved into Emmett's room all with the blessing of Theresa and God.


	11. Day three: More suprises

A/N: I just wanted to say thanks for all of the positive reviews. Sorry if I am unable to get back to everyone; I do appreciate the review though. Keeps me motivated and writing.

I'll let ya'll read the next chapter now. Just remember I don't own these characters.

~Read~Review~Enjoy~

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EmPOV

Day three:

Carlisle wasn't too thrilled with what happened yesterday. In fact if I wasn't dead they probably would have killed me.

Actually Bella did threaten to kill me ha, already dead little sis.

Edward made sure I knew I wouldn't have a single thought that he didn't hear. I could make that much worse for him than it would be for me.

Alice remained silent; meaning she knew something.

Jasper though, he was playing dirty.

Last night as we made our way into our room it was time for some much needed crazy monkey sex. However, with the human in the house I settled to quietly make love to my wife. That is until Jasper picked up on my emotions. Next thing I knew my emotions were all over the place. I curled up ready to cry in fear, the next minute I was jumping out of bed in a rage of anger, next I sat at the edge of the bed too depressed to move. I finally felt like I was again in control of my emotions.

I crawled up to the top of the bed and straddled myself over her. I leaned down and kissed her lips, slowly moving my lips down her jaw nibbling on her neck. I moved my hands down her chest pushing down her bra as my hand gazed over her nipple.

Suddenly I jumped back screaming at Rose to cover herself up, as I looked for something to cover myself up. I was embarrassed standing there naked ashamed of the situation.

"Jasper is going to pay for this." I told Rose who was looking at me completely confused.

I asked Rose to put some clothes on as I got dressed. I climbed into bed and we lay there talking through the night.

I looked at the clock, three a.m I had time to sneak out and see Jasper.

I quietly made my way down the stairs, I turned the corner and found Alice standing in the hall.

"I wouldn't plan on starting anything else." She warned.

Shit, what did she see? What were they planning.

"Alice, do you have any idea what my night has been like?" I asked.

She just nodded, of course she knew. She probably enjoyed watching me suffer.

"Alice, Jazz messing with my emotions like this is not right! It's like vampire erectile dysfunction or something." I whined.

I heard Carlisle laughing from the stairs.

"Emmett, don't you think you got yourself into this mess?" he said walking up the stairs.

"This isn't fair." I continued to whine.

"Life's not fair, now get back in your rooms." Carlisle said.

I went back upstairs for a second I felt better, ready for that crazy monkey sex. For the next two hours every time Rose would take her shirt off I was hit with mood swings and erectile dysfunction. It was a vicious cycle and I was more than glad when the time came to go to school.

Jasper was easily distracted by Alice at school allowing Rose and I to skip during a few of our classes. Jasper couldn't keep this up every night.

BPOV

"Back to hell." I sighed as we pulled into the driveway returning from school.

"This isn't hell." Alice said frowning. "Wait until next week."

"You want to grab Renesmee and go shopping?" I asked Alice.

Edward began chuckling, I looked over at him sitting there with my favorite crooked grin. "Love, I never imagined I would hear YOU ask Alice to go shopping."

I smiled realizing how bad it really was at home.

"Sorry Bells" I heard Jasper from the back seat. "Need to hunt, Alice and I are going to go hunt this evening."

"What kind of excuse are you using?" I asked hoping Edward and I could come up with one too.

"That we have a research paper due in biology and need to get some night photos." Jasper said smiling smugly.

"Edward, we need an excuse!" I said as he stopped the car and we got out.

"What's wrong?" I asked Edward as I looked at the porch and saw Nessie sitting on the front step waiting for us.

"That Bitch." he snarled.

"She was harassing Nessie about Jake. Nessie bumped into her tripped and fell. Her hand landed on her face. Ness thinks Theresa may have seen something." Edward explained as we approached our daughter.

"Ness, Shhh…" I whispered motioning to the cameras.

"What's wrong squirt?" Edward said trying to play big brother.

Nessie put her arms around her knees and tucked her head to her chest, I watched Edward listening intently to her. To the camera's it looked like she was refusing to talk to him as we stood in silence waiting for her to talk.

"You want to go for a walk?" I asked hoping maybe the camera's wouldn't follow. "Just us girls?"

She looked up at me, trying to smile and nodded her head.

We took off towards a clearing in the woods only to realize that reality TV didn't care about exploiting peoples emotions, in fact it thrived on it.

"What happened today?" I asked.

She sat down on a rock, camera's in place recording everything. I caught Jacobs scent but ignored it because of the camera's. Ness must have been too upset to notice, I hoped that she wouldn't say anything she didn't want him to hear. She put her hand in mine and contorted her face slightly, showing things this was still hard but she was getting better at utilizing her powers.

She explained to me what had happened I ignored her words and watched the play by play running through her mind. _"Renesmee, I spoke with your father and he explained yours and Jacobs relationship." Theresa said as she came up behind Nessie at the computer. _

"_Okay." Nessie replied a little more sarcastically than I had ever seen her._

"_Well, I just want you to know I still find it inappropriate and I don't want him over here while I am here." She added._

"_These aren't your rules bitch." Nessie snapped. _

I flinched from the vision for a moment. I had never heard this kind of language from Renesmee_. _I was disappointed but at the same time happy she stood up for herself. I made a mental note to talk to her about this later, without cameras.

"_I will not tolerate this kind of language from a spoiled little brat like you." Theresa said bending down to Nessie's height as she sat on the chair by the computer._

"_Sorry, but you don't have any idea what my life is like. My mother died giving birth to me. Jake's mom died when he was younger, it's something we have in common. We have bonded. I would think a good Christian woman like you would show some compassion and not think of everything in a perverted way." Nessie screamed at her._

"_So why do you have little hearts around your names on the back of the picture in your room?" Theresa asked._

"_You went through my stuff?" Nessie screamed tears running down her cheeks. "That is none of your business."_

She pulled her hand back and looked at me.

"Then I got mad and tried to run out away from her, she stopped me and we crashed into each other. My hand went flying down and I hit her in the face."

That was the story she told the camera. She began crying again as I wrapped my arms around her as she slowly brought her hand to my face to show me what really happened without the camera's noticing.

_Nessie pushed the chair out from under her, stood and tried to run out of the room. Theresa stopped her and they crashed head on with Nessie landing on top of her crushing her hand into her face._

_Theresa's face was in shock. She had obviously seen something. _

"You know I love Jake." She said still crying. "I didn't mean it as anything more than a friendship. He is my best friend, I can't help that there is such an age difference. Do you think it's wrong." I held my daughter in my arms listening to her ramble on.

"I know, you two are very special we all know Jake would never do anything to you. We will get dad to talk to Theresa tonight." I reassured her.

I ran my fingers through her hair looking at my sweet little girl, I could kill Emmett and Jasper for doing this show, putting my angel through this. The anger was starting to build up when I noticed a Jake's big tongue slide across Nessie's face as he playfully panted at her side.

"Scruffy!" I scolded him.

"Ewww…doggy kisses." Nessie giggled.

I let out a sigh of relief realizing it wouldn't be long before my little girl no longer said Ewww to his doggy kisses.

"C'mon Ness, let's go in." I suggested. "Scruffy can come too." I said as we walked back up to the house.

I left Renesmee and "Scruffy" out on the front porch.

I entered the house and shot Theresa an evil look as I headed up to our room, the sound of Edward playing quickly calming me down.

I was disappointed to learn that Alice and Jasper had left. I wanted to get out of the house too but I felt bad leaving Ness. I filled Edward in on what Ness had showed me. We decided we needed Carlisle to intervene, maybe suggest that she had gotten a slight concussion and was hallucinating.

It was too much temptation to stay with Edward without touching him. I decided to go downstairs and make Nessie some dinner and talk with Theresa.

I stepped out to the front porch and noticed Nessie sitting on the chair reading a book Jake curled up at her feet.

"Renesmee, dinner's done." I motioned her to come in. "Scruffy, c'mon maybe we can find you some scraps."

"Would you like dinner Theresa?" I asked and she eyed me suspiciously.

"I didn't realize you guys cook." She huffed making her way into the kitchen.

"Umm..?" Theresa asked looking at the food.

"Agedashi-esque Tofu " I replied. "It's fried tofu with onions, stir fried rice and vegetables." I said smiling appearing to take a bite for the camera.

"You guys eat this stuff?" Theresa asked looking disgusted.

"Oh yeah, it's great." Nessie said taking a bite of rice and vegetables. The camera man turned for a moment and Nessie dropped the tofu to the floor for Jake. A few moments later I caught my break and dropped the contents of my plate on the floor as well.

Poor Jake having to eat this; I thought. Oh well he did doggy kiss my daughter, I guess that means he owes me.

Carlisle made his way in and explained he grabbed dinner at the cafeteria before leaving work. I mentioned that Edward wanted to talk to him. Carlisle made his way upstairs as I started doing the dishes.


	12. Beware of Dog

A/N: I'll make this short and sweet

1) I own nothing

2) I wish to express my gratitude for the wonderful reviews

3) I hope you enjoy the story!

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EPOV

I heard Carlisle making his way up the stairs and listened to make sure no camera's were following. It was safe, the cameras remained downstairs waiting for a cat fight between Bella and Theresa. I changed the song I was playing to one that I knew to be one of his favorites.

"This song reminds me of Esme." He said smiling at me as he entered the room.

"It's her song." I reminded him smiling.

"You needed to talk to me?" Carlisle asked.

"We had a slight problem today." I explained. "Nessie and Theresa got into a argument."

_What is she married too now?_

I growled at that thought.

"Edward, chill." Carlisle laughed.

I regretted being short with him, he has had to put up with more the past few days from us than probably as long as we have been a family.

"No, they got into a fight and Nessie went to get up, fell and hit her in the face." I explained.

"But it was an accident right?" Carlisle asked completely missing the big picture. How could a three hundred year old man be so clueless. Oh well, I cut him some slack seeing how he was being deprived of his wife.

"Carlisle, she touched her, she showed her something."

_What?_

I took it that he couldn't get words out, "She was thinking of Jake and how she's loved him in some sense since she was born. She was remembering the first time he held her after she was born." I explained.

Still no response from Carlisle, can vampires go in shock?

"Carlisle, I don't think she suspects it was Ness that he was holding. I have been listening to her thoughts, she thinks that Nessie wants to have Jacobs baby. I don't think she see's it as a vision from Nessie but God showing her how to save Nessie's soul. She won't mention it, she may act on it but she won't tell them Nessie had a vision. She might call it a vision from God though"

_Damn cameras_

We listened as the cameraman made his way towards the bedroom.

_I'll talk to her tonight. Just to be sure. Maybe convince her she suffered some head trauma._

I nodded as he walked out of the room.

NPOV

I can't believe I was that stupid. She can't think it was me he was holding though, I mean Jake would have been as old as I look now ten years ago. I hope grandpa isn't mad, this could ruin the family. What if she discovers what we are?

I sat out on the front porch my hand resting on the tuff of Jakes coat. I let the days events replay for him.

"Renesmee can you come inside?" I heard grandpa calling me.

I went inside to find him and Theresa sitting in the living room.

"Renesmee, I am sorry for the way that I behaved earlier. Your right, I don't know what your life has been like." She apologized.

"I'm sorry too." I said trying to be as polite as possible. I still didn't trust her. "You must have hit your head pretty hard when you fell, are you okay?" I asked hoping she would give some insight.

"Oh, I'm fine."

I wish daddy were here, he had to be listening though.

I quickly explained that I was rather tired and asked grandpa if I could be excused to bed. I made my way up to bed stopping by to say goodnight to dad and momma. I was curious what he found out.

"Alice knows more than I do right now, she called to say she had a vision you have a surprise coming next week." he said grinning.

"What is it?" I asked looking to them for answers.

"You'll find out soon enough. Remember I love you and nothing bad will happen. I however am still your father."

_That's so unfair! Was I in trouble? I had never really been punished. I don't think that's what it was. _

Daddy laughed at my thoughts, momma elbowed him in the side and promised me it would all be okay.

I kissed them both and made my way into bed.

Day four:

JBPOV

Yesterday I had decided that I needed to go to La Push for a few days. I spent the first half of the morning trying to convince myself that Nessie would understand. Of course she would understand; the problem was me. I couldn't leave her. I decided to wait until after school got out, get someone to get me an extra pair of clothes and talk to her. After what happened yesterday there was no way I was leaving her.

I looked down at my paws covered in mud. It rained so hard last night I woke up feeling like I was going to be buried in the mud. What could I do? I can't leave Nessie here with that witch. I laughed thinking of what she showed me yesterday.

My sweet Nessie called her a bitch. I shouldn't be surprised considering some of the language she hears from Emmett. Still, it was hard imaging her growing up.

Theresa's accusations, while they may be untrue now, I knew it was only a matter of time until these issues became real.

I stretched myself out on a dry spot of grass by Esme's garden thinking about Nessie. What happens when she looks like she's seventeen, eighteen? Will she age to be older looking than Edward and Bella? If she is a four or five year old in a young woman's body do I have to wait until she's actually in her teens? For the past few years I have taken things one day at a time and just enjoyed being with her. I never considered some of these things.

Why did she have hearts around our names behind that picture? Was she starting to see me differently? I assumed Edward or Jasper would pick up on any lustful thoughts she may have towards me. One thing was for sure Nessie and I needed to have a talk once this was all over with.

I closed my eyes and must have dozed off for a few minutes. I awoke to hear Nessie inside playing Edwards piano. I immediately recognized the song, she and Edward had composed it; it was her song.

I heard Theresa make her way into the garden. She sat down and began reading a book. After a few minutes she began talking to the camera.

"There is something very wrong with this family. Under normal circumstances I would never approve of such a young marriage. I sort of feel bad for Emmett though. He seems like such a smart young kid. Rosalie also is a very polite young woman. You would think being that beautiful she would be conceited."

I rolled over to my back laughing. Well, wolves don't laugh but I was defiantly laughing on the inside.

"The others," She continued a look of disgust forming over her face "are all spoiled brats. Alice has an addiction to shopping that needs to be stopped. Jasper has this look on his face like he is overstressed and about to have a stroke. Bella and Edward seem to keep to themselves a lot. These kids need activity, involvement in school and sports. Renesmee is a totally different story. She needs to mix with kids her own age. I haven't seen that Jake in a few days maybe Carlisle took what I said into account. Finally realized that boy is a sexual predator in the making." She sat looking at the camera, probably thinking of more ways to insult this family I have come to call my own.

A predator, I thought to myself. I'll show her a predator. I leaped up and ran through the garden. She jumped up as I ran past her, once she was on her feet I turned back towards her. I halted at her feet and snarled baring my teeth as I watched her stumble over her feet trying to run.

The cameraman was already halfway to the house when she finally got her bearings and picked up speed I thought of chasing her and decided against it. I have never done anything to upset Carlisle or Edward, I had great respect for them; however this wasn't Jake torturing her it was Scruffy!

I saw Nessie running down the porch steps, Theresa grabbed her by the arm and pulled her into the house.

"Let me out!" I heard Nessie scream.

Her and Theresa were arguing. Apparently she didn't feel it was safe for her to be around me.

I found the spot I had occupied earlier and lay back down. Nessie was back at the piano I closed my eyes and listened to her play.

The cars pulled up as Edward, Bella, Alice, Jasper, Emmett and even Rose came running up to me. I wondered how Alice had seen what happened. Maybe she was so focused on keeping an eye out for Nessie and Theresa I broke through into her vision.

"Hey…Scruffy." Bella said giggling.

"Who's a good doggy?" I was surprised even Rose approved of my little adventure.

Before anyone else could say anything Theresa was at the door yelling.

"If any of you go near that mutt I am going to call animal control." she screamed.

"Eternal nap time for the mutt?" Rose asked, I knew her new attitude was too good to be true.

I let out a low growl and took off into the woods.


	13. Esme's new life

A/N: Sorry it took a few days to get this chapter done. Went back to Esme's POV

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APOV

Day five:

"No…no…nooooooo!" This can't be happening.

"Alice? Alice?" Bella said resting her hand on my shoulder. "What did you see? Is something bad going to happen? Is Esme okay?"

"No no no shopping!" I stuttered unable to imagine a week without shopping.

"That's the big rule change?" Bella laughed, "Well damn I thought she was a bitch, if she gets me out of shopping I just may have to thank her."

"I wouldn't laugh yet, your in this too." I reminded her. "But on the plus side Edward will love your new uniform."

"Uniform?" Bella gulped.

I just grinned. I had too much to worry about buying before the rule change.

"Bella, we need to go shopping tomorrow." I explained running to the closet to do a quick inventory and think of the things I needed.

"Weren't you going to hunt with Jasper tomorrow?" she asked.

"Damn," I frowned. "Carlisle is off work tomorrow he can go with him. Maybe the guys can go hunting and we can take Theresa shopping."

"C'mon Bella, it will be fun…" I attempted to persuade her when I was hit by another vision.

It was still sort of blurry, Esme cops, snarling at some drunk guy. I immediately turned all of my concentration to the vision, I needed to see what happened to Esme. Finally I saw her, sitting alone on a bed curled into the fetal position.

If I could cry right now I would be, what was happening there? I whispered quietly to Bella what I had seen as we debated whether or not to tell Carlisle.

EsPOV

Five days, five long days with this family. I stood by the window waiting for Tim to come home. Well, he came home earlier, did the good father routine, made dinner, helped the children with their homework, and got them to bed, and made his way to the bar.

I again marveled at how well behaved the kids were but it wasn't normal. Granted my family wasn't normal either I assumed normal siblings bicker and play jokes on one another. It reminded me too much of the Stepford wives and Tim was by means no angel. I closed my eyes and reminded myself how lucky I was to have Carlisle and the rest of the family. How even though their quirks sometimes drive me crazy I love them for them.

I opened my eyes and watched as Tim pulled up. I am assuming that he thought that since the camera's aren't on nobody would say anything. I hate to upset the children but this is not healthy. Rule change was coming and there would be some big changes around here.

I smelt him as he walked in the door.

The smell of Alcohol in his blood intensified the scent of his blood. I could feel my throat tightening as I pushed back the venom. I needed to hunt. I looked out the window and surveyed the area. There was an area not far from here with some woods.

I opened the window.

The house alarm went off. I ran out the room to find a way to turn it off. The phone was ringing I ran to pick it up. "Barrett Residence." I answered to find it was the alarm company.

"This is Elizabeth with Brinks security. Is this Mrs. Barrett? May I have your code?"

"Ummm, no I don't have a code. I am staying here…umm doing wife swap."

"Ma'am I don't care what kind of kinky things you are doing there, I just need the code to turn off the alarm. The police are on their way right now." What? Was she serious? Was this part of the show?

I took off and ran up the stairs, the kids were all standing by their doors."Do any of you know the code?" I asked making my way to Tim's bedroom. Was he really that drunk he didn't hear the alarm?

Next thing I knew the police were pulling up to the house. I banged on Tim's door again, no answer. I had Kristi continue to knock while I went down to talk to the police.

I was explained to the cops that I needed fresh air, so I opened the window not realizing it was hooked into the alarm system.

As I was explaining this to them Tim made his way downstairs. I explained to him what happened and we cleared things up with the police. I went inside and checked on the kids. They all appeared to be sleeping so I made my way back towards my room. I heard Tim stumbling around downstairs, I turned and headed back down the stairs to check on him.

"So why did you need to open a window? You smoking? You doing drugs?" He asked his speech slurred.

"I needed some air, I get claustrophobic at times." I replied.

"Sure, what were you doing up at two in the morning then?" He asked approaching me.

"I might ask you the same." I replied taking a step closer to him, showing him I was not intimidated.

He balled his hand into a fist and raised it at me.

Instinct took over, I snarled at him watching as he backed down slowly. I was so angry the thirst was unbearable, it took every ounce of strength for me to back off of him.

I found the cordless where I had set it in the living room earlier. I picked up the phone and called the production assistant and explained to him the situation.

I sat on the front porch waiting for the car to arrive to take me to a hotel. The car was of course followed by the camera's. I sat in the car and explained what had happened stating I feared for my safety.

Well that may have been a lie, I was never concerned Tim would hurt me, it hurt me emotionally. I was reminded of my human years, my first husband, the pain both physical and emotional seemed to come flooding back when Tim raised his hand to me.

If anything I feared for Tim's and his children's safety.

I made my way into the hotel room leaving the camera's behind and curled up on the bed closed my eyes and imagined Carlisle's cool strong hands wrapped around me.


	14. Day three

A/N: Okay, i went a different way with this chapter, I was writing it and had a hard time making them be mean to Theresa when her husband is beating her. Tried to keep it funny though. Trust me it will all work out in the end.

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CPOV

Day six:

"Daddy" I heard Alice chirp as she entered the room.

"Yes darling?" I said playfully. I always saw them as my children but having them act it out like this was something else. I wished deeply Esme could be here with me now; making my family complete.

"I was wondering if Theresa would like to come shopping with me and the girls?" She asked sweetly.

"Well, that would be up to Theresa." I replied looking over at Theresa.

"What about the boys?" Theresa asked.

"Oh, they can go do their manly things, they go hiking a lot." she said grinning.

I caught the underlining meaning of 'hiking' and decided that a little hunting trip with my boys would be good. Jasper went out a few nights ago but with Theresa in the house I didn't want to take any chances.

"I like to hike." Theresa said "I think it is a better use of time than wasting hundreds of dollars shopping."

I held back a laugh, my girls didn't spend hundreds when they went shopping, they spent thousands.

"So, are we going shopping?" Bella asked as she entered the room.

What? Bella asking to go shopping? Okay, these girls were up to something. I eyed her suspiciously.

"It's okay, trust us." she whispered low to where the camera's wouldn't pick it up.

I nodded and encouraged Theresa to get ready to go shopping.

Edward approached me after the girls had left.

Our hiking trip as it turns out was really going to be a hiking trip. I guess Alice's mind was preoccupied as she failed to realize the camera's would be joining us.

The cameramen were now following Jasper and Emmett around as they loaded up the Jeep.

"They're hiding something." He said uncertain of what it was.

"You think they are planning something against Theresa?"

"No, I can't see any of them wanting to get involved in anything like that. No, this is something else." Edward answered.

"Hey Carlisle, Edward." Jake came running up to the porch. "You guys mind if I take a shower and stuff while everyone is gone?"

"No, and help yourself to some of Emmett's clothes, you smell worse than normal, if that's possible." Edward laughed.

"C'mon" I head Emmett yell as we made our way to the Jeep.

BPOV

Shopping, why the hell am I shopping? I asked myself as we walked into the mall. I looked over to Alice smiling mumbling to herself the things she needed to purchase. "So, how often do you go shopping?" Theresa asked looking at me.

"As little as possible." I replied as I turned to Renesmee.

We headed into the mall and plotted our strategy.

"Where to go first?" I asked knowing Alice already had this planned out.

"Jimmy Choo's" I giggled at Renesmee's enthusiasm for shoes.

"You've been around Alice too long." I laughed as we made our way to Jimmy Choo's. "But I could use some shoes." I sighed as we made our way through the mall.

Nessie picked up a pair of leather studded sandals, as Rose tried on a pair of five inch python platform sandals. I stuck to a pair of simple black patent leather sling backs. I looked over to Alice who had the poor sales girl running around stacking boxes at the counter. Theresa picked up a similar red sling back and set it back down. She was obviously uncomfortable and I had a feeling this spending would make the rule changes worse.

We checked out, I thought we did rather well under Alice's standards, grand total of $2,473.82.

Theresa looked as pale as us as she asked us where we were going next.

"I think we should get the guys some clothes." Alice suggested.

"You do their shopping too?" Theresa asked.

"Alice does ALL the shopping." Rose explained.

We made our way across the hall to Gucci. I decided to pick up a pair of dark denim jeans for Edward. I smiled thinking of how good he would look in them, reminding myself that I can't plan to rip them off of them until I have admired his ass in them a few times.

"Who are those for?" Theresa asked me. "Edward" I replied.

"You two are awfully close." Theresa remarked "I have noticed that. It makes sense that Rose is shopping for Emmett, he's her husband. I think I saw Alice picking up something for Jasper, and you shop for Edward. Do you two have something going on between you?"

"No" I heard Rose answer. "Edward has a girlfriend."

My jaw dropped, what was Rose doing?

"Yeah, him and Jessica have been on and off for a while; and let me tell you something when they're hot, they're hot!"

Oh, she's dead. I was about to make a comment on Rose and Emmett's sex life and decided against it. I needed Alice's help on this one; but Rose was going to pay for that comment.

"I think it's time to head to the other side of the mall." Alice said bags in hand as she winked at me.

"Oh, can I go in and pick up Jake a new pair of glasses?" Nessie asked.

I nodded as we made our way into Cartier. Jakes sunglasses had been broken a few weeks ago after a game of WWE smack down led to an all out brawl.

The one thing I liked about shopping with Ness was she knew what she wanted and bought it. It wasn't a sport to her like it was with Alice.

We made our way out of the store and noticed a group of people standing around a small stage in the atrium of the mall.

A woman handed us a flyer I smiled as I looked down and read it.

_Love Doesn't Hurt_

_A domestic violence forum and Wellness fair_

Theresa wasn't smiling.

"Who the hell lets themselves be beaten by their husband?" Alice asked not looking at Theresa.

I heard her heartbeat increase as she held back the tears forming in her eyes.

The camera's must have caught this as well or knew about what had happened at her house the previous night.

"C'mon, Alice, we haven't been to Victoria Secrets yet." I reminded her hoping to drop the subject.

As much as I disliked Theresa I didn't want to see her suffer, not here. Maybe she would get the idea and make some changes when she got home.

We went into Victoria Secrets only to have her stop us. "Rose, go ahead and pick out a few things, the rest of you, I don't think it's appropriate for you to be in there."

"I have one of their glamour bra's on right now." Alice argued.

"Ummm I think these are still our rules." I reminded her as Alice and I walked in the store with Rose. "Renesmee, you can wait out here with Theresa." I said ashamed I sacrificed my own daughter to buy a few bra's and panties.

The rest of the day seemed to be more disastrous. Every store we entered Theresa reminded us of our spending habits.

"Greed, one of the worst of the seven deadly sins." she repeated.

"And your family follows the holy virtue of charity." I replied catching her off guard. I am sure she would have never suspected me of reading Dante. "What about Pride? Or Wrath? Is your family not guilty of either of those." I continued realizing I shouldn't have brought up wrath. Would she know we suspect her husband of beating her.

"I'm getting tired." She whined "Can we go home?" I let out a sigh of relief I was again saved by Nessie.

I notice Alice have another vision as we drove home. I turned the radio up and started up a conversation with Theresa hoping to distract her and the cameramen from Alice's vision.


	15. Esme's Rules

EsPOV

Day seven:

"Well, I'm back from the hotel this morning." I said as the cameraman and I entered the empty house.

I came back to the house this morning to find the Barrett's at church. One more week, I reminded myself. There were very few human memories I had and most of them were not very pleasant. Seeing Tim raise a hand to me brought back all of those memories as well as a few I had repressed since changing. I turned my focus back to the present situation.

"Ironic isn't it." I mentioned to the camera showing them the note explaining they had gone to church.

I picked up a piece of paper and decided to evaluate my rules and how I was going to present them once more.

An hour or so later I heard the family approach. Tim entered with the kids behind him.

"Esme, I'm sorry for my behavior." He said approaching me.

As hard as it was to say I nodded my head and explained that I forgave him.

I explained to him I was too upset to eat while we sat in the kitchen while they ate. Obviously I didn't need to eat so I took this as an opportunity to put more guilt on him.

After lunch I asked them to join me in the living room.

"Tim, I understand that we live very different lives but I have never been treated the way you treated me the night before last." Okay it might not be completely true but in this life I had never been treated this way.

"I spent yesterday doing a lot of thinking about things I feel this family needs." I glanced over to the kids. "Kristi, Sean, you have way too much responsibility for children your age. Starting tomorrow, no extra curricular activities that you don't want to do."

"So no volunteer work?" Sean asked smiling.

"That's right, you can come home and do your homework and have some free time to do what you like."

"What about cheerleading? I have to be at practice!" Kristi exclaimed.

"And I have football!" Sean realized.

"If you want to continue that's fine." I said, I really didn't want to do anything to disrupt the children and what they seemed to enjoy.

"Jenny no ballet this week." I watched a smile form across her face. I had talked to her earlier this week and found out she didn't like doing ballet, she would rather be coloring or painting. "I enrolled us in a mommy and me art class." The smile on her face grew.

"Art? Don't you think that is a waste of time?" Tim asked I could tell he wasn't happy about the rules I had set for the others and this just upset him more.

"I decided we could free up our schedules a little more if Kristi drove her and Sean to school and practice."

Tim stood out of his chair and began yelling at me. "They can't be unsupervised all day!"

"Tim," I reminded him "They will have supervision at both school and practice you need to place some trust in them. Don't you realize Kristi will be in college next year? Loosen the reign a little, give her some responsibility she is a good kid. Show her you trust her."

He sat back down and crossed his arms across his chest. If he thought this was bad wait till he heard what I had for him.

"Since I will have more free time in the evenings I decided to take karate with Noah. Theresa spends so much time running the kids around but she doesn't actually spend quality time with them."

I noticed Noah seemed excited by the fact that we would be doing something together.

"Now as far as family rules, the computer is no longer going to be locked up. This does not mean to get into things that are not appropriate, but set up an email account talk to your friends."

"No!" Tim exclaimed again. "I am not having my kids bringing sexual predators into my house!"

I sighed beginning to become frustrated with him. If only he knew what type of predator he did let into his house.

"We don't really get to talk to people, I don't think I have any people I would consider good enough friends to talk to online." Kristi explained.

"Well then I think that we are going to have to arrange a party. I want each of you to invite ten people from school to come over on Wednesday."

"Absolutely not!" Tim was having a temper tantrum. "First of all we have Church on Wednesday and second it is a school night."

"Tell your friends to come over from six to ten. You can still be in bed at a decent time." I told them ignoring Tim.

"Now to the next rule. I bought you guys something. There will be a delivery truck bringing you a TV in the morning. Watch some MTV or something. Jenny and Noah, watch some cartoons." I said glancing over to Tim realizing his face was turning even redder.

"And along with the TV there is a PS3 coming." Sean was practically jumping up and down. He reminded me of Emmett with all his excitement.

"That's one of those video game things right?" Tim asked.

"Yeah dad, it's like so cool. I hear people talk about the games all the time." Sean was so excited and Tim only tried bringing him down.

"Those are the Devil's games." He said sharply.

"Okay, one more rule that applies to the family."

"I have stuck to your diet all week. As you have noticed it has made me sick all week." I said remembering all the times I couldn't hide my food and was forced to run to the bathroom bringing it back up.

"This week we are going to be vegetarians."

The kids all looked concerned with this rule. They could handle it for one week. It was Tim I was worried about.

"But I am hunting on Saturday. I can still hunt right? We need to eat after your gone and these stupid rules are finished." Tim said angrily.

"No, no hunting." I said smiling. I had to sneak out of a hotel window and run thirty miles to find somewhere to hunt last night. I didn't see that happening again so if I couldn't hunt neither could he.

I dismissed the kids for now, there were some things that Tim and I needed to talk about privately; or as privately as you could get on TV.

I smiled as they left the room hugging and thanking me for the rule change. If Tim was mad before this he was fuming now.

"Look, I know what I got myself into by doing this but I don't need people knowing everything about my personal life. What will people at work think, and the church congregation." he pleaded.

"Look, this show wasn't exactly my idea of a fun time either." I reminded him. I then reminded myself that Jasper and Emmett were going to pay for this when I got home.

"I called some places yesterday and found an AA meeting at a church not to far from here. You WILL go to those classes. Along with that I signed you up for anger management classes." I explained surprised by how calmly I was handling this conversation.

"Esme, please." Tim continued.

"Have you ever hit your wife?" I asked more bluntly than intended.

I watched as tears pooled in his eyes and he put his head in his hands. I sat down beside him.

"You don't understand what she's like." He whispered. "Don't get me wrong I love my wife, and I love God, but it is her that pushes the kids, that blocks them from the world, forces us to go to church."

Something in his voice sounded as if he was lying. It seemed as if this was a show for the camera's, it wasn't sincere.

"So that gives you the right to hit her?" I asked.

"No, it's just so hard." He said putting his hand on my leg.

I froze, maybe I was reading this wrong. Slowly his hand traveled up my leg as he placed his other hand on my shoulder slowly bringing it down to my chest.

I jumped up with probably a little more than human scream.

"Are you insane. You're sick!" I screamed at him making my way out of the room. The camera following right behind me.

"Get me back to the hotel now!" I snarled.

One of the assistants was on the phone calling for a cab.

"I have never been so disgusted by a person like this before!" I said almost shaking as I looked at the camera. "What really goes on in this house?"

The assistant came running back up to me and explained there would be a cab here in twenty minutes. He then asked me if I wanted to finish the show.

"Yes," I replied. "If there is anything I can do for this family I would like to try."

I can handle this I reminded myself who I was. If anything I could just kill him. I smiled to myself at the thought. Carlisle had very strong feelings towards hurting others but I think for Tim even he would make an exception.

I was back in my hotel room when the assistant knocked.

"I know this has been a hard day for you." He apologized "but I have your brother on the phone. He say's it's an emergency, your mother's passed away."

"What?" I asked in shock. Not over the fact that I had a newly discovered brother who was informing me that my mother passed away, she has been gone for eighty years; but who could it be calling?

I picked up his cell phone, "Hello?"


	16. Theresa's Rules

**Sorry, I had to repost this since justonepogostick was nice enough to inform me of a really big typo. **

**When Theresa is talking about Counseling I edited out her explaining to Emmett he was getting separate counseling for intimacy issues. **

**Next chapter up very soon.  
**

A/N: Short and simple and completely depressing, I still don't own the characters.

~Read~Review~Enjoy~

* * *

EPOV

Day Seven:

I sat across from Theresa, Bella to one side of me, Alice on the other. Jasper was at her side while Rose sat on Emmett's lap on a large recliner. Carlisle stood next to her as we waited for Nessie.

"Where's Renesmee?" Theresa asked. She had been thinking about if for the past ten minutes and was growing impatient.

"She was playing outside, she should be in soon. I told her we were doing the rule change this afternoon." Bella said.

We were stalling. I had over heard Theresa commenting on how Jake would no longer be allowed in the house. We were planning on letting Scruffy in for the nights but weren't sure Theresa would allow it; considering her last experience with Scruffy didn't go over so well. We decided to give them some time to hang out before he couldn't visit; in human form at least.

"I'll go get her." Bella said hopping up and running out the door.

I growled low enough only the undead could hear, Theresa's current thoughts were on what she was changing about Nessie's life. It was unfair, she didn't understand and I couldn't explain. My daughter is strong, she will get through this I reminded myself.

_A hand running up Esme's leg, another hand running over her chest._

I glimpsed into Alice's vision. I looked over to Alice she was visibly shaking as Jasper ignored Carlisle's rule and placed his hand around her shoulder.

I got up constantly reminding myself to go at human speed as I made my way out the door and headed directly through the woods. I stopped once I was certain I was far enough away from the house. I pulled my cell phone from my jeans and dialed 411 frantically trying to get a number to someone at ABC.

After calling eleven different numbers and being transferred fourteen times I prayed I wasn't too late. I was finally in touch with an assistant who had been following the Barrett's. I needed a story quick, luckily years of lying makes you quick to come up with a story.

I explained I was Esme's brother and our mother had passed away. It seemed like a good enough story to allow her contact with her family. The rules were strict about contacting each other but this excuse worked.

"Hello?" I heard Esme asks suspiciously. Her voice was weak, defeated, I had never heard her sound so depressed.

"Esme, are you okay?" I asked almost unable to talk. Anger surged through me, I could track her, find this family and kill him.

"Oh, E…" She stopped not wanting to use my name, the cameras were obviously on her.

"Esme, Alice saw…did he…? Esme was so much of a mom to me it hurt thinking of her going through something so repulsive.

"Don't worry about me. I will be okay. How's…dad? Does he know?" I took this to mean Carlisle and answered her.

"No."

"Please don't tell him just yet."

"But mom…" I think I heard her let out a sob when I called her that. It wasn't that I had never used the word before, she knew I loved her as a mother, this week has just been so hard on all of us.

"Don't tell him anything. Do you hear me? I need to stay here right now. I can take care of myself. You don't understand how much these people need help." She stopped realizing she may be saying too much in front of the Cameras.

I knew there was no changing her mind. I could only imagine what kind of life the kids in the other family had.

"I won't." I promised her.

"Thank you. I love you." she whispered.

"I love you too mom." I said hanging up the phone and heading back to the house.

"Sorry." I said as I entered the room. I was still upset about what was going on with Esme. I took a seat by Bella who was now sitting on the couch with Nessie and had seen me talking to her and respected Esme's wish not to inform Carlisle. Alice smiled and nodded letting me know everything would work out in the end.

I caught snippets of Theresa's thoughts and remembered we still had to hear her new rules.

Carlisle glanced over to Theresa and told her we were ready for her rules.

"This has been an um…interesting week. I want to go over individual rules first. Nessie, as the youngest I think you have been highly neglected. You are left on your own way too much. For the rest of the week you will be under my constant supervision."_Stupid Bitch_

I glanced over to Renesmee and made sure she knew that I was not going to tolerate that language.

_Sorry Daddy_

I watched as she looked over at Jake knowing he would be disappointed in her talking like that too.

This caught Theresa's attention too.

_I need to get rid of that boy._

We all knew this was coming. Nessie would make sure she would pay for getting rid of Jake.

"That brings me to my next rule for Nessie. You are far too young to be spending so much time with a man so much older than you."_This is so not fair!_

I smiled at Nessie if she only knew what her third rule was going to be.

"I think that is you queue to exit." She said to Jacob pointing at the door.

"Sure, Sure, Ness I'll see you later."

_Just wait until tomorrow_

I listened to Jake as he walked by me and winked.

"Okay now that one of our problems is taken care of I have one more rule to discuss with Renesmee."

I squeezed Bella's hand she wasn't going to like this.

"I don't know what happened last week but I get the impression you have the desire to have a child."

_I also think she wants it to be Jakes but this wouldn't be appropriate on national TV _.

"So," She continued "I have a little surprise for you." Theresa reached down into a large bag and pulled out a baby doll.

"This doll will indicate how well of a parent you would be. If it cries you need feed it, change it, or hold it. It will give me a computer read out of how well you are doing."

_What the hell is this, I don't want to have a kid. Stupid bitch, I was the baby she saw. I don't want kids yet. Daddy._

I saw Renesmee glance over at me looking for help. I just shrugged my shoulders. My little girl was growing too quickly as it was. Within the next two years her and Jake would most likely be dating. I was in no rush to have grandchildren.

Bella looked horrified as Nessie held the baby doll.

I felt her hand squeeze mine as she lifted her shield.

_Wow, she's really growing up. An image of Bella holding Nessie ran through her mind._

I smiled and gave her hand a reassuring squeeze.

"Now," Theresa continued. "Bella and Alice, I spoke with the school cheerleading coach. She said she would be happy to have you two join for a week. You can cheer on Jasper and Edward, the football coach said he would let them practice with the team. He can't promise you can play, from what I hear your schools doing pretty good this year; might make state. But if you guys are good enough maybe you could get a few minutes in the game."_We could show them how we play football. _

I looked over to Jasper as he winked at me.

_I wanted to play football. I got the right body type. I would make a good linebacker._

Was Emmett jealous? Seriously I would give anything to get out of this.

I crossed my arms over my chest showing my distaste in Theresa's new activity for us.

_Edward, your going to love Bella in her uniform. I can't wait to see Jasper in that football uniform, the way it shows off his cute ass…_

I looked over at Alice. She looked back at me and tried to change her thoughts, it wasn't working. We were all overstressed and undersexed.

Jasper picked up on Alice's emotions and sending waves of lust across the room.

Carlisle coughed in Jasper's direction hinting for him to stop before things got out of control.

"Emmett, Rose, I didn't forget about you two." Theresa said smiling. "Now I have told you I am okay with your marriage, which is true. You aren't my children and if your parents want to allow this kind of behavior as long as you had God's blessing that's fine with me."_Were off, She's not going to make us do anything embarrassing. Maybe Emmett's smarter then I give him credit for._

"I have however signed you two up for marriage counseling." Theresa continued as I watched Rose's smug grin disappear as she hit Emmett.

"See this is what I mean. You two don't communicate properly." Theresa went on.

_We needed this crazy woman to tell them they needed marriage counseling? I've been telling them that for half a century._

I smiled over at Carlisle. Obviously our thoughts were on the same wavelength.

"And Emmett," Theresa continued. "I have spoken with a separate counselor who may be able to help you get over some of your issues with intimacy."

We couldn't even stop from laughing. Before we knew it Jasper, Alice, Bella, Carlisle and I were laughing uncontrollably.

"Sorry," Carlisle said as he regained his composure. "Emmett that was inappropriate. I'm sorry.

_Wow, I said that with a straight face. _

I laughed at Carlisle's realization.

"Okay, if everyone is ready to listen to me." Theresa said pacing in front of us. "There are going to be some family rules as well. First of all we will eat dinner together as a family."

"Second we will all sit down and have a conversation on the importance of abstinence. Nessie, considering the way this family runs things I think it's important you attend. Bella, Jasper, I understand you two are single. Edward, I want that girlfriend of yours to come to this too."

Girlfriend? I glanced around the room nobody told me I had a girlfriend.

_Oh shit, I forgot…_

I looked to Rosalie and let her know she had better tell me what was going on.

_Well I thought she was getting suspicious of you and Bella so I told her you had a girlfriend. Ummm….you and Jessica are pretty hot and heavy._

Jessica, we were no longer in Forks but I knew who she was implying.

"Theresa, we have umm… departed ways." I informed her.

"Oh, Edward, I'm so sorry, I thought you really loved her." Bella giggled.

"Okay about the meeting." Theresa said getting us back on track. "It will be Wednesday evening after church.""Carlisle, you will make it home for dinner every night and you will join us for church. You come home and make rounds on your own children like you do at the hospital."

"Yes ma'am." Carlisle replied.

_I had better be here, who knows what the kids are going to get up to this week._

I smiled, poor Carlisle. We really were making his life miserable, we owed him big.

_Why hasn't she said it yet, I saw it…maybe she forgot._

I looked over to Alice a look of relief crossed her face.

"Two more rules." Theresa said "First of all, I am sick of this vegetarian diet. We are going to incorporate some meat into our diets, and I picked up some hunting gear so we can go hunting on Saturday."_I'll show her hunting._

Jasper smiled.

"Our families are open to new experiences." Carlisle told her trying to change the subject before we started making smart comments.

"Okay then I hope the next rule is as well accepted. I want you kids to learn what it's like to live without all your materialistic things. I was appalled when I saw how much you spend on clothing."

"I could agree with that." Carlisle nodded in agreement.

"Carlisle, that Burberry tie you're wearing cost $180." Alice screamed at him.

"And you bought it." Carlisle reminded Alice.

I chuckled at Alice's little act. She had seen this and decided to put up a big fight. In fact she had already decided on half of the new things she wanted to buy.

"This isn't fair!" Alice screamed stomping her feet.

"Oh, it's not just Alice." Theresa reminded us.

"Tomorrow after your practices you will come home you girls will go through your clothes. I want three garbage bags from each of you." Emmett laughed, Rose snarled at him. Alice was still stomping her feet sobbing.

"Emmett, you are not excused from this. I want you and Jasper to go through your games, there is no reason any one needs that many video games, I want this box filled with games." Theresa said handing them a box.

"Edward, don't think you were forgotten either. Here is a box." She said as I sat there looking at the box. "Fill this with some of those CD's and Records." She said coldly. Did she realize how rare some of those Records were.

Theresa stood looking smugly at us.

_I will straiten this family up. _

I chuckled at Theresa's thought, this was going to be a fun week.

Alice placed her hand over her mouth as I realized she was having another vision. I caught what was about to happen tomorrow. I smiled happily counting down the minutes until tomorrow.


	17. First day with new rules: Part 1

**A/N: Okay i am breaking this day up into three parts. Just too much for one chapter. Plus you readers get to read three times the amount of crazy happening in the Cullen household. **

**Hopefully you enjoy it.**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~ **

BPOV

"Bella, this isn't good." Alice said as we entered our room.

We had just gotten done with learning the new mom's rules and although Alice knew what most of the rules were before; I just figured that reality finally set in.

"It's one week Alice," I giggled at the look on her face. "You have an eternity to go shopping."

"No, Bella, that's not it."

I glanced up to Alice as I sat texting Edward on my phone.

"Bella, it's going to be sunny tomorrow."

I sat and thought for a moment. The whether channel had called for another cloudy rainy day…big surprise, that's why we live here. But I had come not to question the psychic.

"You know Alice for someone who can predict the future you didn't predict my solution to this." I said as I texted Edward.

"What do you mean?" Alice questioned upset that I had an idea she hadn't thought of.

I let her sit there focusing on it for a minute when the vision came to her.

I had decided that if Carlisle called the school in the morning explaining we had a family emergency they wouldn't call home and Theresa wouldn't know we skipped.

"Good one, but you forgot you and I are supposed to become cheerleaders."

"We just refuse. Let her yell at us tomorrow night. It's better than being exposed. We just leave for school early. We can leave twenty minutes early and still be somewhere safe before it gets too sunny." I explained.

"I'll send Carlisle a text letting him know he needs to call the school in the morning." Alice said pulling out her phone. "I better let Jazz know too."

"I'll inform Emmett and Rose." I didn't need to mention Edward. Since we have been apart we have spent most of the night texting each other.

It wasn't as good as hearing his voice but reading some of the things he planned to do to me was worth it. Poor Jasper, receiving dirty texts from Alice wasn't enough to relieve his reactions to the emotions radiating between our rooms.

The next morning we all made our way out of the house early telling Theresa we forgot we had to get ready for a pep rally that day. I don't know what was sadder, the fact Theresa thought we were going to a pep rally; or that deep down I think Alice wanted to go to one.

We all headed out to an area of the woods in which we normally hunt. We separated to hunt. Edward and I snagged a couple of Elk and after eating found a quiet field to lay in. I looked down at my sparkly marble god.

"What are you thinking?" he asked with his perfectly crooked grin.

"I'm not telling." I smiled as I turned to him.

"I could always make you." He pounced on top of me his lips instantly meeting mine.

"I could always show you." I whispered as our lips parted.

I placed my hands on his cheek and instantly we were back in our meadow. Since the change some of my human memories have become blurry but our first day in our meadow is one I will never forget.

"Hey Em, you owe me fifty." Our moment was quickly interrupted by Jasper.

"They bet on whether they were going to catch us in the act." Edward whispered in my ear.

"I told you not to bet him." Rose laughed at Emmett. "This is Edward were talking about."

"Well, you know since Bella's change he's been more um…active." Emmett replied.

"For your information we had wild crazy sex in that tree earlier." I said as I sat up and pointed at a tree on the north side of the field.

All of their jaws dropped.

Okay, it may have been a little lie but I learned long ago I had to step up to Emmett or he would trample all over mine and Edwards sex life.

"Okay then…we will all meet back up the house when school lets out." Alice said as she winked at me.

I waited to make sure the rest of the family had left and looked over to Edward.

"What tree was it again?" Edward grinned pulling me onto his back and running to the edge of the clearing jumping into the tree I had pointed to.

We arrived back at the house a little later than normal hoping that everyone else would arrive back before us and take the heat of the blame. Alice must have seen that one coming because Rose and Emmett were the only ones home. We walked in the door to see Theresa running up to us.

"Why aren't you guys at practice?" she screamed.

"Don't want to go." I said as I walked past her.

"Bella," She shrieked as I walked away.

I was thankful Edward stopped her. I stopped at the edge of the stairs and listened to their conversation.

"Theresa, please, I promise we will both go tomorrow. We had every intention of going, Bella was on her way to practice and over heard a couple of the other girls talking about her. She has some self esteem issues, she came and got me and asked to come home." I had never been more thankful for his acting abilities.

Theresa didn't sound amused. "Edward, she needs this because of her self esteem issues."

"I just got her to stop crying. You are going to make her go suicidal." Edward snarled at her.

"Oh please." Theresa said as she pushed past Edward.

"She's tried it before!"

"What?" It was the first time I heard real concern in Theresa's voice.

"A few years ago, her boyfriend left her, she was depressed." Edward explained.

I closed my eyes knowing the story that was coming. I know why Edward was doing this but thinking about that time in my life still hurt.

"She was upset there was some large cliffs where we used to live. She decided to jump."

"But she didn't?" Theresa asked.

"No, she did." Edward said quietly. "She almost drown, but she made it." "How can someone love someone so much they would die without them?" Theresa asked.

"Obviously you've never been in love." Edward said coarsely as he walked out of the room.

TPOV

He loves her; I realized. She's not good enough for him. He's talented and gorgeous, she's just an average little girl. I quickly pushed the thoughts out of my head. I would have time to talk to them tonight while they gave up some of their possessions.

I went back downstairs to check on Renesmee. She was sitting on a chair with the bassinet softly rocking next to her while she read a book. I glanced down at her feet; there was that damn dog.

"Renesmee, you can't have that mutt so close to the baby." I said debating if I should go over and drag him out of the house myself. Remembering my past experience with him I decided against it.

"He wouldn't hurt a fly." Renesmee replied bending down and scratching the tuff of his neck.

"Take him out NOW!" I demanded.

"Daddy said I could keep him inside. Were supposed to be getting a cold snap. You aren't that mean, making a poor defenseless animal sleep in the cold. " She was giving me those sad little puppy eyes that seemed to hypnotize me. "He stays out!" I demanded. I have been on top of this girl all day, there's no way she called Carlisle.

I swear there is something wrong with this dog. He whimpered at her, got up and walked over to the door. I opened it and watched as he walked out with his tail between his legs as if he understood.

I glanced over at the clock and realized it was about time to start dinner. I wanted these people to eat a good home cooked meal. Since I hadn't had time to hunt to stock up their freezer I settled on some large steaks I had found at the store. I was tempted to pick up some potatoes and vegetables but decided if they had that stuff they wouldn't eat the meat. Maybe tomorrow I would incorporate the meat with something to fit their pleasing.

I ran out to the garage to grab the bags and boxes for the kids to put their stuff in after dinner. Hopefully they would cooperate.

I was coming off as an evil witch and I sort of liked it. After being kept under Tim's watchful hand for so long I was enjoying being the one in charge.

I saw Alice's car pull into the garage and watched as she skipped into the house. Her uniform accented her attitude perfectly. Maybe she still had a chance at a normal life.

Jasper pulled a bag out of the trunk and approached the house.

"What's in the bag?" I asked.

"Clothes." He said paying me no attention.

"Didn't I tell her not to go shopping?" I said angrily.

"She didn't go, she had cheerleading practice." he replied.

"She didn't go to practice." I heard the cameraman explain to me.

"What?" I was in shock, first Bella now Alice.

"The crew following the kids said they went by to film some of the practice and none of them showed." he explained.

I was so angry I couldn't speak. I opened my mouth to start yelling and quickly felt strange. I was torn between emotions, half of me wanted to scream at him, the other half of me wanted to burst out in laughter.

The feelings of giddiness won and before I knew it I was bent over laughing hysterically. I turned away from the camera and looked over at Jasper. He smiled as he walked out of the garage.

It took me a moment to stop laughing; when I did I was completely disorientated. I looked around the garage, shrugged and made my way back into the house trying to figure out what just happened.

I was just finishing dinner when I heard Carlisle's car pull up. I set the table and called the kids down to eat.

"Gross…" Rose said as she sat down to the table and poked the steak with her fork.

"You all know I am opposed to the murder of innocent creatures." Carlisle said as the rest of the family sat down. "But what's done is done and I think we should all try to eat."

"I usually like my food a little rarer."

The whole table erupted in laughter. I looked over to Jasper. Did he just say he eats meat?

"I thought you were vegetarians?"

"Oh, we are now." Alice said. "But before we came live with Carlisle and Esme we weren't. Jasper had the hardest time becoming a vegetarian."

"So you forced your children to become vegetarians?" I asked Carlisle.

"No, he didn't force us." Edward snapped as he cut a piece of his steak.

"Sorry, Edwards views on vegetarianism are probably the closest to Carlisle's. He thinks living any other way would make him a monster." Bella explained.

Wow, these people sure had some strict views on the subject. There was something peculiar about how Bella phrased her comment but I shrugged it off when I noticed Renesmee had eaten most of her steak leaving only a small portion on the plate.

"Did you enjoy your dinner?" I asked her.

"It was okay." Her smile said differently; she had enjoyed it.

"But you aren't going to finish it?" I pointed to the remaining portion of steak.

"It's going to be cold, Scruffy is going to need some extra food to keep him warm." she explained looking at Carlisle.

"Oh please," Rose sneered "That dogs hot enough."

"Rose, I never knew you had a thing for mutts." Edward said as Bella and Emmett laughed.

"You know what I mean." Rose said as she stood up. "I have eaten some, may I now be excused?"

"Yes" I said not wanting to upset her anymore.

I had a feeling when I went up after dinner there would be enough complaining as they discarded some of their possessions.

"Here Nessie you can have some of my steak for Scruffy. I think I agree with Jasper I like my steak a little rarer." Emmett said following Rose out of the dining room.

"Ma'am I tried it, may I please be excused." Jasper said. I was so taken by his sweet comforting tone I didn't even notice he hadn't even cut it.

There was something about him, made me feel calm and relaxed. Sure he like the rest of them were gorgeous but he was different.

Alice who had eaten most of her dinner smiled and followed Jasper out of the room.

Edward and Bella to my surprise had quietly eaten most of their food and quietly excused themselves asking Nessie to come with them, almost like they knew I wanted a moment alone with Carlisle.

"You are a hypocrite. You know that. You force your children to eat this and you don't?" I couldn't believe his nerve.

"No, I did not force them I told them to try it. I didn't think any of them would actually eat it. It was their decision and I am making mine." He said taking his plate and putting it with the rest of the scraps that had been collected for Scruffy.

"I have come home when you asked, I will go to church with you, I will do devotions with you, I will spend more time with my family but I will not go against my beliefs." He said as he walked out of the room.

"Well, I guess it's time to teach these kids a thing or two about charity." I said grabbing my bags and boxes and went upstairs.


	18. First day with new rules: Part 2

**A/N: Okay, here's part two. Part three's almost done. **

**Thanks again for all the great reviews. It makes my day!**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

**Disclaimer: Oh and if you didn't realize this I don't own these characters. Well Theresa is my creation but I want nothing to do with that psycho Bitch :)  
**

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EPOV

"Edward, I brought a box up here, can I help you get rid of some of these CD's and records." I heard Theresa as she knocked on my door.

_It's okay Edward, let her have them I have a plan._

Carlisle nodded reassuringly as I opened the door for them.

I opened the door and started to grab some CD's. I tried not to grab anything that couldn't easily be found again at any Best Buy; but I was still frustrated. I loved my music collection because of how I was feeling at the time I bought it; the things that were happening when the songs came out.

I noticed Theresa flipping through some of my records.

"Some of these are real old." Theresa commented.

"The oldest I have is from 1910, it was my mothers, umm…passed down to her." I explained.

"Can I see it?"

Was she crazy she wanted me to get rid of stuff, I wasn't going to show her the one record I had that was actually my mothers.

"No." I said rather coldly.

I looked over my CD's as I tried to find a few more to get rid of. I decided on a few Bob Dylan, the Beatles, the Clash, Velvet Underground, and Elvis. All of these because I had the records these were just bought manly as doubles for my car.

"Mozart, Buddy Holly, Bach, Elvis, Debussy, The white album." I listened to Theresa run off names.

_How does this kid have this kind of music collection. Not only is he gorgeous and talented his taste in music is incredible. I was thinking he would have a bunch of rap and rock devil music._

"You have the white album? How?" She asked holding up the album in amazement.

I couldn't really explain to her I physically bought it, that I remembered the whole British invasion.

"My mothers." I said nonchalantly as I continued to look through my CD's. I smiled trying to imagine my mother listening to the Beatles, she really was open minded, she may have liked them. I was quickly saddened by the thoughts of my experiences that my parents had missed out on.

_The box? Am I really that cruel. This does feel good though._

"In the box." She said as she dropped it in the box. Just stood there and dropped it. "That records probably worth at least twenty five thousand!" I said not really worried about the money but hopefully she would realize how ridiculous it was to get rid of something so valuable.

"They can auction it off, use the money for other things." She said picking up my box and walked out of my room. Before she left she turned to Jasper. "Jasper, go down to the entertainment room with Emmett, I'll be down shortly to help you get rid of some of that stuff."

_It's okay, I have a plan. I may not agree with how much money you guys spend sometimes but this isn't right either._

I looked at Carlisle and smiled; hoping he would be able to make everything okay.

APOV

There was a knock at the door.

"Come in," I grumbled looking over at Bella.

I saw what happened to Edward and although I didn't see any problems with Carlisle's plan I still didn't want to part from my clothes if only till next week.

"I brought you each one bag. I want nice clothes in it. Clothes you would want to see someone else wearing."Bella and I just stared at her.

"Come on now!" Theresa said too enthusiastically. "This should make you feel better."

Bella walked over to the closet and grabbed her biggest winter Jacket. Not that she needed it anyway it was just a cover for humans.

"There my bag's almost full." She said shoving the large jacket into the bag.

I couldn't stop laughing, even Carlisle chuckled at her display.

"Carlisle, I don't think that's appropriate." Theresa said sternly.

"Sorry," he said still laughing. "You have to give her credit for creativity though."

"Good idea Bella it's cold out, these people probably need jackets." I said going over to the closet and getting my identical jacket and placing it in the bag.

"Alice." Carlisle said. I think he was trying to reprimand me but it was hidden by his laughter.

Theresa had had enough she pushed through and walked into my closet. If only she knew most of Bella's clothes were hidden in the attic; that this was mostly all mine.

"Let's just get this done." Bella whispered to me low enough the humans wouldn't catch it.

This bitch wants me to get rid of clothes, and I can't even go out shopping to replace them. No way was I going down without a fight.

I watched as Bella put what clothes she did have in my closet into the bag. Walked out of the closet and set the bag down at Theresa's feet.

"How about this?" Theresa said picking up the dress I had worn during one of Rose and Emmett's weddings. Sure it was a style I had hoped would never come back, shoulder pads were the worst fashion mistake of the eighty's but I couldn't get rid of it.

"No, I need that for eighty's parties." I said thankful that people still celebrated the eighty's.

She flipped through more and more dresses probably wondering why I had clothes from so many different time periods.

The dress from Edward and Bella's wedding? No. The dress from a Prom I forced Jasper to take me to in the sixties? No. Then she found it, my wedding dress.

"Why do you need this?" she asked.

"It was my mother's I want to wear it someday." I quickly lied.

"Carlisle, don't you have a problem with these kids hanging onto their past? You're their parents now. Maybe they would listen a little more if they really felt that way." She said staring at Carlisle.

"No, I think it's their past that has made them what they are." He said sternly letting her know it was time to drop the subject.

"Put it in the bag." She ordered me.

"NO!" I said gripping onto the dress. She reached out and pulled the dress back from me. I could feel the seams pulling. I let go knowing if I didn't it would rip.

I watched as she took the dress crumpled it up and shoved it in the bag. If I could cry I would.

Carlisle walked over to me and placed his hand on my shoulder.

"It will be okay." he promised.

I knew his plan would work but I couldn't help but be upset by the way she was treating us.

NPOV

This is ridiculous I thought holding my baby that I named Kadidu; and nicknamed Kaddi. After the Quileute word for Dog. Yes I realize Jake isn't a dog but the name for wolf isn't as pretty. Theresa is the only one that I told about her name, well I just told her the name not the meaning.

I try not to think of it when I am around daddy, and although mommy spent time on the reservation I don't think that she picked up any of the language.

Jake hadn't heard the name yet and I hope he doesn't think I want his baby. Not now at least. I guess my feelings are that of a normal twelve year old or so, but it's hard when Jake see's me so differently. I sat there questioning my future with him, wondering if and how he will ever see me as anything but a little girl when Theresa knocked on the door.

"Come in." I whispered not wanting this baby to start crying.

"Renesmee, like the others I want you to donate some of your clothes to the homeless shelter." She said putting a bag on my bed.

"Shhh…" I said motioning down to the baby. "All day you have criticized my parenting abilities. Which you should since I am ten! But now you want me to stop and do this for you."

She didn't say anything.

"Make up your mind!" I said a little too loudly the next thing I knew the baby was crying.

"I'll take her." grandpa said coming over to the side of my bed.

"No, she wouldn't even let me shower earlier. Let her go get the clothes. I don't care. Alice is just going to take me shopping next week." I said kicking the bag off the side of the bed to her feet.

I trusted Alice's vision and I knew grandpa would take care of anything. I could live without that stuff till next week.

That is until I saw her grab it.

"I need that!" I said hoping that she would stop and put the sweatshirt back on the hanger.

"This old Sweatshirt?" she asked holding up. "What special meaning does it have for you?"

I looked at the QHS track sweatshirt that Jake had given me one cold night. It was probably three sizes too big but it was his and I loved it.

"It was my brothers." Oh shit. Now I had a brother. I looked over at grandpa hoping he would rescue me.

"She had a brother in high school when her parents died. He ended his life after they passed." With one arm holding little Kaddi he placed his other hand on my shoulder. Three hundred years could make you a kick ass liar.

Theresa considered this for a moment and stuck the sweatshirt in the bag.

Grandpa just gave her this sob story about my dead brother, sure he was fake but she didn't know that. How heartless could this woman get.

With that my bag was full she left my room.

"Sorry." Grandpa whispered as he followed behind her.

EmPOV

"This sucks." I said as Jasper and I sifted through our games. We had come to the decision to put stuff in the box and be done with it before she got to us. The camera watched as we threw games in the box complaining about what an evil heartless bitch Theresa was.

Although we knew Carlisle was going to assure everything was safely returned it was still fun to complain about her on camera.

"You guys did this without me?" She asked.

I didn't have to be Jazz to know she was getting angry with us. Maybe Jasper can just mess with her emotions again. I wish I could have been their to see that earlier.

"Sorry, we just wanted to get this done with." Jasper answered.

"Yeah, it's not like we can't just go buy them again once you leave. This doesn't really bother us." I laughed as we walked out of the room.

"Give me your keys." I turned in shock. She wasn't talking to me was she?

"Excuse me?" I said completely confused.

"You heard me. If this doesn't bother you lets see how not having your Jeep will bother you." She said coldly.

"What? I need that to get to school. Besides you can't donate my truck." She couldn't do this to me.

"You can ride in Rose's car."

"Yeah, cause a BMW M30 isn't extravagant. We are better off with my Jeep."

"No, I think your right."

Yes, I get to keep the Jeep. But Rose is going to kill me, I got her car taken away from her. Damned if I do damned if I don't huh.

"I think you two can ride the bus." she said laughing.

I turned over to Jasper who was laughing as well.

"You ride in a damn Porsche everyday." I said hoping she would take away Alice's car. If I was going to be screwed I was taking my brother's and sisters down with me.

"Alice didn't purchase her car. That was a gift. It would be rather rude to turn down such a generous gift." Jasper smirked.

"A gift? Who the hell buys a teen a Porsche for a gift?" Theresa was confused.

"She saved a friend of the families life. They bought it in appreciation." Carlisle said validating what Jasper had just said.

"Alice can keep her car, Emmett you and Rose are taking the bus." she said walking out of the room.

"What about Edward?" I called out.

"He drives a Volvo, I hardly find that as extravagant." She said as she continued to walk out of the room.

Damn Volvo, I ran up to Rose. I knew she would be pissed but maybe she would take some pity on me. She likes her car but I LOVE my Jeep.

"Damn bitch wiped out my closet." Rose said as I entered the room.

Maybe this wasn't a good time to tell her about the car.

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**Hmmm...How are they getting their stuff back? Da Da Dum...Tune in later for the next chapter! ;)**


	19. First day with new rules: Part 3

A/N: Okay last part of a long day for the Cullens.

I still own nothing.

~Read~Review~Enjoy~

EPOV

After enduring having our possessions taken away we were forced to sit and listen to her devotion. I simply closed my eyes and imagined the music I would compose later tonight; thankful she didn't expect any of us to join in the first day.

"Daddy." I heard Nessie's voice as we headed out of the room. I turned to answer her and was quickly reminded of the amount of explaining I would have to do if anyone was to find out she was my daughter. It hurt to hear someone else answer her, I loved Carlisle and he was a father to all of us but this was my little girl.

I snapped back to reality and listened in to their conversation. She was pleading with Carlisle to allow Jake aka Scruffy to spend the night in the house.

_What do you think Edward._

Carlisle glanced over at me, I nodded my approval thankful he sought my opinion regarding my daughter.

After saying goodnight to everyone I headed upstairs. I stopped by Nessie's room and watched as she 'fed' the baby with the little plastic bottle. Bella was sitting on the other edge of the bed she looked up at me and smiled.

She wasn't supposed to be enjoying this. I wanted her to see how hard having a child is. Not that raising Nessie has ever been hard. She has always been more mature and well behaved than an average child, still this isn't what I expected.

"So, what's her name?" I asked.

"I never thought of naming it." Bella smiled as I realized she wasn't putting as much thought into this. Then again she was probably waiting till the day she would be a grandma.

"Kadidu Elizabeth" Nessie said smiling at the doll.

"Where did you come up with that?" I asked

"Oh, I googled it." she said. "It's a Quileute name."

"What does it mean?" I asked her thoughts were jumbled she was obviously trying to hide something.

_Edward, the cameras_

I turned around to see Scruffy.

_I think it's time to go to bed._

Jake obviously knew it's meaning. I said goodnight to my girls and said goodnight wishing I could give them both a kiss before leaving them for the night.

"C'mon mutt." I said patting him on top of the head.

"Oh Edward, I thought Scruffy could sleep with me." Bella giggled knowing that would get a rise out of me.

I smiled when even Scruffy growled at the idea.

I smiled and waved goodnight to the camera and closed the door.

"Okay mutt, what's this name mean?" I whispered to Jake.

_Kadidu, it's Quileute for Dog._

"So my fake plastic grandbaby's name is dog?" I said as things began to hit me.

_I swear Edward, I am just as confused as you. Probably more. She's growing too quickly. She is becoming a teenager, her hormones are changing and I can tell she is starting to see me…to see us differently._

I growled at him, at these thoughts. It wasn't his fault, well yes, he did imprint on my newborn, but so far he's been respectful.

"So, I think the plan backfired." I said as I sat on the side of the bed staring at Jake.

_Can I tell you something…don't be mad. Oh God, he's gonna be mad…Don't think. I've never been able to block him…_

I thought about letting him go on suffering a few more minutes then decided I had enough drama for the day.

"Spit it out." I said laughing. Obviously he couldn't talk but he got the idea.

_I like it. I like seeing her with a baby. _

I growled.

_Let me finish. I have never fully thought of us having a family. She's going to be a good mom. _

Jake really surprised me, he's really grown up. I thought back to the thoughts I he had had of Bella while we were together. The thoughts he had had towards me and the rest of my family before Renesmee was born. I noticed how much Nessie had changed him; how much he loved her.

_Why isn't he saying anything. Oh God he is going to kill me. Edward think of Nessie!_

"I was just thinking of what a good friend and son you have been to me."

_What?_

I smiled at his reaction.

"Aww… did I miss that Hallmark moment?" Jasper laughed as he entered the room.

"Everyone's in their rooms now. Theresa is downstairs lecturing Carlisle over our non participation in sports today. Let's save him." Jasper said grabbing his phone.

CPOV

"I just don't think they are going to have the social skills to make it in the world." Theresa was explaining to me. Why hadn't Jasper paged me yet. Were they upstairs enjoying my suffering?

I was getting ready to explain to Theresa my kids seemed to manage okay. Granted I couldn't tell her they had been repeating high school for the past sixty years on and off.

Beep Beep Beep

I quickly grabbed my phone.

"It's the hospital, excuse me while I go call them back."

I exited the room and entered my bedroom while I had a completely fake one-sided conversation in front of the camera.

"I'm sorry." I apologized to Theresa. "I am needed at the hospital." I grabbed my keys and made my way out the door.

I had convinced Theresa of the best homeless shelter to drop off the clothing to. It was the best because the drop off area was never attended and there were no security cameras. In fact things were hardly dropped off there. I opened the car door.

"Emmett?" I looked into the car wondering what the hell he was doing in my car.

"Alice told me to come." He replied. Alice must have seen something. Maybe I would need some help moving this stuff.

We reached the drop off area at the back of a building that at one point had been a thrift store. I had made sure to hide the boxes behind some plywood explaining to Theresa that the staff would find it while people walking by would not.

Emmett and I quickly loaded the boxes and bags into the trunk. Things went smoothly as we headed to the storage rental unit I had rented out. We loaded things into the storage unit. I was thankful that nothing was taken I would have felt terrible for allowing it.

"So why do you think I came?" Emmett asked.

"We'll have to check with Alice." I said curious myself.

I dropped Emmett off a little ways away from the house figuring he could use a window so the camera crew didn't get suspicious.

I went back in to the house to find Theresa sleeping. I pulled a book from my study and receded to my bedroom.

EmPOV

"So Alice, why did I go last night?" I asked as I passed Alice making her way to the bathroom for a 'human moment' as we had all learned to do recently.

"Because you don't know how to shut up." She said smiling as she shut the bathroom door on me.

Rose, I had forgotten. Well not really but enough. Alice was saving my butt and probably everyone else who would hear a lot of yelling when she sent me with Carlisle.

"We ready to go?" I called up the stairs.

"We got a little time." She called back probably giving herself one more once-over in the mirror.

"No sweetie, we need to leave early.""Why?" Rose said although I could hear she still hadn't came out of the room.

"Ummm….because we have to catch the bus this morning." I had already started running as I finished the sentence.

I could hear her flying down the stairs. It wasn't until she had pounced on me digging her nails into my back that we remembered the cameras.


	20. Adrenaline Rushes and School Busses

**A/N: Thanks again for all the positive reviews. I'm glad people are enjoying the story.  
**

**Disclaimer: If you thought I owned these characters, I'm sorry you were mistaken. I only own Edward in my dreams.**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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TPOV

What the hell just happened here. I stared down at Rosalie who was sitting on top of Emmett's back. These kids sure did need therapy, good thing they are going tonight.

"What just happened here? How did you move like that? Rose, what? I couldn't even form complete thoughts.

They both stared back at me, Rose finally getting off of Emmett's back as they stood up. At the top of the stairs the rest of the kids looked down on them angrily.

"Ummm…I had an adrenaline rush." Rose said smiling at me.

I could hear Bella and Edward laughing hysterically.

I glanced over at the two of them suspiciously.

"Yeah, an adrenaline rush." Emmett repeated. "You can Google it." he said grabbing Rosalie's hand and pulling her out the door.

Even after they walked out the door the laughter from upstairs hadn't stopped.

"Inside Joke." Bella smiled as they all walked out the door.

EmPOV

"You what?" Rose asked slapping me in the chest after I explained to her how we no longer had our cars.

"Cameras" I whispered hoping having the camera crew following us to the bus stop would save us.

"Oh, I don't care about that." She snapped as she hit me on the shoulder. "Because of your dumb ass I have to ride a school bus? A fucking school bus!"

Wow, sometimes I think I do things to make her mad just to see her yell at me. Talk about hot.

"Don't give me that look!" she said still yelling.

"What look?" I decided to play stupid.

"That 'I want to fuck you right here' look." She said quickening her pace.

I decided that with the camera's there it was best to keep quiet.

We finally reached the bus stop and thankfully nobody was there. We stood there waiting, Rose refusing to turn towards me. So I stood their and admired the view from behind.

I heard a car approach and turned to see Edwards Volvo slow down he rolled the window down as he and Bella laughed at us before hitting the gas leaving us in the dust.

Luckily, or unluckily the school bus pulled off the road, I made a reach for Rose's hand as the blinking stop sign went out and the doors opened. She ignored me and quickly entered the bus.

Oh man, this is hell I thought as I looked to the back of the bus. There was only one seat available two seats back. Rose sat down and I took my place next to her.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"Sitting down next to my wife." I replied a small smile forming on my face.

"Not here."

"Rosie, baby," I said putting my hand on her leg. "Do you want me to go sit next to one of those other human girls?" I whispered as my hand crept further up her thigh.

She put her hand on mine and turned towards me as our lips met. Rose was quickly on my lap and I knew I was forgiven for the moment.

"Ahem. Excuse me, new kids." the bus driver began talking.

"Ummm…" I felt a hand tap my shoulder as the girl behind me pointed up at the driver.

"No public displays of affection." She said sternly looking into the mirror.

"It's okay, she's my wife." I said wrapping my arms around my wife.

The whole bus filled with whispers.

"Not on my bus." the driver said getting more upset. "You two, don't leave the bus without seeing me first."

When we arrived to school we found we were suspended from the bus for three days. I explained to Rose that I was the one who initiated our little session on the bus therefore should be forgiven for the whole car thing.

NPOV

"Nessie, time to wake up, you should have been up by now." I heard Theresa calling from outside the door.

I put a pillow over my head; this baby was keeping me up all night. Everyone laughing this morning woke her up and I had just gotten her back to sleep.

I heard my door open as Theresa approached my bed. "Renesmee, you need to get up for school"

"Shhh…" I said pointing at the bassinet.

I heard her sigh and go back out of the room.

A familiar smell came heading into the room. I lifted my head up to be pounced on by Scruffy.

"Okay, I get the idea, I'm getting up." I smiled. Looking up I noticed a note shoved into his mouth.

I took it quickly and looked for the cameras; the coast was clear.

_Nessie,_

_Well, now I see why you were asking about the Quileute term for dog. _

_You know I love you, well, you know. But you don't seriously want a baby right now do you?_

I stopped reading and looked at Jake.

"No," I whispered. "I didn't sleep all night. I look like hell." I looked back down at the letter.

_Things are getting more complicated for us. I want us to talk before anything gets awkward. _

_Whatever your feeling just tell me. Please.  
_

_Jake  
_

I could feel tears forming in my eyes. I looked over at Jake.

"I don't want babies now. I just want to be, to grow up, have fun, and most of all play with my best friend." I whispered.

"Renesmee what ever your middle name is Cullen, get down stairs now." I heard Theresa scream.

I drug myself out of bed, picked Kaddi up and made my way downstairs.

"Carlie" I said as I entered the kitchen.

"What?" Theresa asked.

"My middle name. If you want to yell at me get my name right." I said as she looked at me shocked.

Saved by the bell I thought as the phone rang.

TPOV

"Hello, Cullen residence." I said as I answered the phone.

"Yes, is this Mrs. Cullen?" The voice on the other side asked.

"No, this is Theresa Barrett. We're doing wife swap I am filling in for her.""In that case this is Ms. Jordan at the high school. I am calling to notify you that you will need to pick up Emmett Cullen and Rosalie Hale. Oh, or is it Cullen now. I hear they got married?""Wait?" I asked completely frustrated. "Why am I picking them up?"

"I'm sorry but they have been suspended from the bus." Ms. Jordan explained. "From what I hear showing a little to much PDA."

"Thank you very much." I said as I hung up the phone.

Thank God those two have counseling tonight. When I told Emmett I wanted him to work on his intimacy issues I didn't mean on the bus.

The rest of the day passed slowly, I helped Nessie with her homework, all supervised and gave her some parenting tips. I was surprised she gave me very little attitude, that is until I had to go get the kids from school.

"Nessie, can you come with me to get Emmett and Rosalie from school.""No, I'm sorry I can't."

"Why?" I asked wondering why she was talking back to me after the day had gone so well.

"Well you see, you have been giving me parenting advice all day and I have been trying to be a good mother. But I can't get in the car without a car seat for Kadidu. Even I know that would be irresponsible." She said smiling.

"It's a plastic doll." I was yelling at her.

"Then why do I have to wake up at two in the morning to feed her?" She shot back.

I grabbed my purse and decided I was fighting a loosing battle. "I have to take your brother and sister to marriage counseling after school so I won't be home till a little later." I said walking out the door. I decided the cameraman could direct me since he had been there previously.


	21. Esme's POV

**A/N: Okay back to Esme's POV. I love Esme, but writing about her in this family has proven to be a little difficult. **

**Hopefully this chapter isn't too horrible.**

**Next Chapter we get to go to marriage counseling with Emmett and Rosalie! YAY!**

**Oh, and by the way, I still don't own any of these characters.**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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EsPOV

Tuesday Morning:

I heard a knock on my hotel room door. I opened it hoping that the producers had made a decision. Sunday after rule change and being sexually assaulted by Tim I came strait back to my hotel room. I didn't see the family yesterday while the producers decided whether or not to allow me back around Tim.

I kept explaining to them that I could handle myself, that I would not let him tear me down that much.

"Esme," I opened the door and saw Nick, one of the assistant producers who had been helping me. "We've made a decision I hope everyone can agree with,"

"Nick, thank you." I said not even hearing what they decided. I felt bad for all the time and effort they had to put into working with Tim.

"You didn't even hear it." he laughed.

"Okay, what is it?"

"Well, Tim is already taking them to school, but he has agreed to let you pick them up from school and stay with them until he gets home from his meetings this week." Nick explained.

"So I won't be alone with him, correct?" I asked more worried about his safety than mine.

"That's right." he nodded.

I drove over to the school thankful to get out of the hotel room. I reminded myself to stop by a store and pick up a few books for the next couple days.

"Hi Esme." Jenny and Noah said entering the car.

"Why didn't you come see us yesterday?" Noah asked.

"She doesn't like daddy either." I heard Jenny whisper very quietly. I'm sure it was meant for no one to hear.

"I had some stuff to do yesterday. I'm sorry."

I wanted to dig deeper find out what Jenny meant, had he hurt her?

I decided now wasn't the time to say anything let me talk to the older kids first. I got to the high school and smiled when I found out Kristi and Sean were happy to see me.

The drive home was silent, I caught Kristi's occasional glance towards me and realized maybe she was ready to talk.

I let Jenny and Noah watch some TV, to my surprise they had never seen sponge bob. Nessie loved sponge bob. Don't all kids?

Sean was in his room playing with the new PSP that I had gotten for him, so I decided to take some time to talk to Kristi.

"Kristi" I knocked on her door.

"Come in." I could hear the hesitation in her voice.

I glanced over to the camera that was following me into the room.

"Can we do this in private?" I asked.

"Hey, I wish that we could but as it is we barely have any footage of the rule changes." the cameraman shrugged his shoulders and followed me into the room.

I saw the disappointment in Kristi's eyes and mouthed sorry to her as I sat down on the side of the bed.

"How was school?" I asked opening up the conversation.

"Can we cut the crap Esme?" she replied flatly. "I know what my father is. I know how he treats my mother and I don't want to be next. Do you think he wanted to be on this show? She threatened him with divorce if he didn't come on the show. She was hoping to get a mom like you, someone that would see what he's like."

I didn't say anything I just sat there waiting for her to continue.

"She should have know he would hurt you too. I never wanted you to get hurt." Kristi began crying.

"Sweetie; This has nothing to do with you." I reassured her running my hand through her hair.

"I'll be right back." I promised as I queued the camera to follow me.

Kristi needed some alone time and I needed some time to think things through.

"Can we call the cops? Children and family services or something?" I asked.

"Esme, this isn't our place to say anything." Nick explained once we were off camera.

This family, these kids were suffering. I couldn't stand being so helpless. Tim would be home from his AA meeting shortly, the kids would be fine for now.

I got in my car and headed back to the hotel.

After the camera's followed me through the room for a few minutes as I heated a TV dinner in the microwave I asked them to allow me to have my dinner in peace. At about three a.m. I walked out to get some ice using it as an excuse to check where the camera's were. I made it a quarter of the way down the hall when the next door over opened and the cameraman, camera less at the time came out to check on me.

"Just getting ice. Couldn't sleep." I smiled.

Good, they could hear me if I left. I crept back to my room, turned the TV volume up and put the do not disturb sign on the outside of my door.

I then slowly slid open the window and quickly made my way towards the Barrett house.

I stopped in the back yard and listened carefully; everyone was sleeping.

I climbed up to Tim's window and slowly crept in. AA did him good, I could smell the alcohol running though his veins. My anger intensified as I approached his bed.

I lowered myself over him, placed my hand over his mouth. Suddenly his eyes widened and I could feel him struggling to get up.

"Don't you dare lay another finger on your wife. And if I ever find out you touched one hair on any of your children I will destroy you." I snarled at him.

I could hear his pulse quicken, saw the fear in his eyes. I quickly made my way back out the window and returned to my hotel room.

Not twenty minutes later I received a knock on my door.

I threw on my robe and opened the door rubbing my eyes giving them the impression I had just been woken.

Nick was on the phone. "I told you she was here. Why are you letting that drunk bastard get you upset? Okay fine, I'll ask her, if anything it will make for good TV."

I looked at him blankly although I knew what was coming.

"Esme, you didn't happen to climb into Tim's window a half an hour ago and threaten him did you?"

I tried to look confused and then just started laughing.

"I told you." Nick said angrily. "Now let that drunk sleep it off and go to sleep." he said slamming his phone shut.

"Esme, I'm sorry. Tim woke up our crew over there a little while ago and told them that you had come in through his window and threatened him." he explained. "I'm sorry to have had to wake you up."

"I'm sure I could find a few words to say to him, but no, sorry, no climbing into peoples windows for me." I laughed.


	22. Marriage Counseling

**A/N: I own none of these characters, only the strange things I make them do. **

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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EmPOV

"Do you want me to come up with you?" Theresa asked as she pulled up in front of the hospital. I wondered if Carlisle knew that she scheduled our therapy in the offices' attached to the hospital he works at.

"NO!" Rose and I said in unison as we got out of the car.

"I'll be back to get you in two hours." She called back to us.

"No, Carlisle can give us a ride home." I assured her.

We ran by the front desk and asked the receptionist to pass the message on to Carlisle. Once we got into the waiting room Rose picked up a magazine as the Doctor's receptionist called for me to come back first. I looked back at Rose giggling as I went back to his office; the camera's right behind me.

"Emmett, it's nice to meet you. I'm Dr. Young." The doctor said as he stood and greeted me.

"Yeah, hi." I said embarrassed to be here.

"I see your father occasionally. He never mentioned you getting married or having any problems. I'm glad you decided to come get some help." He continued embarrassing me even more.

"Well, um…I didn't realize I had any problems. You see my father got us involved in this wife swap thing, and our new mom thinks that Rose and I need counseling." I explained.

"I see." He said sounding very much like a therapist. "What I have written here is that YOU are having problems expressing yourself physically with your wife. Is that correct?"

"No, that is not correct." I said upset my masculinity was being questioned.

"Oh, I'm sorry." Dr. Young apologized flipping through the papers he had gathered to make my chart "I was told you were having intimacy issues and assumed that it was physical. So you are able to get an erection?"

"Yes!" I screamed wanting more than anything for this appointment to be over.

"You're sure there is nothing you want to talk to me about before we bring your wife in here? If you are having problems it may be caused by something else. There is some blood work that we could do, run some tests?" He asked.

Yeah, lets do some blood work I laughed to myself.

"No, there are no physical problems." I assured him, this time a little more calmly.

Dr. Young called his receptionist and asked for her to send Rosalie in.

Rose walked in the room with a big smile on her face; I knew she could hear every word of our conversation. Damn vamp hearing.

"Good afternoon Rosalie. I am Dr. Young." He said reaching out to shake her hand.

"Nice to meet you." Rose said sitting down in the chair next to me.

"Well Rose, is there anywhere you would like to start?" he asked.

I saw Roses smile fade and knew she was about to put on an Oscar winning performance.

"Well doctor, I feel as though Emmett doesn't find me attractive." She said sadly putting her head down.

"Baby, you know I think your beautiful, just thinking about you I…" I was interrupted by Dr. Young.

"We are giving Rose time to talk." he explained. "Rosalie, can you please explain why you feel this way?"

"It's just that" she paused and looked at me "the other night, we were starting to you know, and all of a sudden he just snapped, he couldn't be near me. I thought maybe it was because he couldn't get an erection but then he made me cover myself up as well."

"That was Jasper!" I yelled and then quickly remembered the camera filming all of this.

"And who is Jasper?" Dr. Young asked looking more confused.

"My brother." Rose snapped. "Emmett tried blaming him for his inability to perform and loss of interest in me the other night.

"Rose this isn't fair." I said trying to contain myself in my seat.

"And this brother is also adopted is that correct?" he asked.

"Yes, but he is my biological brother." Rose answered.

"Emmett, do you have feelings for Jasper?" Dr. Young asked turning towards me

"No, no, he just…" I tried to explain. Now the man thinks I am gay. How could I explain Jasper's talent. "He likes to manipulate me." I said proud that I had come up with a good way to describe his ability without adding to suspicion.

"So how does he manipulate you?" Dr. Young was not going to let this go.

"He just gets in my head." I said hoping he would drop the subject.

"So he taunts you?" the doctor said looking even more confused.

"Yes."

"Does he do this while you and Rosalie are spending umm…private time together?"

"Yes!" I was getting more frustrated now.

"You need me to get Jazz to calm you down?" I heard Rosalie whisper inaudible for the humans.

"Rose." I snapped in response to her comment but of course I was the only one who had heard it, making me look crazier. This was not looking good.

"Can we please change the subject." I asked Dr. Young.

"No, I think this may be the root of our problems." he replied. "Emmett what happens to you physically when your with Jasper.""What?" Wait, he thinks Jasper and I? Oh shit.

"What aren't you telling me." Rose said as she put her hand on mine. "It's okay baby, I'll understand."

"Rosalie, your being very understanding, did you have your suspicions before this?" Dr, Young asked sympathetically.

"Well, they do go out camping alone together." She turned facing me.

"Emmett, I love you and I only want to see you happy. If Jasper makes you happy let him know." Rose winked at me.

It was only going to get worse. This was her payback for the whole bus incident this morning.

"I'm not gay!" I exclaimed. Rose was going to pay for this.

"Emmett, do you have something against homosexuals?" Dr. Young asked.

"No," shocked I answered. "In fact I thought my brother might be gay up until a few years ago, I still loved him."

"So what made you change your mind about Jasper?" he asked.

"Jasper?" I asked. "Oh, no, I'm talking about my brother Edward."

"That's right I forgot Dr. Cullen's got all kinds of kids." he said rather inappropriately. I think he was loosing his patience with us.

"Emmett, I am going to ask you one more time and I want you to be completely honest with not only us but yourself. Are you gay?" Dr. Young asked.

"No," I turned and took Roses hand in mine. "Rosalie, I love you. You know I'm not gay. I can't get through the day without holding you, touching you," I said putting my hand on her waist. She jumped up sat on my lap and kissed me passionately.

"I have a little exercise I would like us to try." Dr. Young interrupted us. I watched as he walked to the other sided of the office and pulled out two puppets.

"Here you go." He said handing me a bear puppet.

"And for you." He said handing Rose a dog puppet. She looked at it with disgust and I just started to laugh.

"Is something wrong?" Dr. Young asked us.

"Can't I just hit him with one of those foam bats or something? I think I've seen that in movies before, you know let out some of my anger." Rose said still staring at the dog.

"This is an exercise in communication. I want you to use the puppets to tell each other how you feel." Dr. Young explained.

"Okay," Rose said waving the puppet around on her hand. "I think this is stupid."

"Oh, sweetie," I said moving my bear puppet towards hers making it try to give her a hug.

"STOP!" I almost jumped when Dr. Young yelled.

Were doctors supposed to get this upset? I glanced over to Rose as we both sat there and listening to him.

"You two wanted to get married right?" We nodded our heads.

"You two want to grow up, become adults right?" Again we silently nodded our heads although we were probably old enough to be this guys grandfather.

"You two want to become responsible, finish school?" I was getting frustrated but I knew we had probably sent this poor therapist over the edge.

"You two want to grow up, start a family right?" I started to nod and looked over to Rose as she tensed up. I reached over and placed my hand on hers.

"Is something wrong?" Dr. Young had been quick to pick up on the tension in the room.

"We don't want to discuss having children right now." I quickly explained hoping he wouldn't delve deeper into the topic.

For once he thankfully didn't push the issue.

"Let's talk about communication." He suggested changing the subject.

"What do you mean communication. She says something I do it." I said smiling. I was relieved to look over and see my Rose smiling.

"Very smart." Dr. Young said smiling. "However, that will only last so long. Within a few years problems will start to arise."

I thought about that and laughed. Okay again maybe a little inappropriate but we have been together at least twice as long as this guy's been alive.

The doctor didn't say anything he just sat there studying us. I hadn't realized how much time had passed until his phone rang and his receptionist informed us that Carlisle was out in the waiting room. "Send him in." Dr. Young said hanging up the phone.

Carlisle entered the room and I saw the look in his eyes. It was a look I knew too well, it was the 'you better not have embarrassed me' look.

"So, how did it go?" he asked after they exchanged greetings.

"Well, I picked up some subtle signs that they truly are in love, they are still young, give them some time and I think we can make this marriage work." Dr. young explained.

Wait, he wants us to come back? No way, I had to stop this.

"Hey dad," I smiled "Guess what we discovered!"

Everyone was looking at me.

"I'm not gay!" Carlisle placed his hand over his face scared of what was coming next. "Everything's okay. You didn't screw us up."

"Thank you for the information Emmett." Carlisle said grabbing the shoulder of my jacket. "Thank you for fitting us in your schedule Dr. Young." Carlisle said as we walked out the door.

"Dr. Cullen, if you and your wife need to discuss something with me feel free to call and make an appointment." Dr. Young called out as we walked out of his office.


	23. Chapter 23

**After a gracious reader sending me a PM and a quick proofread I noticed a major flaw in this chapter....Didn't catch it *winks* Don't worry about it...**

BPOV

"Just smile Bella." This was about the tenth time I had heard Alice repeat those words in the last fifteen minutes.

"Alice," I grumbled.

"Bella, just look at it this way. Your day is going better than Carlisle's."

"What," I started to ask her what she meant by that but we were interrupted as the door to the locker room opened.

"Hey, are you girls ready?" Coach Meyers asked poking her head in the door.

"Well be right out." Alice replied still smiling.

I looked back into the mirror one last time; taking in how ridiculous I looked in the blue and yellow uniform. Alice checked herself over once more and tugged at my hand.

"Come on, besides this will be nothing compared to the way Edward is going to torture you once he sees you in that." Alice giggled.

"Alice, could you stay out of my sex life?" I asked as she pulled me out of the locker room.

We went out to a small field on the side of the football field and met with the rest of the girls. All of whom I knew of and knew they of how they detested me because of Edward.

"Hi!" A perky blonde I recognized as Courtney from algebra said as she came running up to us.

"Hi!" Alice exclaimed fitting right in with the clique. I rolled my eyes and smiled, it was good to see Alice so happy.

Courtney led us over to Coach Meyer's and the rest of the cheerleaders. I didn't have to have Edwards abilities to know they all hated me.

I shrugged it off and decided to make the best of this even if only for Alice's enjoyment.

EPOV

"Great play!" Coach yelled to Jasper.

_Why the hell hadn't I been told these kids could play. I bet if these two are this good the big one should be amazing._

I laughed at Coach Pattinson's evaluation of our skills; if he only knew that we were only giving about one percent trying to look human.

My gaze shifted back to Bella, standing there in that cute little uniform. I watched as she jumped up and down each time hoping her skirt would fly up a little more as well.

_Wow. The Cullen's must have really gotten some school spirit. First Edward and Jasper are on the team and now Bella and Alice are cheerleaders. Watching them in those skirts will make the games a whole lot better._

I growled under my breath as I looked over and saw Daniel staring at Bella and Alice.

I felt a wave of calm come over me as Jasper approached. I noticed everyone was taking a water break, I grabbed my water bottle and held it up to my mouth. "I don't like it either, lets just try and get this week done." Jazz said reassuringly.

The camera crew approached and asked to get a couple of shots of us throwing the ball.

"Wow, did you just see that flip Bella Cullen did, I'd like to see her like that a little closer up." I heard Daniel whisper to Bill.

I got a little distracted and threw the ball a little harder than intended. Granted it wasn't at full vamp speed it was harder than a normal seventeen year old. I was lucky I was throwing the ball to Jasper, he caught it effortlessly and jogged back over nonchalantly.

_I didn't just see that? No way did this kid throw the ball like that. Our chances for making state this year just skyrocketed._

I felt bad for leading them on. I knew we wouldn't stay on the team after this week. We weren't as miserable as Bella but I wasn't jumping with joy like Alice either.

"Hey Coach," I said as I approached him after practice had let out. "I just wanted you to know that football really isn't my thing. I promised I would do it for the week but after that I don't think I will be playing." _What? The kid is good. I don't think I can change his mind though. Maybe I can change his brother's mind though. _

I grinned as I made my way back over to Jasper, I'm sure Alice would see what was coming to him.

Jasper and I walked over to meet the girls. Alice was right, I wanted to rip Bella's outfit off of her right now.

"She's your sister." Jasper whispered motioning towards the camera.

"Bella, you can ride home with me." Alice said pulling on Bella's hand dragging my angel away from me.

"I think Alice is trying to make sure her uniform doesn't get destroyed before the game on Friday." Jasper explained as we walked towards my Volvo.

After we had been home for a little while it was evident that Alice and Bella did not head directly home. I called Bella's cell to find she had been kidnapped by Alice; in other words they were shopping. I grinned when Bella said goodbye promising she would pick something up to make up for the fact that I didn't get to admire her cheerleader uniform as long as I would have liked to.

I hung up the phone and Theresa approached me.

"How did practice go?" She asked.

"Fine," I shrugged trying to get out of the room before she asked me where Bella and Alice were.

"Where are your sisters?" Theresa asked.

"They are still at practice." I lied.

_He's lying. He doesn't know that I called to check in, make sure they went. I just got off the phone with Coach Meyers. What should I say._

"I meant to say that they are practicing separately with some of the other girls." I explained.

_It's like he's reading my mind, like he knows me, like he truly understands me._

I smiled and turned to walk away.

_He's going to go play his piano, I'll wait till he's alone up there, then I can go talk to him alone._

I decided against going upstairs and made my way to the game room. I was interrupted by Carlisle's thoughts as he approached the house. He was angry, his thoughts were incoherent.

"Dad, I said I'm sorry." Emmett came in the door apologizing.

I glanced over to Carlisle and had to hold back laughter as he explained to me what had happened.

_I don't know what the therapist thinks; but I'm sure he thinks I'm gay. He wants me and Esme to come in and talk to him._

I looked over to Emmett and Rose trying to figure out what had happened.

_I told them Emmett had erectile dysfunction because Jasper was messing with his head and he assumed Emmett had feelings for Jasper._

I couldn't help but laugh at Rosalie's thoughts. Poor Carlisle, we really owed him.

"Emmett, Rose, how did therapy go?" Theresa asked as she entered the room.

Emmett began telling Theresa about therapy. Knowing Emmett he would come out of this appearing to be perfect as well.

_Here we go again._

Carlisle sat down getting stuck in the conversation.

I decided to make a run for it and headed upstairs. I heard Nessie giggling and decided to go check on her


	24. The Cougar

**A/N: Okay, here's the next chapter. Hope you enjoy.**

**BTW: I do not own any of the characters.**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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BPOV

"She's going to check the car. We need to hide these things." Alice explained on the drive home. "We can hide the bags in the woods and come back later to get them."

I couldn't help but laugh. "Alice you really do have a problem."

I glanced out the window thinking about how ironic it was for me to actually want to go shopping. It was after nine, which meant shopping had taken the place of Theresa's family dinner and devotion.

My thoughts shifted to Edward; I thought about how he looked out there playing football today. Defiantly very un Edward like but in a way kind of sexy.

We stopped at the side of the road and dashed into the woods bags in hand. I caught Alice looking back as we made got back into the car.

Poor Alice she looked like she had just abandoned her baby in the woods. "They'll be alright." I assured her.

"I know" She replied. Of course she knew. "It's just hard to part with all those things." she said wiping an imaginary tear from her eye. I couldn't help but roll my eyes at her dramatization.

We got home to be greeted by Carlisle and Theresa.

"Did you kids have fun?" Theresa asked.

"Yeah, we did, we worked on some of the routines for Friday with a few of the girls on the team." Alice sang happily.

"Maybe you could

"Good." Carlisle smiled. "Why don't you two show us something?"\

I could have killed him. Why was he doing this to us? Well not Alice, I think she actually liked practice. What did I ever do to deserve this?

Alice stood in position, hands clasped together in front of her ready to cheer. I looked at her and moaned. She had to have seen this coming.

"Come on Bells," Alice looked at me with her sad puppy face that I couldn't deny.

"Hey, Hey, Hey hey are you ready?" Alice and I shouted.

We did our little jump as we clapped twice."Are you ready?"

We clapped again."To play"We jumped and clapped."Say go team Go team"

Clap clap as we jumped up ending the cheer in a split we shouted."Panthers all the way!"

Theresa and Carlisle clapped, I sighed as I got back up ready to get out of the room to hide from the cameras in the comfort of my own room.

"Bravo" I heard my Edward whisper.

It was times like this I was thankful I couldn't blush. I turned to face him and noticed the look on his face. He looked very solemn, I hadn't seen him look this disheartened in years.

I glanced back to the camera, Alice was using this time to tell the camera about her experience today. With the camera crew distracted I grabbed Edwards hand and pulled him into our bedroom locking the door.

"What are you thinking about?" I asked as I sat down on the bed next to him.

"Our little girl is growing up." He whispered.

I couldn't help but smile. "Of course she is love, that's what children do."

"But so quickly." he sighed.

"Why is this bothering you now?" I asked wondering what had happened today.

"I was just watching her earlier." he sighed. "She's an amazing person."

I leaned over to him and rested my head on his chest. "I know." I whispered as I closed my eyes.

"What are you thinking?"

Ah, the infamous question. I smiled and laid him down on the bed resting myself on top of him I placed my hand on his cheek.

_The two of us lying in our meadow with our hands entwined, him holding me as we danced on our wedding day, swimming in the ocean on our honeymoon, his reaction the first time he heard Renesmee's thoughts, the day I awoke from the change and saw him as perfectly as he truly was, watching him teach Nessie how to play piano, laughing as he tried to teach me, a shopping trip with Alice and Rose, Carlisle tending to me with care during one of my many injuries, Esme bringing me a fresh batch of cookies, beating Emmett in an arm wrestling match, embracing Jasper in a hug after an intense discussion of being a newborn_

I showed him all these images; images of my husband, daughter and the wonderful family I was thankful to have.

I felt his solid body shift under mine and changed the direction of my thoughts.

_The first time we made love waking up covered in feathers, the feel of his lips on mine the first time he truly kissed me after my transformation,_

I felt his hand wrap around me reaching his hands under my skirt I could feel the tension growing under his jeans. He threw his head back and moaned. I forced myself to regain focus. I wanted him to see how much he turned me on, how much I needed him.

_Moaning his name as his lips traveled down my skin, _

There was a knock at the door; we quickly jumped up.

"Hang on." I answered quickly.

"How did you not hear this?" I muttered as I rearranged my skirt.

"You had me distracted." He whispered in my ear. "It's Theresa, she's not happy."

"What's new?" I asked as I opened the door.

"Why was the door locked?" She screamed at me.

"Theresa, dad, I didn't realize the door had locked. I needed Edward to help me with some homework, he already had this class I said walking over to his desk and picking up a calculus book. I guess the door swung shut when I came in." I tried to explain.

I could tell by the look on her face and the distance Edward was keeping from me that she was not buying it. I glanced over to Carlisle to find he looked just as upset. We had promised him no sex; of course that didn't mean that we didn't cheat at school. I felt bad, I couldn't imagine the pain he felt being away from Esme.

"Bella, I think you need to go to your room now." Theresa said sternly pointing down the hall towards my room.

Edward handed me the calculus book I was supposed to be working on and I caught a quick glimpse of my favorite crooked grin.

I heard Carlisle's footsteps following me down the hall along with that of the camera crew.

"Bella," he stopped me as I stopped at my door.

I could hear Alice and Jasper bringing in the bags from our shopping trip earlier that day. I listened to her for a second and realized that she was modeling them for Jasper. This wasn't funny, she was doing this on purpose.

"Bella darling. Is there anything we need to talk about?" Carlisle asked trying to play the concerned father.

Hmmm how should I answer:

'Yes, I am sex deprived and want to have wild passionate sex with my husband'

probably wouldn't go over too well with the camera's.

"No, I just needed to get my homework done." I smiled holding up the book.

I listened in to Alice and Jasper, I knew Carlisle was doing the same. Things were getting hot in there and I couldn't exactly open the door without the camera's attempting to follow me.

"Why don't I help you. It's been a while but I think I remember. Isaac Newton, laws of gravity, distance equals speed times time right?"

I laughed as we went down to his study. This should be interesting. Carlisle could remember a time before all of this was invented. He watched as these equations were discovered.

EPOV

_No one's watching us. Talk to him._

I was picking up her thoughts trying to make sense of them why did she want me alone.

"Edward, is there something going on between you and Bella?" Theresa asked.

I paused and listened to her thoughts before I spoke.

_HE couldn't be he's so much better than her. She's not even that beautiful, not to mention she's not talented, for someone who was working on those cheers all afternoon her beat was a little off, he's so perfect she's just trash. I wonder where the Cullen's found her._

I took a deep unnecessary breath to calm myself.

"Do you have a problem with her?" I asked waiting for her answer.

"No, why do you ask?" She asked her mind turning to a frenzy about where this conversation was going.

"The way you asked there was something about your voice." I lied.

"You still didn't answer my question." she reminded me.

This time I didn't have to lie. "I care for Bella very deeply."

_He's such a gentleman, mature beyond his years. Why can't he see he can do better? _

I didn't speak. I had to fight the urge to tear her head off.

"Edward," Theresa spoke as she walked towards me resting a hand on my shoulder.

_So firm, what a great body._

"Edward, you are young, many girls will come in and out of your life. Just remember you don't have to settle." She said rubbing her hand on my shoulder. I didn't move curious to see what she was thinking.

_He's perfect, oh, the things I could teach him. I may be older but I am much more experienced than Bella. Maybe I should just make a move, maybe he's into cougars. _

I could no longer control myself I stared into her eyes and let out a low growl exposing myself as the monster I was.

She stared at me in disbelief as she stepped back.

"I think you need to exit my room." I snarled.

She didn't say another word as she left. I listened in to her thoughts and was assured she wouldn't tell anyone what just happened. First of all she didn't want to tell anyone what she was doing and second she didn't want to admit she was now scared of a seventeen year old.

I turned on some music and laid back on the bed as I closed my eyes wishing I could forget what just happened.

"I hear you don't like cougar's anymore?" Jasper laughed as he entered the room.

"That's not a cougar, that's a pedophile." I muttered.

"Edward, you're a hundred and seven." Jasper reminded me.

With that I closed my eyes taking in the music my thoughts drifting to Bella and Renesmee my two miracles I never thought I would have deserved.

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**Next Chapter is Theresa's Abstinence Education, Let me know if you have any idea's of whos POV it should be in. I've tried starting a few different POV's and can't decide. **


	25. Theresa teaches abstinence

**A/N: **

**Thanks again for all the positive reviews. For those of you who wanted it in Emmett's POV Emmett is not in this chapter. Him and Rosalie are married therefore do not have to worry about abstinence. (Don't worry they will get what is coming to them). **

**I got a few reviews and a lot of PM's telling me I was wrong about Edwards age. I do not admit to knowing everything about Twilight and it's characters. Far from it actually but I did Google it and according to Stephanie Meyer's in an interview she said his birthday was June 20th 1901. That would make him 107. **

**This is a fanfiction. I do not own any of these characters. Since it was SM's characters I fell in love with while reading about them I try to keep them true to their character but sometimes it is fun to alter their personalities.**

**All of that being said on to the story.**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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TPOV

I sat at the dining room table, everything was all ready. The table had been set I just needed to place the food on the table once everyone arrived. This week has been interesting to say the least. I dreamt of Edward last night; I dreamt that things went differently last night and I ended up in his bed with him. I know it's wrong but something about him mesmerizes me. I can't think strait when I am around him, he's not your average teenager.

Tonight's discussion should be interesting. I know there is something going on between Bella and Edward but what about Alice and Jasper. Surely it couldn't have just so happened that everyone paired up so nicely. What was Carlisle some sort of orphan matchmaker?

Emmett and Rose were going to need much more counseling. I really liked the two of them they seemed to sincerely love each other and both of them were such sweet nice kids.

Renesmee was sadly doing a good job as a parent. This may not be going where I thought it may be going; at least Jacob hadn't come back.

I was startled by a knock at the door. I walked over to open it to my surprise I found I may have spoken too soon about Jacob.

"Hi, I know you said I couldn't be here, but dad told me to come over for dinner tonight. Something about abstinence and safe sex or something." Jake said looking down at his feet completely embarrassed.

Why did he need to be here? Was he involved with someone? He had spent a lot of time with Bella as well the first week, and Edward supposedly had an on and off again girlfriend. Maybe Jacob and Bella had something going on.

I hesitantly let him in and was surprised when he followed me into the kitchen.

"Sorry, I've been running around a lot lately, I'm starving." He said as he reached into the fridge and pulled out some cold cuts.

"So your not a vegetarian?" I asked.

"No, far from it." he laughed.

I went over to the stove and stirred the green beans I had cooked with extra bacon. I grabbed a bowl and was preparing to put them in the serving dish when I dropped the pan. Green beans went flying across the floor.

"Scruffy!" I yelled calling the dog. I saw Jacob turn his head to me holding back a laugh.

"The dog drives me crazy but he makes an effective vacuum." I said as I noticed Nessie walk into the kitchen laughing.

"Hey Jake." She smiled and walked by barely looking at him.

For someone who put up such a fight about not seeing him she barely looked like she had missed him.

Carlisle came home from work, once he got home Emmett and Rose came down to spend some time with him. I stood watching Jacob and Renesmee playing a game, it seemed innocent enough but I was still not letting them out of my sight. The rest of the kids arrived and we quickly sat down to eat.

Dinner seemed to go okay, Carlisle and Jasper still refused to eat the meat. I was going to say something but decided against it. I had enough built up to discuss tonight.

After dinner I was glad to see Rosalie and Alice help me clean up. Bella rushed off to talk to Jacob. I peeked in on them to see the two of them whispering so quietly no one else could hear. Maybe she was playing them both. I didn't see Edward around maybe he was oblivious to their relationship.

I called the entire family back to the table Carlisle and I took one end of the table leaving the rest of them circled around facing us. I grabbed a small bag and pulled out five small boxes. I didn't expect Jacob to be here.

EPOV

I opened the box to find a small band., it looked similar to a small wedding band.

"These are promise rings." Theresa explained. "I want you to wear them to remind you why you are waiting till marriage to have sex. Sorry Jacob I thought this was family only.

"And why is that?" Bella asked.

"Why is what?" Theresa asked confused.

"Why is it that we should wait till marriage." That's my Bella, always pushing the boundaries. "I mean if we love someone why should we wait."

_Dirty little slut_ Theresa's thoughts upset me intensely; I grasped the side of my chair holding back my anger hoping not to break the chair.

"Because that's what God tells us to do." She replied. "God says 'But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion. First Corinthians 7:9"

"What if we don't believe in God." I asked, knowing this would irritate her more than anything.

_Okay, don't push the Lord, explain this for other reasons. They aren't going to listen to you, save their souls any way possible._

Success, she wouldn't be bringing religion into this anymore. Sort of pointless when your eternally damned.

Theresa recomposed herself "Well there are many other reasons to wait until you are married. Contracting sexually transmitted diseases is another reason to abstain. If you and your partner are committed through marriage to each other and you remain true to each other you won't contract any of these diseases."

_Their father is a doctor, don't you think he would go over this stuff with them a little better. _Theresa was getting frustrated by the blank stares we were giving her.

_A hundred and sixty six years and I haven't contracted anything yet. _I glanced over at Jasper rolling his eyes.

"This is serious." Theresa reminded us. Realizing that she was getting no where she changed the subject.

"Why don't you guys take turns telling me about some of your past or present relationships, how you handle the pressures of dating." Theresa suggested.

_Please keep this normal, please keep this normal, _Carlisle was chanting in his head.

"Alice, why don't you go first." Theresa suggested.

"Well," Alice started. "I have only been in one committed relationship, that I know of."

"And are you still with that person?" Theresa asked.

Carlisle sighed in relief that Theresa hadn't caught on to the second part of the statement.

Alice glanced around the room her gaze stopping on Jasper. Jasper's tensed from Alice's feelings of lust towards him at that moment. His head spinning with fantasies of the two of them. It didn't take long for the feeling to spread through the room. My mind quickly shifted to Bella and all the things I longed to do to her. I shook the thoughts out of my head and turned back to Alice.

"Yes." She squealed in delight.

Carlisle placed his hand over his eyes rubbing the bridge of his nose. _Oh God no, now people know I have two kids shacking up. DCF is going to come investigate thinking we're running some sort of brothel. Esme said this would happen. Told me they couldn't go without sex. _

"Do you go to school with him." Theresa asked.

"Yes." Alice replied feeding into her curiosity.

"Is there a reason you don't ever invite him over?" Theresa asked.

_Is he some kind of druggie or some psycho your parents don't approve of? _Was what she wanted to ask.

"Oh, I don't need to invite him over." Alice giggled making her even more confused.

_Damn she's so sexy playing coy. Just say it already Alice before I take you right here on the dining room table._

I coughed hoping Jasper would remember that I can hear his every thought. If he didn't stop Bella and I would be joining them.

"Why don't you invite him over?" Theresa asked again.

"Well," Alice giggled and took Jasper's hand. "Because he lives here."

"Alice, you and Jasper!" I was surprised to hear Bella exclaim.

_Huh, I thought he was gay. _I debated playing along with Theresa's thoughts but one glance at Carlisle reminded me it was a bad idea.

"So, you and Jasper?" Theresa asked. "Carlisle did you know about this?"

_Shit, what would a normal parent say? _"I had no idea." Carlisle said trying to sound shocked.

_Of course he wouldn't know, this is ridiculous these kids, being together, like together. This probably means I'm right about Edward and Bella. _

I smiled as I turned my attention back to Alice and Jasper.

"It hasn't been long." Jasper assured us.

"So you two haven't had intercourse?" Theresa asked.

"NO." Alice replied quickly. _We just fuck, have sex, make love, copulate, fornicate, procreate _

"I think you made them uncomfortable. Maybe we could discuss this situation later, alone." Carlisle suggested trying to change the subject.

"Jacob, what about you?" Theresa asked turning attention to Jake.

"Well, I was in love once." Jake replied.

"And" Theresa asked probing for more information.

"She died." Nessie laughed. She had been sitting there so quietly that it came as even more of a shock. We all began laughing.

"Renesmee, I don't think it's appropriate to laugh over something so serious." Theresa said shocked we were all laughing.

"It's okay." Jake said "I'm over it."

"So you have never been intimate with anyone?" Theresa asked.

"Nope, only had one kiss that meant anything." Jake explained. I thought back to that day, I knew Jake no longer had feelings towards Bella but the way he said it angered me.

"You see how well that worked out." I said cockily reminding him to watch his memories of my wife if he had any intentions with my daughter.

"Edward, What do you mean?" Theresa asked again looking confused.

"Just drop it." Bella glanced over to me giving me the eye, letting me know not to tread back down that road.

"Drop what?" Theresa asked. _I feel like I am missing out on something._

"Jake tried to kiss Bella but Bella hit him and broke her hand." I quickly explained.

"Didn't you sleep with her too Jake?" Alice asked giggling.

"That was for warmth." Bella argued.

_Carlisle doesn't look shocked by any of this. Does he encourage this behavior? _

"It's true, we were out camping and the weather was colder than we expected, Edward was with us too."

_A menage a trois with Edward, who could resist._

I sat uncomfortable in this whole situation. I didn't want to hear Jake's thoughts, I didn't know what would upset me more. Thoughts of Bella or Nessie.

"Let's just say I have found my soul mate, it's just not the right time for us." Jake said hoping to drop the subject.

He was wrong. "Why isn't it the right time?" Theresa asked.

"Yeah Jake, why isn't it the right time?" Nessie asked.

_He's never going to see me differently, I'm almost four. Okay that sounds bizarre even to me but I am over halfway done growing. He's no longer a big brother to me, I love him. _

My fists clenched the arm rests on the chair snapping them in half. I quickly pushed myself back pretending it was the chair that had gave way.

The entire family sat there looking at me. Bella stood and extended her hand to me. I was so shocked by what I heard I could barely move. I took hold of her hand.

_Do you want me to put my shield up for the rest of this._

I shook my head. Maybe it was better to hear these things.

"Excuse me," I said getting up. "I am going to go to the bathroom."

"As I was saying." I heard Jake as I walked up the stairs. "She is in school now, I don't want to interfere. We both have some growing up and I promised her and her parents I wouldn't interfere."

I stood at the top of the stairs and sighed thinking how much Renesmee was like her mother.

"Your up next bro." Emmett chuckled. "What kind of wild stories are we going to hear about you and Bella?"

Emmett and Rose had been listening in the whole time.

"I think Theresa would really appreciate that you refused to do the deed until you were married." Rosalie grinned. "But then you would have to explain to her that you made the 40 year old virgin look like a stud."

"Not to mention you knocked her up and killed her." Emmett laughed.

I sighed and walked back downstairs not giving them the satisfation of frustrating me; hoping to get this night over with quickly.

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**Damn, another cliffhanger. Don't worry, it will be updated soon. Second part in progress just felt it was too long for one chapter. **


	26. The abstinence talk part 2

**A/N: As promised the second part to the abstinence talk. **

**And I guess I have to say this as much as it hurts me I don't own these characters. They are all Stephanie Meyers creation. I just like playing with them.  
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EPOV

"Edward, can we have a minute?" Theresa asked as I walked towards the dining room.

"Not now, I just really want to get this over with." I replied walking past her.

"Edward please," Theresa said grabbing my hand.

_Wow, his hands are so cold, so firm and cold, maybe he needs me to warm him up_

"Edward, I had this dream about you last night; you and I." She continued to explain. "I've felt like there is this connection between us." She placed her hand on my chest cornering me.

I could have easily gotten past her, but then there would probably be more explaining. To my relief Alice and Jasper silently came up behind her.

_Wow, can you feel the lust, Edward you have an admirer. Sorry, Alice saw this happening after you left, we just thought it would be funny to sit back and watch you squirm. _Thanks Jazz, I thought however thankful they had thwarted Theresa's plans.

"Is everything okay?" Alice chirped causing Theresa to jump.

"Oh, umm…Edward here was just explaining he was nervous about talking to everyone about his relationships. He told me to feel how quickly his heart was beating." Theresa explained.

I could hear everyone in the dining room as well as Emmett and Rose upstairs laughing. Jasper was trying not to burst into laughter as he frantically tried to calm everyone else down. Alice just looked over at Theresa and smiled.

"That's good." She smiled. "I was thinking you were some kind of sick demented individual like your husband."

Theresa's jaw dropped open.

_How does she know what Tim's like? Did she know what my true intentions were?_

The three of us walked out of the room hoping this put her in her place.

Theresa composed herself and reentered the room.

"Well, since Edward was just showing me how nervous he was" Theresa said as we all tried to control our laughter. "Why don't we discuss your life Bella."

I watched Bella pause trying not to burst into laughter. "Okay, what do you want to know she asked."

"Well Edward explained your attempted suicide to me, was that related to a guy?" She asked Bella.

"No." Bella replied not divulging any other information.

"I know this is off the subject but what happened that day?" Theresa asked as I sat back curious to hear what sort of story Bella would concoct.

"I jumped off a cliff, Jake saved me." she said flatly.

"Oh Bella, don't forget how we saved Edward." Alice added.

"You saved Edward?" Theresa asked her confusion again increasing.

"Yeah, my dumb ass brother decided he couldn't live if Bella was dead." Jasper said laughing.

"If it weren't for you I would never have left Bella." I retorted quickly realizing this situation was getting out of hand.

"Edward." Both Alice and Bella yelled at me.

"Sorry that was uncalled for." I apologized to Jasper. I really didn't blame him for the events of Bella's birthday.

_He couldn't live without her? But I thought her and Jake? What's this about her and Jasper? I mean she's pretty but to attract all of these guys? Total Slut! Who would want her she obviously has some sort of mental defect. Who would die for someone?_

If only she knew Bella did die for me.

"Edward, is this true?" Theresa asked.

"Yes, but I obviously didn't go through with it and it brought me back to Bella." I said grabbing Bella's hand. If everyone else was hooking up why couldn't we.

"So Bella, what happened between you and Jasper?" Theresa asked.

"Well, umm…" Bella started trying to describe what had happened.

"Bella was still kind of new to the family and I knew her and Edward were starting to have feelings but I made a move on her." Jasper explained.

_Hmmm is that what were calling it now? I'll have to apologize to Esme for making a move on that Elk the other day._

I looked over at Carlisle as we both tried not to burst into laughter.

"But I rejected him." Bella explained.

"Okay, so Bella you and Edward are together now?" Theresa asked.

"Yes." We both responded in unison.

"So I take it since Jasper was hitting on you, you two have been together longer than them?"

"Yes."

"So are you two sexually active?" Theresa asked and I decided to be quiet and see where Bella took this.

"No." Bella said sadly. Theresa let out a sigh of relief until Bella finished her sentence. "No, Edward won't sleep with me."

The past was coming back to haunt me, all those time's I had told Bella no, all those boundaries I made. I felt like it was four years ago all over again.

"Bella, it's not that I don't want to sleep with you." I said remembering all the conversations of our past. "I just don't want to hurt you."

"Oh Edward, you won't hurt me, you would never hurt me." Bella said in the most dramatically exaggerated voice.

"I don't know you could get pregnant." Nessie giggled.

"Renesmee Carlie Cullen." I exclaimed probably sounding a little too fatherly.

"Renesmee is right." Theresa agreed. "Bella, you are far too young to worry about having children."

She paused for a moment. I caught her thought and knew it was going to drive Bella crazy.

"Nessie, where is your baby." Theresa asked.

"Well I would think you would know considering you have been watching me like a hawk but I am having Rose baby-sit." Nessie replied sarcastically.

"Go get her." Theresa demanded.

Nessie went upstairs to get the baby. Bella glanced over to me as if to ask what was happening. I was scared to tell her so I just shrugged my shoulders and squeezed her hand.

_Edward Anthony Mason Cullen you tell me right now what the hell this bitch is up to._

Wow, I was so mesmerized by her lifting her shield I didn't even care what she was saying to me, besides she's cute when she's angry.

"Her mind is too hard to read right now, she's being indecisive." I whispered low enough only Bella would hear. I hated lying to her but I honestly wanted to see her reaction.

_Daddy, can you please talk to Uncle Emmett, I never want to see that again._

Nessie looked at me cradling her baby she had come to love. I didn't have to ask to know she had found Emmett and Rose in a compromising situation. I let out a low growl of frustration and looked apologetically at my daughter.

_It wasn't that bad they weren't naked or anything, just…ick. _

I smiled at the realization that my little girl was not fully grown. Bella glanced over at me wondering what had happened.

"Emmett." I whispered silently under my breath. She didn't have time to respond.

"Bella, I think that your desire to have a child is sick." Theresa said.

"I don't want a child!" Bella yelled.

"What?" Nessie sounded shocked. Bella looked over to Nessie. We all knew Nessie was just playing along but I could tell Bella was upset she had just said that.

"You don't want Kadidu?" Nessie asked quietly looking at Bella.

Alice and Jasper were practically on the floor laughing Carlisle once again had his head in his hands.

"No, I LOVE Kadidu." Bella said reassuringly.

"Good," Theresa smiled. "You can take care of Kadidu for the rest of the week."

"Your going to be a great mother." Nessie smiled as she passed Kadidu over to Bella. I had to agree.

"What's Kadidu mean?" Bella asked looking down at the baby.

"Dog" Jake said bursting into laughter.

"What, you named your child dog?" Bella exclaimed.

"I just thought it sounded pretty." Nessie said defensively. We all knew differently but it would be hard to explain to Theresa that Jake was really a dog; Okay technically wolf same difference right? and our daughter was in love with him.

"Well Edward, I guess your new daughter's name is dog." Bella giggled.

"Hey congratulations you're a father now!" Jake laughed.

"Can we be done here?" I asked looking at Carlisle.

"Yes." He said quickly not waiting for Theresa's response.

"Wait," Bella stopped us from leaving. "Since Edward and I have a baby together can we share a bedroom."

"Out!" I was shocked by Carlisle's reaction. Maybe we had put him through too much.


	27. Alice's vision

**A/N: Sorry it took a while to update, been having issues with my computer.  
**

**All characters belong to Stephanie Meyer**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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EsPOV

Four more days and I would see my Carlisle. We had never been apart this long. I hate that it makes me sound weak but I feel so alone. Not to mention I have no purpose for being here.  
Since my little meeting with Tim the other night he refused to let me near his family. The crew tried to explain to him that there was no way that I could have gotten to his house, that it was just a hallucination.  
It's fine by me. Sure I miss the kids and want only the best for them but I have a feeling once this is all over things will all work out for the best.  
For now I am spending the rest of my time here in my hotel room. We got a few random shots of me sitting around the hotel room, venting about the events of the past week and a half. I was concerned it wouldn't be enough to do a full show on; I was wrong.  
A few phone calls to the crew at home indicated that they would have more than enough footage from my family. Great, something else to worry about.  
I'm sure at least one of my children has been caught in the act, normally I would assume Emmett and Rose but I couldn't put it past Edward and Bella. At least Jasper hasn't attacked any of the humans, I'm pretty sure I would have heard about that. The Barrett's live such simplistic lifestyles, poor Alice must be going crazy. I hope Carlisle is handling everything okay.

BPOV

"I still don't see why I have to wear this all day." I mumbled to Alice as we headed out to our cars.  
"Bella, it's a game day, we are supposed to wear our uniforms." Alice chirped as her and Jasper got into her car.  
"You don't see me complaining." Edward smiled pointing out the fact he was wearing his football jersey.  
"Yeah, but your ass isn't hanging out of your uniform." I disputed.  
"C'mon Bells I just got a mental image of Edward in that damn skirt." Emmett yelled as we made our way to the Volvo.  
"Let's just get today over with." Edward suggested.  
"Isabella Cullen! Get over here." I heard Theresa scream.  
"Can't I got to get to school." I replied trying to make an escape.  
"Aren't you forgetting something?" I cringed realizing she was actually going to make me go through with this.  
"Bella, I'm ashamed you were going to leave your own child home alone?" Emmett reprimanded me.  
I had gotten into quite a bit of trouble with Theresa yesterday for using Nessie as a babysitter. I had used her excuse of not having a car seat. To my surprise and Alice's dismay Theresa went out and purchased a old car seat from a local thrift store. It was almost worth it to listen to Alice go on a rant about the car seat being blue.  
I easily solved this problem. I changed the baby's sex.  
I ran back into the house and grabbed the diaper bag, also bought at the thrift store and also blue, and headed back to the car with my little EJ.  
"How the hell are we supposed to fit in here?" Rose asked looking at the small back seat now even more cramped by the car seat.  
"Well, you can always ride with Theresa." I smiled knowing Rose would rather ride the bus again than go through another car ride to school with Theresa.  
I strapped EJ into the car seat and laughed as Emmett tried to squeeze himself into the back seat.  
We got to school, Rose and Emmett rushed out of the car leaving me Edward and EJ.  
"At least the camera's are following us for a little while, that should take away some of the questions." Edward assured me.  
I just sighed and got out of the car, Edward quickly assisted me.  
"What are they thinking?" I asked Edward as we made our way into the building.  
"Bella love, your wearing a cheerleading uniform and carrying a baby doll. Do you really want to know.  
"Edward." I sighed not knowing if I actually wanted to know what he was hearing.

EPOV

I walked down the hallway leading towards the gym. I saw my Bella standing there little EJ on her hip. It was my turn to take him while she was in gym class.  
I also caught many of the comments bouncing through the heads of my fellow classmates.  
_Maybe she really is pregnant, this just practice_. A short redhead I didn't recognize  
_What is this some kind of statement cheerleaders and sex? First she joins the squad and now she is making us cheerleaders look slutty. _Tiffany a ditzy blond also donning a blue and gold uniform stared at her.  
_Hey, I'd deal with having a kid if it meant getting into that skirt._ I growled silently under my chest pushing Daniels thoughts out of my head.  
_Wow, I always figured Edward was gay._ I recognized the sound of the thoughts behind me, I turned back as Emmett stood standing there laughing.  
I glanced back over to Bella, she looked ticked. I quickly made my way to her side.  
"Here you go." She said putting baby EJ in my arms, the sudden movement causing him to cry.  
"Come on Bella," April smiled as she held the door open for Bella.  
"The bottle is in the diaper bag." she said turning and going into the gym.  
"Damn new mom." Bella explained as they walked into gym.  
I quickly grabbed the bottle and struggled with how to feed him while carrying my books.  
"Here," Alice smiled holding out her hands to help me.  
She shoved my books into her bag and we walked to our next class.  
"At least Nessie is actually having a good day." Alice said as we sat down.  
"What do you mean?" I asked only to be interrupted by Mr. Tucker beginning class.  
Nothing Edward, it's all okay. Alice reassured me but quickly changed her thoughts from Nessie._ I can't wait to get those Steve Madden boots I saw online last night, Shopping Sunday, Jasper promised shopping, he needs new clothes though, we all do. He actually wore the same pair of pants twice in the past two weeks._  
Alice glanced over at me, I put my head down and began reading my text book. She would never think about it if I was watching her. Suddenly I realized she was having another vision. This she couldn't block from me. I kept my head down as I peeked into her vision.  
_'Nessie,' Jake paused looking at her, they were both sitting out in the woods. She put her hand on his cheek showing him something. He smiled and lifted his hand placing in on her cheek. He lowered his head leaning down to kiss her as she closed her eyes._  
Snap!  
Alice's vision faded. I looked down and realized I snapped the pen I had been holding. Ink splattered everywhere. I looked over at Alice how could she have not told me about this?  
I shoved the baby onto her desk and quickly excused myself claiming the need to clean myself of the ink. I slipped out of the room and called Carlisle asking him to call and dismiss Bella and I from class.  
I then ran to the gym, and explained to Coach Pattinson that Bella and I had a dentist appointment. She looked at me quizzically, smiled and rushed over to me.  
"Hmmm… A dentist appointment?" She giggled "Oh Edward, can we get some fangs like the vampires in the movies?"  
I didn't respond, I couldn't speak, I just knew I needed to get home, stop whatever that mutt may be doing to my little girl. Bella finally realized something was wrong.  
"Edward?" Bella stared at me as I drove home.  
"Nessie, Jake, damn mutt." I couldn't form a complete sentence.  
"Edward." Bella said putting her hand on mine. "What's wrong, are they okay?"  
I sat pondering her question as I drove home. She needed to know but I couldn't say it aloud couldn't admit it was finally happening.  
"Edward." Bella said a little more harshly this time.  
We pulled up to the house.  
"Edward, please." Bella said chasing me into the house.  
"Edward," Theresa stopped me at the door.  
"Where is Nessie?" I asked sharply.  
"Why aren't you in school?" she asked.  
Bella squeezed my hand _Edward, Camera's calm down, please._  
"I'm sorry." I apologized quickly composing myself. "My father called the school, he forgot we had a dentist appointment we are already late and we need to be out in time to make it to the football game." I added the last part to appease Theresa.  
"Bella, where is your baby?" she asked ignoring what I had said.  
"I can't take her to the dentist." Bella said sarcastically. "She's with Rose since they don't have to go to the dentist."  
"Oh, okay" she said uncertain of what to think. "She is out back, Jake came over."  
"What." I exclaimed, I knew what was coming but I had hoped I wasn't too late.

JbPOV

"Jake," Nessie sighed as she shoved her hands into my chest.  
I couldn't help but laugh at her causing her to once again hit me.  
"It's not funny." she groaned.  
"Nessie," I stopped, there was something moving through the tree's. Within seconds Edward was leaping towards me. We tumbled to the ground, he landed on top of me his hand wrapping around my throat as he bared his teeth and snarled at me.  
"Really Edward, that might have some dramatic look if we did go to the dentist and get those fangs, but please just get off Jake." Bella said looking down on us. I had a feeling I was missing out on something.  
He leapt up off of me and Nessie came running to my side.  
"Daddy, what are you doing?" Nessie demanded.  
"I think your father is having a hard time letting his little girl go." Bella explained.  
I swear Edward, I didn't touch her. I informed Edward scared to say the words out loud for fear of upsetting Nessie.  
"Alice saw it." Edward screamed back at me.  
"Daddy," Nessie walked up to him. "Daddy, look." Nessie said placing her hand to his cheek.  
"What exactly happened?" Bella whispered as she pulled me aside.  
"Nothing, Nessie and I were talking and she showed me an image of me licking her, doggy kisses as she described them." I explained.  
"She wanted you to kiss her." Bella stated.  
"Yes, and I did. I kissed her on the top of her head."  
"Oh no." Bella sighed, she obviously knew how Nessie would react to that. "She wasn't happy was she."  
"She hit me." I laughed thinking of how cute she was when she was angry. "At least SHE didn't break her hand doing it."  
Bella playfully punched me in the chest as we glanced back over to Nessie and Edward. Judging by the smile on his face he was probably being shown me being hit. I smiled as I watched them, the image ended and he embraced her in a hug.  
Edward, I swear she caught me completely off guard, I love her but I am sticking to my promise.  
Edward understandingly nodded his head. I would stick to my word. I promised them at least five years. At the time I wasn't sure that even after five years she would develop any feelings for me. I thought of what the next year would be like She's going to make this next year hell.  
Edward chuckled at this. "Now you know how I felt with Bella."  
"Felt about what?" Nessie asked.  
"Let's just say your mother liked to push my boundaries just as your pushing Jakes." Edward explained.  
"I think we need to get out of here before Theresa gets suspicious." Bella suggested.  
"Jake, you coming?" Edward asked. "Wouldn't want to miss Bella cheering at the game." he chuckled as Bella tackled him.


	28. The big game

**A/N: Sorry updates taking longer, still having computer problems, hopefully resolved soon. **

**Thank's again for all the positive reviews. **

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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APOV

"Alice darling, why do you have that baby?" Jazz asked me as I met him between classes.

"Jacob kissed Nessie." I said excitedly.

"So because Jacob kissed Nessie you have a child?" Jasper asked trying to find my reasoning.

"No silly, Edward happened to see the vision of Jake kissing Nessie."

"Ah," He put the pieces together. "So, is the mutt still alive?"

"He only kissed her on the forehead, but Edward interrupted the vision I'm surprised he was calm enough to make it out of the school." I explained.

Jasper just smiled and wrapped my hand in his as he walked towards the cafeteria.

"Jazz, we can't go to lunch." I giggled.

"Why not?" He looked confused.

"Because I need to go to Wal-Mart."

"And what do you need at Wal-Mart?" He asked as we headed out to my car.

"Fangs!" I giggled as he looked even more confused.

"Darling, are you supposed to be shipping this week?" Jasper asked.

I pouted my lips giving him the best sad puppy look, I had to try not to smile as he laughed at me.

We arrived back at school just in time to get ready for the game. I spotted Nessie and Jake and dropped the baby off with them along with a new diaper bag stocked with new clothes I picked up while we were at Wal-Mart.

"Alice, where have you been?" Bella scolded me as Jasper and I made our way towards the field.

"Shopping." Jasper mumbled. He acted like he didn't have fun, I playfully nudged him and he smiled.

"Just don't let your new mommy know, she's sitting right up there." Edward said pointing to the bleachers.

I looked up to see Theresa, Carlisle, Emmett and Rose sitting in the stands.

Coach Meyers called for Bella and I.

"Go get 'em." I quickly kissed Jasper before grabbing Bella and running off to the other side of the field.

The game began and to most of the audience's surprise Coach Pattinson put Jasper and Edward as starters. By the end of the first quarter they were annihilating the competition. All throughout we continued cheering. The beginning of the second quarter Jasper must have realized things were going a little too perfectly, Edward snapped the ball back it traveled to Jasper, he could have easily caught it, instead he stumbled allowing the ball to be intercepted. I watched as he and Edward exchanged glances; Jasper explaining to him to try and be a little more human.

We maintained our lead for the rest of the quarter. By half time the score was 35-3.

"Come on Bella." I smiled as we made our way to the center of the field for halftime.

Katie our team captain lead us, starting the cheer.

"Come on, Panthers, what's your battle cry?"

"V-I-C-T-O-R-Y! Victory! Victory! Panthers!"

We responded back loudly."Come on, crowd, what's your battle cry?"

We shouted trying to pump up the crowd."V-I-C-T-O-R-Y!"

The crowd shouted energetically. With a score like we had it didn't take much to pump them up.

Bella and I and nine other's on the team came together to form a pyramid in the center of the field. I was so excited being the smallest I got to be on top. I called out the rest of the cheer as I took in my surroundings. Victory! (clap, clap) Panthers! (Clap Clap)Victory! (Clap, clap) Panthers! (Clap Clap)

As bad as parts of these past few weeks had been I was thankful to have this experience.

I decided to change things up a little I lifted myself up slightly and prepared to make my move. I quickly sprang up and leaped into the air doing a flip and landing gracefully in front of the pyramid. Okay, maybe it was a little over the top but for all the times I have been to high school I have never felt this good.

If people were shocked by my flawless landing they were even more shocked by what happened next.

The entire crowd gasped then quickly began laughing and cheering. I couldn't hold back the laughter inside myself either as I watched Emmett run across the field. He had painted his entire body blue and yellow and was streaking across the field yelling "Go Panthers!".

"Looks like Emmett got some school spirit as well." Bella laughed as we watched the refs and principal run onto the field to stop him. "Rose isn't going to like this."

"On the contrary," I started to explain.

"Don't tell me she's turned on by that?" Bella asked shocked.

"Sweetie, this is Rose and Emmett were talking about." I reminded her.

Halftime ran a few minutes late thanks to Emmett's little spectacle. The rest of the game however passed very quickly. The final score could possibly set a school record; 71-21.

Theresa came and met us after the game.

"You guys did amazing." She said for the first time this week she didn't add any smart comments, but of course we were complying with what she wanted us to do.

"Hey Theresa can we go out with some of the rest of the team for an hour or so, you know, to celebrate?" I asked smiling hoping she would agree to let us go out and socialize a little more.

She looked over at Carlisle "Emmett and Rose are coming home now, the rest of you have a good time." He said smiling to Emmett.

"Come on, that's not fair." Emmett complained.

"Your right, Rosalie, you did nothing wrong your more than welcome to go to." Carlisle told Rose.

"Bye Em," Rose blew him a kiss as she turned to walk away with us.

"Come on Baby." Emmett pleaded with her. "You really want to hang out with humans?" he added the last part low enough the humans wouldn't hear.

"Were not really going out with the humans, are we?" Rose whispered.

I shook my head and laughed.

"Don't be out too late though, we need to get up early to go hunting in the morning." Theresa reminded us.

Hunting, yeah that would be interesting. I thought as Jasper and I walked to my car.

"Wanna race?" I winked at Edward. I gave him a second to read my mind, it wouldn't be fair if I didn't tell him where we were going.

"That wasn't fair." Jake said as he got out of the car and opened the door for Nessie.

We had been halfway here by the time he and Nessie probably got out of the parking lot.

I didn't really know what to do when I suggested to Theresa that we go out, I just saw it as an escape. I decided on this area of woods because "Maybe it's a problem with the car? You need a new mechanic?" Rose taunted him.

"You want to race me right now?" Jake asked, "Oh wait, you don't even have a car right now."Rose turned her back to walk back towards Bella. "Damn mutt." I heard her mutter.

"You wouldn't be planning of speeding with my daughter in the car?" Edward said sternly.

"No sir," Jake said a little too respectably. "Just like you wouldn't leave your son alone in a car." He said pointing to the baby doll sitting in the back seat of the car.

As if on queue the doll started to cry. Bella sighed and walked over to the car and retrieved the baby.

"The indicator thingy says it needs it's diaper changed." She said reaching around for the diaper bag. "Right here." Jake said as he began rummaging through the bag.

"Stupid thing," Bella mumbled.

I laughed as I remembered how long it had taken Jasper and I to figure out how to make it stop crying when it needed it's diaper changed. You actually had to take the clothes off and pretend to change the diaper. Bella triggered the button on the baby's bottom and made it stop crying.

I looked over to Jake realizing he had found my latest purchase.

"Wait, Jake, I got those for Bella?" I stopped him.

"Alice what did you get me now?" Bella groaned.

"Well you wanted fangs right?" I asked. Nessie and Jake looked utterly confused.

"The excuse we used with Theresa today." Edward laughed as he explained to them how we got out of school.

Jake couldn't stop laughing as he threw us each a pair of fangs, and an extra one to Rose for Emmett. He handed a pair to Nessie.

"Let's see how they look." he smiled as she put them in her mouth.

I could barely understand Nessie as she spoke. "Where's your's?" she asked Jake.

"I'm not a leech."

"No, you're a fangbanger." I told him. I quickly realized I should have gotten Jake a pair of fangs.

"A what?" He asked as I giggled.

"Someone who hangs around Vampires." I explained.

"Yeah, but generally they let the vampires feed off of them." Bella continued to explain. "All the typical vampire lore.""Or drink the blood of the vampires." Nessie added.

"Renesmee," Bella stopped the conversation. "When have you watched True Blood?"

"Ummm with Uncle Emmett." She replied not sure of her answer.

Go Nessie, blame the one that's not here, I thought. Besides it did sound like Emmett to let her watch it.

Bella eyed her suspiciously.

"Nessie, don't blame your uncle for things just because he's not here, he gets into enough trouble on his own." Edward lectured her. "Well talk about this later."

"Besides," Edward laughed turning to Jake. "You are a fangbanger."

"So's your wife." Jake added pointing to Bella.

"Not anymore." Bella giggled as she flashed her plastic fangs at Jacob.

Rose's phone rang, I listened as she answered it. She had a quick conversation with Emmett "We'll be right there." She said hanging up the phone.


	29. Hunting

**A/N: Okay next chapter up (YAY) This was supposed to be one chapter but it sort of turned into two due to length. Next Chapter up soon.**

**Thanks again for all the reviews and support. Oh and BTW I still don't own any of these characters.  
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**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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APOV

"Rose, what's wrong?" I asked as she hung up the phone with Emmett.

"Why are you asking me?" Rose laughed "Aren't you the psychic?""Seriously," Edward interrupted our laughter, "What's going on?"

"He didn't say; just said to get home fast." Rose made our way to our cars and headed home. I racked my brain trying to pick up a vision of what was going on back at the house. I saw Theresa and Carlisle having a conversation in the living room, why couldn't I pick up on what Emmett was doing?"He's up to something." I said looking over to Jasper. I pushed all my focus to Emmett's mind, trying to see what he was planning. "He must be changing his mind quickly, I can't pick anything up."

"This is Emmett, are you seriously telling me he is tricking you?" Jasper laughed.

I pushed my foot harder on the gas as I growled in frustration.

We arrived home, Jasper and I quickly ran into the house.

"Is everything okay?" Carlisle asked

Before I could answer Bella, Rose and Edward came flying in the door.

"What's going on?" Carlisle asked again, this time with more worry in his tone of voice.

"We…" I was suddenly interrupted.

I glanced over to see Emmett wearing our school mascot's uniform. Dressed as big panther he lunged down the stairs and pounced on Edward.

"Don't eat me." Emmett shrieked.

Nessie and Jake walked through the door completely confused as Emmett and Edward wrestled on the floor.

"I think this is Emmett's way of protesting our hunting trip in the morning." Carlisle said still laughing.

TPOV

What is wrong with this family. "Hey!" I shouted surprised that everyone actually turned and gave me their attention. "Hunting is something to take seriously. You can't be out running around there tomorrow or nothing will come close enough to get a shot."

"That's right, so were hunting with guns tomorrow?" Emmett asked.

I swear the boy was retarded, what else would you hunt with? I'm sure I was looking at him like he was stupid.

"I think Emmett means as opposed to bows." Carlisle stated clearing some things up.

"Yeah, yeah" Emmett said holding back laughter, the rest of them were in hysterics, it seemed as if I was missing some kind of inside joke.

"Well, if there are going to be guns out there I think Nessie should stay home. Don't want her getting hurt." Edward said looking at Carlisle.

"Daddy," Nessie argued. I turned to look back at Nessie and saw her looking at Edward. "I don't think that's fair." "He's right Ness." Jake said. "I can come over tomorrow, I'll find something fun for us to do tomorrow."

"NO!" Edward snapped at her quickly turning to Carlisle.

Nessie looked guilty of something, and I swore I saw her mouth 'sorry' to him.

"I think they are right sweetie." Carlisle said returning Edwards glare. It seemed as if they were having some sort of private conversation. The whole conversation seemed completely strange to me.

"Renesmee, why don't you go on up to your room we can figure this out later." Bella said reassuringly.

I watched Nessie trudge upstairs the rest of the kids started to follow and were stopped by Carlisle.

"Wait, we need to go over some things before tomorrow." He started. "First, Nessie is too young to go hunting."

I started to disagree but realized none of them were going to allow her to come.

"Wait," Emmett smiled. "Do we all get guns tomorrow?"

"No," I started to explain. "I only purchased one, I didn't think you would be into hunting so I didn't see the point in everyone having one."

"Second," Carlisle said getting back on track. "I want everyone to be on their best behavior. I don't want to play doctor when any of my kids get shot tomorrow."

"So what are we hunting?" Jasper asked.

"Bears?" Emmett sounded excited. For someone opposed to hunting he seemed to be getting excited.

Edward looked over at him and coughed trying to hid a laugh.

"It's Deer season." I explained. "Besides, bear meat is too tough."

"I don't know I remember hearing something about nothing being better than an irritable grizzly." Bella laughed.

I glanced over to Carlisle hoping he would explain the inside joke. He just shook his head signaling don't ask.

"Okay, so were hunting deer." Rose said "With guns, and you want us to behave is there anything else or can we go to bed now." I looked closer and realized her hand was sliding into the back of Emmett's panther costume. I began to object but since they were married I reasoned that it was acceptable. Besides Emmett did look rather hot in that costume.

I started thinking of Emmett in and out of that costume. Oh God, what's wrong with me this whole family seems to mesmerize me, like I can't help but be drawn into them.

Edward and Jasper started coughing again, startling me as I lost concentration of my previous thoughts.

"I think bed is a good idea now. I hope we can be up and out of here by five am." I said as I left the living room. I heard Carlisle give them one more stern warning about behaving themselves.

JPOV

"Do you need to go hunt?" Alice asked pulling her head off my chest and looking into my eyes.

"I just went two days ago, I feel okay, do you see anything happening tomorrow." I asked knowing it would be uncertain, we couldn't predict Theresa or the animals decisions for tomorrow.

"You know I don't know for sure," She frowned. "But, I have faith in you." she smiled pulling herself up placing her soft lips on mine.

I closed my eyes and wrapped my arms around her more tightly hoping she was right; amazed by the amount of faith she had in me.

"Is it that you have faith in me or you don't want me to move right now?" I chuckled.

"Both" she sighed moving her mouth down my jaw, her lips kissing and nibbling on my neck and chest.

I flipped her over, the bed beneath us rattled as I pushed my lips to hers. Our hands quickly running over each other's bodies.

"Stop." She whispered putting her finger over my mouth. "You need to go."

I have learned not to argue with Alice, as much as I wanted to stay here in our bed where we belong I knew better. I quickly pulled on my pants and leapt out the window.

I paused for a brief moment before getting to Edwards window. _Whatever you and Bella are doing stop. I'm coming in. _I gave him a quick warning before entering.

"What's going on?" Bella whispered

"Alice just told me to go, I think that means you should get back to your bed as well." I explained.

She gave Edward a quick kiss on the cheek and was out the window.

A few moments later Carlisle came quietly opened the door. "It's three thirty, were all going to have to 'wake up' soon." He whispered. "I just want to remind everyone to be on their best behavior."

Edward and I nodded as he quietly slipped off to talk to Alice and Bella.

"Think he's just jealous?" I asked as I grabbed a book and sat down on the bed.

The past few nights Carlisle has been coming through reminding us of the no sex rule. Obviously he knows we haven't kept it, I think he just likes enforcing it because Esme's not here.

"Could you do it?" Edward asked me.

"No." I didn't have to think about it. I couldn't go two weeks without my Alice. If it weren't for everything that was going when she left after Nessie was born I probably would have lost it.

"I couldn't do it again either." Edward said looking out the window. I could tell he was reflecting on the time he left her. If things didn't work out as they had, if they were still apart, if Edward was still so miserable I think I could never forgive myself.

I spent the next hour reading listening to Edward play quietly as we waited to go hunting.

"Oh no we aren't!" I heard Alice yell, I set my book down and walked out into the hall.

"It's only one day." Theresa was pleading.

I noticed what was in Theresa's hand what was making Alice so upset. She was holding a pair of camouflage overalls.

Edward joined me and we both laughed as Alice refused to wear the overalls. "Just give them here, I want to get today over with." Bella said reaching for a pair of overalls.

"Bella don't" Alice shouted as she grabbed the overalls and slammed the door on Theresa. Theresa glanced over at Edward and I, reached down into a box and threw us some overalls. We exchanged looks, shut the door and changed.

"Jasper Hale take those hideous things off!" Alice screamed from her room.

"Oh no." Edward mumbled "They have a plan."

The upstairs got quiet for a few minutes, I looked over to Edward and saw him shaking his head. I could feel the mischievous activity going around the house. Edward and I walked out of the bedroom to find Emmett in the hall at the top of the stairs. "Rose kicked me out." he looked over to Edward. "What's going on?""You'll see." Edward smiled.

Theresa called up the stairs for us followed by Carlisle's warning to behave and get downstairs. A few seconds later Alice and Bella stepped out the door followed by Rosalie coming down the stairs. My jaw dropped when I saw them. Alice obviously noticed; she smiled, winked and walked past me. "Better hurry up." they said as we turned to watch them walk down the stairs.

"I like this view." Emmett commented.

They had taken the overalls and cut them into shorts, I glanced back again. No, not shorts, skirts. Each wearing a small tan tank top underneath.

"What in the world did you do to those?" Theresa asked, I could feel her anger and I tried to calm her down.

"You didn't think we would wear those ugly things did you?" Rose snapped back.

"It's only sixty degree's out." She looked over to Carlisle, "They'll freeze."

"I'll keep you warm." Emmett said wrapping his arms around Rose.

"Yeah, sure." I mumbled.

"We'll wear jackets." Bella compromised.

We headed out the door. Edward patted Scruffy "Be good." He said as we all laughed. Scruffy growled at him. "I know." Edward laughed. I had a feeling Jake was explaining that it was his daughter's hormones that he had to worry about. He was right judging Nessie's hormones now I could tell this was going to be harder for me to control them in a few months.

I felt Theresa's confusion and tried to sooth her, she must think she's going crazy this week. Well, I can't say it isn't deserved.

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**Okay, I have another new story up....What happens when Bella finds her own La Tua Cantante. How does the family react. Go check it out!**


	30. giving in to instincts

**A/N:**

**I just wanted to say thanks again for all the support and the great reviews. Reviews are becoming like a drug to me. lol **

**For those of you who didn't know my computer was on the fritz so it has been hard to update. Working now! Yay! But having my computer down gave me more time to read fanfic's (on the phone lol such a technology addict) Anyway I had a lot more time to read stories since I couldn't write. You can check out my favorites to see some I have enjoyed reading some have really stuck out. **

**Awaiting Dusk by FayeMcCullen is an exceltent story about a new vampire joining the Cullen family. **

**No Way! by Jamstar4eva shows what happens when a girl wakes up in her favorite book (Twilight of course) **

**Time Changes Nothing by shesinlovewiththeboy Bella and Edward split with suprises when they reunite. **

**And for those of you who like the Sookie Stackhouse Novels, Which if you haven't read i highly recomend the books by Charlaine Harris theres is also a good fanfic~Dead at the moment by Team Jane.**

**I am also going to reccomend my new story Return to Forks. Bella and Edward return to Forks after 82 years. What happens when Bella finds her singer. It includes the whole family plus four grown up pups. (For those of you who read A new addition and Jacob's Pack.) **

**Okay, those are just some of my current favorites that I can't wait to be updated. **

**Thank's again for all the wonderful support. Sorry for such a long Authors Note. And now on with the story!**

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JPOV

We arrived at an area of land reserved specifically for hunting. Well human hunting, or should I say animal hunting for humans. I was familiar with the lay out of the land however we tried not to interfere with area's where humans hunted. Alice and I who had rode with Emmett and Rose got out of the Jeep to meet up with the rest of the family. I couldn't help but laugh when I saw Bella with the baby doll strapped to her back, Edward carrying a diaper bag.

"Okay, First of all I want you to be careful today. No playing around." Theresa started and was interrupted by Emmett.  
"So no playing with the food right?" he asked as we all laughed.

"This is serious." Theresa was getting upset. I sent her some waves of calm and watched as she composed herself. "I have a map of the area and some trails so we don't get lost. There is an area over here." She said pointing to the map. "The guy at the store said this was a good place for deer."  
We started heading down the trail.  
"Keep your eyes out for deer." Theresa reminded us.

"You see anything?" Carlisle asked

There saw a buck a few hundred yards to the northwest. He knew it, I knew it, we all knew except for Theresa.

"No, just wait." Theresa said becoming frustrated.

"I think we might find an Elk." Bella smiled, a quick glance I saw her licking her lips. Leave it to Bella to prefer an herbivore. She was right though, I caught the scent off to the north east.

"Shhh" Theresa pushed her finger to our mouth motioning us to be quiet.

We found the spot she was referring to and set up some of our stuff. Theresa then quietly took the gun and explained to us the basics of gun safety. I stood next to Alice, glancing down I realized just how revealing the outfit she had made really was. The tan tank top cut low revealing her chest. I placed my hand on her back slowly tracing down. Theresa continued to talk but my mind was not with her. I couldn't help but think of Alice and all the things I wanted to do to her.

"Jasper, isn't that just interesting?" my head snapped to Carlisle as I heard him speak.

I had no clue what was being said, I was lost in thought of my sweet Alice. I nodded my head hoping that was the right response.

Alice giggled and I paused realizing the amount of lust that was floating around us.

"Does anyone have any questions?" Theresa asked. I was soon thankful I had missed out on her entire lecture.

Emmett's hand quickly shot up. "When do we actually get to hunt?"

I glanced over at him, we were not supposed to want to hunt.

"Emmett, do you actually want to do this, it's disgusting." Edward said

"Yeah," Bella added. "Do you want to be some kind of monster."

"Well let's just sit back and see what we find." Theresa said looking off to the east.

If only she knew how many animals were around here. I could smell a total of sixteen deer, nine elk, and three bears all within a half a mile radius. Not to mention the doe and fawn I could see slightly to the north of where she was looking.

We sat there for over an hour. Theresa had still not seen a single animal. I could feel the venom burning in my throat from the prolonged exposure to so many animals so close. I fought back the urge to attack.

Forty five minutes later a buck finally crossed into the clearing we were watching. Theresa leapt up quickly and quietly grabbing her gun. She motioned us to come closer.

"Do you see that?" She asked. Well obviously we had all seen it long before her, but we all shook our heads trying to act excited. She picked up the gun and aimed. We circled around her Bella, Edward, and Carlisle standing to her left Rose and Emmett to her right, Alice and I standing slightly back behind her.

I heard her finger move to the trigger, she pulled back.

"No!" Alice shouted reaching for my arm seconds too late.

The gun went off sending a bullet strait into the buck. The scent of blood hit me it was more powerful than simply the smell of the animal. This was the smell I had trained my brain all these years to recognize as food, I was denying myself. I lunged forward colliding strait into Theresa. I was over her, my mind in a frenzy I couldn't differentiate between her and the deer.

"Jazz" I heard Edward, Emmett, and Carlisle call as they quickly pulled me off of her.

I looked up at Carlisle, I could feel his disappointment, my gaze turned to Alice, still processing everything. I looked to Edward, _Sorry _. I thought meeting his gaze before I took off running through the woods reminding myself to keep a human pace.

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**Oh, and if you didn't realize by now I don't own Edward or any of the other characters but he's on my birthday list so if anyone wants to get me anything he's on the top of my list. :)  
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	31. Don't mess with Alice

**Okay thanks again for all the reviews and support **

**A special thanks to my new lil virtual sis FayeMcCullen Below is a link to her story Awaiting Dusk. **

** .net/s/5041356/1/Awaiting_Dusk**

**For those of you that actually read Return to Forks I have decided to rewrite it For the few reviews it did get thanks, something similar will be up again soon.**

**Oh, and I still don't own Edward or any of the other Cullens.**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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TPOV

I placed my finger on the trigger and pulled back, before I could stop myself I heard Alice scream, I know these kids don't agree with the idea of hunting but they didn't have to ruin my chance of hitting this buck.

Everything else happened so quickly. I hit the buck I was sure of that, the next thing I knew Jasper flew into my back landing on me, I heard a low growl deep in his chest. Before I could react I heard Carlisle, Edward and Emmett pull him off of me. He seemed resistant to remove himself from my back. I could feel the three of them struggling to move him. Once he was off I lay there trying to catch my breath taking in the recent events.

"Jasper's a umm…very committed vegetarian." Emmett tried to explain. There was something distrusting about his voice.

This was unacceptable I thought. That was no excuse to attack me, I needed to press charges. I was going to get the hell away from this family and call the police.

Alice was quickly at my side. "You don't want to do that." Alice whispered into my ear as she assisted me back to my feet.

What was she talking about. She couldn't possibly know what I was just planning.

"What do you mean?" I whispered so low, my voice trembling I was uncertain whether she could hear me.

"Let's just say Tim would be sitting in jail right now if my mom had decided to press charges on him. You even think about saying anything I will know." She whispered slowly and confidently into my ear.

Panic struck me, what was happening back home. I knew Tim had some problems but he didn't hurt her did he? Most of all how did she know what was happening back in Florida? I stared blankly at her trying to process everything.

"Theresa, are you okay?" Alice asked sympathetically and loud enough for the camera's.

I stared at her coldly, her gaze met mine warning me to keep quiet.

"Umm, yes," I replied trying to keep calm.

"Theresa, I am so sorry." Carlisle apologized. "Jasper is very sensitive, he doesn't take well to harming animals."

"Yeah, I think he'd rather hunt humans." Emmett commented. I'm sure it was meant to be a joke but there was something to his voice that made me question the comment.

The joke was not taken well by the rest of the family either. This became evident by the glances he received by the rest of the family.

"Enough Emmett," Alice hissed. "I am going to go talk to him." She said walking away from us.

I glanced around taking in my surroundings again. The camera crew stood there filming, almost unfazed by the events. These guys must see all kinds of things so I guess I shouldn't be too surprised. It was their job to film not to interact with us.

Carlisle and Edward stood standing to the side of them if I didn't know better they were having a conversation but no one was talking. It was more like a silent understanding. Realizing I was up Carlisle quickly came up to apologize to me.

"I'm sorry for my son's behavior."

I thought about Alice's words. "It's okay." I mumbled brushing the dirt and leaves off of me.

I turned to look back at the deer as I did I saw a pile of plastic and blue fabric scattered across the ground.

"Bella what happened to your child?" I asked looking at the broken pieces of plastic.

"Well, everything just happened so quickly I was trying to help and the shoulder strap broke and he went flying." Bella explained.

I almost thought she was sympathetic until Edward and her started laughing.

"Aww, Bells," Emmett laughed. "Lets hope you two have some kind of indestructible child"

Carlisle glared over at him. "I think we should be heading back. We will leave the Jeep for Alice and Jasper."

"But…" Emmett started to protest and I had to remind him he shouldn't even be driving his Jeep this week.

JPOV

I didn't look back afraid to see the expressions on their faces; I knew what they were feeling. I ran at an unbearable human pace until I was far enough away, then I tore through the woods. Continuously forcing down the venom burning my throat. I could no longer fight the venom, I shortly crossed paths with the scent of an elk. I made a sharp turn changing course heading for my prey. I spotted it immediately and pounced. The urgency was so great the thrill of the hunt held no appeal.

My thirst quenched I climbed to the top of a large spruce tree and closed my eyes. Memories of Alice and the life she had given me flashed through my mind. The second time, I reminded myself, this was the second time I had allowed myself to put my family in danger. Sure there had been accidents since Alice and I adopted our vegetarian lifestyle but only once like this. I caught Alice's scent she was still a few miles away and judging by the sound of her footsteps she was traveling at an unusually slow pace.

Did I disappoint her for the last time? I couldn't think of loosing her. The thought of loosing her brought me back to Bella's birthday, yes it was bad but not as bad as this, this would have exposed us on film. I cleared those thoughts and reminded myself not to think so casually about her birthday that way around Edward.

Alice was getting closer but she should have been here by now. Did she want me to come to her? I don't think I can face her now, not if she's going to leave me. My thoughts traveled back to Bella how she was actually sympathetic towards me after everything had settled down. She understood it was simply in my nature.

I was lost in thought when I felt my sweet angel sit down on my lap resting her head on my chest. I opened my eyes and looked down at her almost scared to speak. I leaned down and gently kissed her forehead waiting for her reaction. She looked up, our eyes met and a smile formed on her face. In that second I knew everything would be fine.

"What took you so long?"

"I saw you needed some time, if I would have come earlier you would have still been angry." she said snuggling in closer to me.

"Alice, I'm so sorry. How are we going to explain this?"

"Don't worry about it" She flashed me an evil grin. "She had planned on pressing charges but I told her if she did Esme would press charges on Tim."

"Wait, you aren't supposed to know about that."  
"Oh I know." She smiled again "But she's scared shitless she won't say anything."

"And you did this all without the camera seeing?"

"Oh yes, I looked real polite when I helped her up, my back was facing the camera so I just whispered it into her ear."

I squeezed her tighter and laughed. "What happened to my sweet little angel?"

"Nobody messes with my husband." She said before raising herself up to kiss me.


	32. The last day of the swap

**A/N: Okay Sorry, I don't know if it was the sun or simply being too tired, I proof read the last chapter and then when I posted it I don't know what happened. **

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed to let me know something wasn't right. **

**Sorry it's not a new chapter, next one should be up soon. **

**As always I don't own anything.**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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EPOV

"Your back early!" Nessie exclaimed meeting us at the door.

__

What went wrong?

__

Jasper! He didn't

I nodded my head

__

Everything's okay though right?

I nodded my head, I was about to pull him aside when Theresa interrupted.

"I want to see the tape!"

__

I know she did something with that damn doll, I need to see that tape.

I let out a sigh of relief when I realized that she was more concerned with that damn baby.

"I saw everything." Carlisle assured her trying to stall her from replaying tape. "Nothing was intentional, I don't think we need to relive it."

"No, I want to see what SHE did!" she shouted pointing at Bella.

"Oh" Carlisle chuckled realizing she was more concerned with Bella destroying a plastic doll than being attacked by a vampire.

__

Wait, what she did? What did momma do? Where's aunt Alice and uncle Jasper?

"Bella killed the doll." he laughed.

"No! Not Kadidu." Nessie cried running over to Jake.

I watched as Jake uncomfortably put his arm around her trying to console her.

__

I was just starting to like the idea of the baby, I mean who knows if I can have kids or what a child between me and Jake would be like could it live? Not that it matters Jake will never see me as anything but a little sister. All day I've been trying to get him to notice me. I stayed in my pajama's all morning since it's more revealing than anything daddy lets me wear.

A small growl vibrated my chest as I glanced over at my little girl.

__

Sorry daddy

Poor Jake just stood there looking awkward and confused. _What?_

Meanwhile Theresa had convinced the film crew to playback the video so she could reexamine the tape.

"There!" She shouted. "Come look at this." She motioned us to the TV.

We watched her firing the gun. The camera shot to the dead buck while we heard Theresa scream. Cut back to Jasper on Theresa's back as Carlisle, Emmett and I pulled him off. Off to the left hand side of the screen the baby doll began to cry, Bella pulled the shoulder pack off, glanced at the doll and threw it to the ground smashing it into hundreds of tiny pieces.

"It annoyed me." Bella shrugged after watching the tape.

I quickly moved over to her and wrapped my arms around her. "Don't worry love, I'm sure our child will be less destructible and better behaved." I glanced over at Nessie for the last part.

"Are you all crazy?" Theresa shouted "Carlisle, I sure hope you get these children some counseling that bitch is crazy!" She said pointing her finger at Bella.

I felt Bella squeeze my hand reminding me not to kill the psycho bitch mom.

"I…" Carlisle was quickly interrupted by the smallest voice in the room.

"Excuse me!" Nessie yelled getting everyone's attention. "Being the youngest in this family I feel like I have been raised by everyone. My parents, siblings, Jake, they all work together and they are great, they always love me and support me, there's nothing wrong with this family."

"Beside's the fact that were all dead?" I heard Jasper whisper quietly enough only the undead could hear.

I couldn't help but laugh, not just at his joke but out of relief to have my brother back. In the end I forgave him for Bella's birthday party just as he knew I would forgive him now.

__

Sorry about that

Jasper's thoughts caught my attention. _Edward, what the hell was going on in here, these emotions, I feel like I am a strait guy in a gay club. All this lust, confusion, anger? _

"Ness, Jake, Theresa and Bella" I whispered to him so he could identify the places these emotions were coming from.

__

Oh Man, I had been waiting for Nessie to make a move I could feel her emotions around Jake changing over the past month, it keeps escalading. What happened today, Alice said Ness wouldn't do anything today.

I shook my head and let Jasper focus on calming everyone down.

"Well it's Theresa's last day, what do you suppose we should do?" Carlisle asked trying to keep peace and change the subject.

"Well I could go for some breakfast." Theresa suggested.

"Sounds good." Jake and Nessie, Being the only ones' who ate agreed.

"Umm, I already grabbed something." Jasper explained. "You mind if Alice and I go umm work on some homework?"

Carlisle nodded and I knew I needed some kind of excuse to get out of this meal.

__

Think Emmett, you can't be left to have a meal with this bitch. Find some sort of Excuse before Edward, No way Carlisle's going to let all of us out of eating. Won't look right. Think, think, think.

"Theresa, I think Bella and I need to have a conversation about our recently departed child." I explained pulling Bella out of the room. To my surprise Theresa nodded in agreement.

__

Damn you Edward!

I heard Emmett's thoughts but ignored him as I took Bella up the stairs. _Stupid mind reading vampire, I know you hear me, don't you feel bad for leaving your brother and sister down here._

Not at all I thought as I laid Bella down on the bed.

"You wanted to talk to me about our recently departed baby?" She giggled under me.

"Yeah, about that maybe we should work on having another one." I suggested my hands tearing at her shirt.

"Hmmm, that might take a while." she giggled.

"I've got forever." I smiled.

"So do I." she smiled wrapping her arms around me and bringing her lips to mine.

Nessie's thoughts were so confused. I was going to answer but Emmett beat me to it. I turned my attention to Jake trying to give him a 'don't ask' look. I watched him as he looked around and noticed what two of our family were missing. 


	33. Sorry, Just an Authors Note, Please Read

**Okay, First of all thank you to everyone for being so supportive of the story. Sorry it has taken me a while to update. I am also sorry I haven't had time to read and review a lot of my favorite stories. I promise i will get to them. **

**The good news is I am almost done with the next chapter Hopefully up tomorrow. I had some questions as to whether or not I had stopped writing. It will be continued just been busy.**

**BTW~Don't you just hate it when you see your favorite stories have been updated only to find out it's just an authors note. **

**LOL~ I'm that bitch now!**


	34. The Bet

**A/N: Okay so YAY me I got the story up sooner than expected!**

**Not to mention I think I got rid of some of the writers block. I know I promised Esme's POV but this chapter got a little longer than planned so Esme will be in the next chapter. (Which will hopefully be up very quickly.)**

**Thank's to everyone for the great reviews and motivation. It helps me write quicker *hint hint* **

**And since I am not currently dreaming I own nothing.**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~ **

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TPOV

"Foods up" I said placing the last few bowls on the table. I smiled at Carlisle as I sat down to eat brunch.

"Thank you Theresa." Carlisle said smiling at me as he scooped some food onto his plate.

"Yeah, Thanks." Nessie replied taking a bite of eggs.

I looked over at Jake who was too busy eating to bother talking; meanwhile Emmett and Rosalie sat their staring at their plates.

"So, I bet your ready to get back to Tim and your kids." Rosalie said pushing her food around on her plate.

"Yeah." I lied. The truth was I was really enjoying it here. Sure they were sort of crazy and I could never live like they do and I missed my children but I didn't want to go home to Tim. Being here letting me be in control for a week has changed me. I want to find a man like Carlisle.

Carlisle would never hurt me, never yell at me, beat me, force himself upon me. I've never met a kinder man, a man so soft spoken and gentle, not to mention so handsome. He is the perfect man.

"So, Theresa, what are you thinking about?" I nearly jumped out of my chair at Edwards question. Wait, where did he come from?

"Umm…" Was the only sound I could manage to get out of my mouth.

"It's just that you looked like you were lost in thought about something." He added. I looked up to see a small smile form on his face.

What's going on here, was I staring at Carlisle, does he suspect something. If he does he doesn't seem too upset maybe they do like me, I wonder if he would leave Esme?

Edward seemed to disappear as quickly as he entered the room. I looked around at the rest of the family, maybe I could talk to Carlisle, see if the feelings were mutual.

After brunch Nessie was kind enough to help me with dishes.

"So, I bet your ready to have your mom back?" I asked.

She just kind of looked at me, almost like she forgot Esme was gone.

"Oh yeah" she smiled.

Hmm, maybe it wouldn't be as hard to get rid of Esme as I thought. I decided to go talk to Carlisle. I found him at the big desk in his study. He looked so good sitting there, I could just see myself on his lap my arms wrapped around him.

"Hey dad, I just needed to get a book." Edward again appeared as if out of nowhere behind me and again he had that same smirk on his face.

Once I was sure Edward had left I approached Carlisle.

"Are you happy?" I asked sitting in large chair next to his desk.

"Yes." he answered. "Are you?"

"At times." I sighed.

"When are you unhappy?" He asked it took nothing more than his sweet gentle voice to calm me.

"I," I started to speak and then paused. "My marriage, it isn't what it seems."

"What is wrong in your marriage?"

"It's just Tim, he is very controlling." I started to continue and looked up into his beautiful golden eyes. "he, he, oh God Carlisle he treats me like shit." I cried burying my hands in my face.

He didn't say anything for a moment, just let me sit there and cry. It felt good to get it out, after a few minutes I could feel myself being calmed down.

"I think you should take this experience and realize you are strong enough to move on from him." Carlisle suggested.

I sat there trying to decide what to say, how to react. All of a sudden I had this urge to run over and jump into his arms. The camera was watching us, it was not rational. I sat trying to fight the urge the feelings were too great and I couldn't hold back anymore. I got up and quickly walked over to the desk. Moving his chair back I sat down on his lap and wrapped my arms around his neck.

Before I could say anything I saw the door to the study open.

"Jasper, out!" I heard Carlisle yell.

Wait, he wanted him out of here, this is good, that means he isn't upset I am on his lap, he wants privacy.

"Theresa, I'm sorry your emotions have been played with." Carlisle apologized.

"No, really I want you." I begged. "I can't deny my feelings for you."

Before I knew it Carlisle wrapped his arms around me, but before I could react he swiftly removed me from his lap lifting me to my feet he set me down next to him.

"This is highly inappropriate." His voice remaining calm and gentle. Maybe he was just doing this because of the camera.

"It's okay," I whispered. "We can talk when the camera's are gone." I smiled and winked hoping he would realize what I was talking about.

There was a knock on the door, quickly Carlisle turned away from me walking towards the door.

CPOV

I hurried to the door as quick as humanly possible. I was too caught up with Theresa to pay attention to who was at the door. I opened the door to find she had already left.

"Excuse me Theresa. I am just going to go check on the kids. Maybe you could use this time to talk to the camera, sometimes just releasing some of these feelings can help." I suggested.

I caught Bella's scent lingering in the hall. Had she been the one to knock? Poor Bella she had only had a few years with Edward and now she would have to watch me kill him. He had been messing with Theresa since this morning, damn mind reading son. I walked upstairs knowing I couldn't actually harm any of my kids but I could get even.

I stopped at the door to Alice's room, Alice knowing I was coming quickly opened the door.  
"Family meeting upstairs now." I said in a voice sterner than I have used in years.

"Now might not be a good time to interrupt Rose and Em." she said as I walked away.

"I don't care, just get up there." I figured we would have the most privacy in their room.

Edward opened the door to his room as he and Jasper stepped out. Edward looked at me apologetically as he walked by; Jasper tried calming me as he followed Edward.

"Now." I said not wanting to deal with either of them now.

I paused for a moment to think before joining them upstairs. I heard Rose yelling obviously upset by them barging in on them. I don't think Rose and Emmett were in on this, I should feel bad granted their marriage had gotten them around it rule number one was no sex.

I need Esme here with me it's too hard to plot anything against a mind reader, psychic, and a son who can manipulate emotions. Frustrated I sighed and headed upstairs.

"Carlisle, why is everyone up here?" Rose snarled once I entered the room.

"They didn't tell you?"

"We don't know" They all said in unison.

Yeah, and I was born yesterday. "So Edward, you didn't listen to Theresa's thoughts and make her think it was okay to hit on me?"

He just stared at me.

"And Jasper you didn't play with her emotions, I could feel the room fill with lust right before she pounced on me."  
"Ha! I win!" Emmett exclaimed.

What? "You win?" I asked.

"Oh, nothing." Emmett said quickly

"We had a bet on who could push Theresa over the edge." Rose explained.

"Babe, just because you lost…" Emmett sighed.

"Rose, I tried telling you." Alice laughed.

"But Nessie helped too." Edward interrupted. "I sort of played on what I overheard her and Nessie talking about."  
"What are you talking about?" Bella glared at him. My little granddaughter surely couldn't be involved in this.

"Theresa asked her if she missed her mom." Edward explained "Ness didn't realize she was talking about Esme at first and it took her a minute to reply giving Theresa the impression that she didn't miss Esme. I just used that along with not acting like I had a problem with her checking you out to get her to think it was okay to hit on you."

"So Edward did it. I should win!" Emmett said jumping in Rose's face.

"Enough!" I yelled.

"Carlisle," Bella interrupted. "I tried getting you out of there." Bella apologized. I smiled she had nothing to do with this but still felt the need to apologize. Maybe there was hope.

"Okay," I said composing myself. "We have one more night and Theresa will be gone and Esme will be home. Can we just get through tonight."

"Can we have a movie night?" Bella asked.

"I don't care." I sighed more mentally exhausted than I had been in years.

"By the way." I asked curiously "What were you betting on?" I could tell by the look between Emmett and Rose it was something I didn't want to know about.

"Never mind" I laughed as I walked out of the room.


	35. Movie Night

**A/N: Okay again many thanks for all the positive reviews.  
I think I cured the writers block (Considering this chapter is twice as long as I expected.)**

**Warning there are spoilers for the movie Silver Bullet if you haven't seen it I highly recomend it (but of course I love crappy 80's horror)**

**And again I don't own anything.**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy**

**

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**BPOV**

"Bella, That's just wrong." Alice giggled as we went down to watch the movie I picked with the rest of the family.

"It should get some good laughs though." I smiled

"Not as good as the ones from the movie Jake picked out." Alice replied. "And no, I'm not telling."

We got downstairs and I put the movie in and took my seat next to Edward on the couch while Carlisle sat at the opposite end. Theresa took a recliner while Emmett and Rose curled up on the loveseat. Jasper and Rose sat with Nessie and Jake on the floor.

The opening scene played and I laughed as Jake groaned.

"What movie are we watching?" Theresa asked.

"Silver Bullet" Nessie laughed.

"Wait, isn't that about werewolves?" Theresa asked. "I think it's a little too scary for Nessie."

I giggled, a good parent would probably agree but ever since Emmett and her watched it a few years ago it has become a joke.

"Renesmee always cries at the end." I laughed.

"So it is too scary." Theresa turned to Nessie "It's okay if you don't want to watch it, I don't want you to be scared." She assured her.  
"She cries because she's sad when the werewolf dies." Emmett laughed.

"I don't know why, he's nothing but another mutt." Rose sneered.

We sat and watched the movie, I noticed Theresa occasionally covering her eyes and I couldn't help but laugh, if only she knew.

The movie finally came to the part where the werewolf comes flying in through the window. Theresa jumped as we all laughed and made comments on the bad costume and makeup. The scene where the wolf is shot, suddenly she leapt over burying her head in Jake's chest.

Edward's grip tightened on me as he growled quietly.

"Wait, you don't cry when the old man or the kids die but you cry when the monster does?" Theresa asked.

Nessie quickly realized her proximity to Jake and backed away. "Maybe he's just misunderstood." she told Theresa.

"Only your daughter wouldn't be able to see the werewolf as a monster." Edward whispered into my ear.

"Okay, my movies next." Jake said hopping up to switch out the DVD's.

"You picked Buffy the vampire slayer?" I could barely restrain my laughter.  
"Another scary movie?" Theresa asked.

"No, this one isn't actually scary." Alice explained.

"Alice reminds me of Buffy." Jake Laughed.

"Yes, because I run around in my spare time staking vampires." Alice rolled her eyes.

"Oh please, like that's all it would take?" Emmett laughed.

"No because of her personality and shopping habit." Jake explained.

"It's not like they are real anyway so can we just watch the movie before a fight breaks out over this." Carlisle suggested.

I snuggled back up to Edward as we laughed at all the myths of vampires. I noticed Theresa covering her eyes at a few points and couldn't help but laugh.  
"Scared?" I asked.

"I don't like scary things."

If she only knew. I placed my head on Edwards shoulder and continued watching the movie. I watched as Buffy drove a stake through the heart of a vampire.

"Woohoo!" Jake cheered.

He was quickly stopped by jab in the shoulder by Nessie.

"What you like vampires too?" Theresa asked her.  
"I guess." Nessie smiled choosing her words carefully. "I mean who's to say they are all bad."

"Carlisle. I think you need to have a discussion with your daughter. Explain to her these things are fantasy. There is no such thing as werewolves and vampires." Theresa said shaking her head.

"Oh, I think Nessie knows the difference between reality and fantasy, don't you?" Carlisle smiled.

"That's right!" Emmett screamed running back into the room. He stopped in front of the TV looking at all of he smiled revealing his set of plastic fangs.

"Em, sit down and shut up." Rose hissed.

"You two will continue counseling after I'm gone I hope." Theresa asked them.

We sat and watched the remainder of the movie in silence. Jake got up to turn the movie and I caught him glancing at Renesmee.

"So, Renesmee you cry when the wolf mutt dies but you didn't shed a single tear when all those vampires were killed." Edward smiled at our daughter.

"She must like them better." Jake smiled cockily.

I could feel Edwards chest vibrate, restraining a growl. I squeezed his hand and turned over to Theresa.

"It's getting late, you and dad have an early plane to catch, maybe we should all get to sleep."

She nodded her head in agreement. "I just want to say that this has been an umm…experience. I hope I made some kind of impact on your family. I know I will take back some of the things I learned here and try to improve my family." She paused for another moment. "You know, your family's situation is so complex and sure everyone has their little quirks but deep down you guys really love each other and take care of one another. It's the one thing that my family is missing."

Okay, as much as she drove me crazy I really was starting to feel bad for her. Not that I couldn't wait to get rid of her though.

"Thank you as well Theresa." Carlisle said. "There is plenty you have taught our family as well."

It took all we had to stop from laughing, I gave Carlisle credit for keeping a strait face. If anything she gave us some entertainment the past two weeks.

We all said our goodnights and apologized in advance if we did not 'wake up' in time to see them off to the airport.

**EsPOV**

Just eighteen more hours until I would see my Carlisle. The past two weeks ranked closely to the worst in my life. Well easily the worst in my life with him. At least I was getting out of the hotel for a few hours tonight. The crew arranged for Tim to go to an AA meeting this evening while I went and said goodbye to the kids. I wanted to make sure that I let them know things would work out. I would make sure things worked out for them; not that I could tell them my plan. I want to tell them how much I fell in love with them in the short time I was able to spend with them, tell them what good kids they were.

I closed my eyes hoping for the best as I reached for the car door.

"Esme!" I was greeted by the kids.

"Kristi, Sean, Jenny, Noah!" I ran up and hugged each of them.

We went inside and I asked them all to sit down and talk to me. I wanted to get as much in in this hour as possible.

"How's your week been?" I paused "Without your mom here I mean. Your dad's been treating you alright?"

"Dad's never hit us." Sean said defensively.

"That's good." I assured him.

"No he takes it all out on mom." Kristi mumbled.

I quickly realized this was not a conversation Jenny and Noah needed to be involved in. "Jenny would you and Noah go play upstairs for a little while?" I asked.

They quietly and obediently went upstairs. My 'kids' weren't even kids and they didn't listen this well. Once they were out of earshot I continued. "Kristi, Sean, I need you two to be strong for your mom."

Kristi nodded but I could tell Sean was too close to his dad. He sat there arms crossed staring at me.

"Sean, please, think of your brother and your sisters." I tried to reason. "This isn't anyway for them to grow up either. You and Kristi are going to be in college soon. Who is going to look after them then?"

I could see the worry in his eyes as reality hit him.

"So what? Mom need's to leave dad? She'll never do it." Kristi shrugged.

"Don't worry about that sweetheart, maybe she won't leave him, maybe she will help him get help. Either way I have a feeling everything will work out. Now why don't you go get your sister and brother and we can spend some time together."

I smiled as I watched them all come running back down the stairs. "What do you guys want to do?"

"Can we watch Spongebob?" Noah asked.

"Yay!" Jenny exclaimed.

"Daddy hasn't let us watch TV since you left and after tomorrow it's going to be gone for good." Kristi explained.

We all sang along. "Who lives in a pineapple under the sea…Spongebob square pants. Absorbent and yellow and porous is he…Spongebob square pants. His nautical nonsense be something you wish…Spongebob square pants."

Singing along made me miss Nessie, I wonder how much she's grown in two weeks. I could tell her feelings for Jake were beginning to change before I left, I wonder how everyone was handling things. Hopefully everyone was still alive. Well not alive but well still animated.

The time I had with them wasn't nearly enough, Tim arrived back before the Spongebob episode was over.

"Okay crazy voodoo witch, time to go." He yelled at me as he walked in the door.

I quickly gave the kids a hug trying to get out of there to spare them having to hear his insults. Your days are numbered Tim, I thought as I smiled politely walking past him.

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**Yes this is the last day of the swap but if you haven't figured it out yet it is not nearly the end of the story. **

**Now go hit that little green and white button below the story and let me know what you think! **


	36. The reunion

**A/N: First of all thanks for all the great reviews from the last chapter. Reviews have become like a drug to me so keep me supplied. :)**

**This chapter is sort of just a quick little filler, it was going to go with the next chapter but it was making it too long. **

**Oh, and sadly I still don't own anything. **

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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CPOV

We arrived in LA for the reunion. Esme was here! It took everything I had to make myself get into the Limo and make it all the way to the studio where I would officially be reunited with here. She was within a mile of me, I could smell her, they probably had our planes come in at similar times.

"Carlisle?" Theresa said shaking me out of my daze.

"Yeah"

"Are you okay?"

"I'm sorry I was just thinking about seeing Esme again." I could see the pain in Theresa's eyes as I said that. The whole way here she had been quiet. I wonder how badly Tim really did treat her.

TPOV

I sat across from Carlisle in the limo. He looked so excited to be seeing Esme again. I wish I could say the same for Tim. My thoughts wandered back to Alice's words. What had he done while I was gone. I started thinking of how my kids handled the weekend. Hopefully she didn't corrupt them. Who knows maybe I will get back and Kristi will be pregnant, Sean will have gotten married, Jenny will be on drugs, and Noah will have run away. Maybe Tim's firm hand on me in sighting fear in them has worked to their benefit. They were much better behaved than the Cullen's children. I just want to see Tim.

TimPOV

I got to the Limo to find Esme already there.

"No way am I riding to the studio with her." I said to the camera guy.

"Please Tim," Nick begged. "I will be in the back with the two of you the whole way."

"No" I said turning away from the limo.

"Tim, Really I am riding in the limo for Esme's protection." Nick said.  
"That crazy bitch doesn't need protection. She threatened me." I screamed.

"Really Tim, you were drunk, you were hallucinating." Esme said calmly.

No, I know what I saw, you can't play innocent. I may have been drunk but I'm not crazy. After a few phone calls they arranged to have another limo come and pick me up. It was going to be bad enough having to sit through a conversation with her and her husband.

Oh shit, her husband. Esme never specified if he was a big guy or not, what would he do when he found out what I did to his wife?

EsPOV

I got into the limo with Nick who had become a very good friend to me the past week. I felt bad for him having to deal with everything he had over the past week. Carlisle was already here I caught his scent as we were coming through the airport. I hope Theresa wasn't as crazy as she seemed. On second thought I hope my own children didn't make her any crazier. Edward and Alice seemed to have kept their word by not telling him what was happening to me over the past week. Hopefully he wouldn't overreact in front of all the camera's when he found out. The limo pulled into a parking lot; I saw another one a couple hundred feet away. The camera exited the car and after a quick call Nick looked over to me.

"Go get your husband." he smiled.

"Aren't we waiting for Tim?" I asked.

"No, the producers actually like this version better. Make him come off as even more of an ass." Nick laughed.

"You shouldn't have any problem with that." I winked.

I paused before opening the door reminding myself to keep myself human. I opened the door and took off running, within seconds I saw him. It was so good to see his face, I was glad I couldn't cry because I would surly be in tears right now. I jumped up into him wrapping legs around his waist. I felt his arms embrace me.

"I love you." I cried tearlessly into his shoulder.

"Esme, I missed you so." I lifted my head up to his as we kissed.

"Ummm, Excuse me?" Theresa interrupted us.

The kiss ended and Carlisle gently set me down quickly protectively wrapping his arms around me as we turned to Theresa.

"Where's Tim?"

"He's coming. He refused to ride in the same limo as me. I think however that we should wait until he gets here to discuss the reasons why."

"You stupid bitch, what have you done to my husband?" Theresa shouted at me.

"I think you should ask him what he did to me." I said coldly. I immediately felt bad for my family having to live with this woman for the past two weeks.

"What do you mean what he did to you?" Carlisle hissed. "I'm going to kill him." he said softly enough only I could hear.

I wrapped his hands in mine "Calm down" I tried to calm him. Where was Jasper when you needed him.

After a few minutes of silence Tim's limo arrived. He came flying out of the car as Theresa ran into his arms. I shuddered at the memories of Tim's behavior wondering how anyone could love someone like that.

Nick came over and shook Carlisle's hand as he introduced himself.

"Are we ready to go inside and do the sit down?" He asked.


	37. The sit down

**A/N: And finally...the sit down. How does Carlisle react? **

**Okay, this is not by far the last chapter. I keep thinking of more things to add. Such as We need to find out how the rest of the Cullens describe their experience's to Esme. They need to watch themselves on TV, and yes, someone in the Cullen Family will go back and pay another visit to our friend Tim....Who will it be??? (Might not be who you think) **

**Okay So I am still in total shock over all the reviews I have gotten in the past few days. You like me you really like me *Wipes tear from eye* **

**Thank you so much and keep them coming!**

**Oh, and because I don't want to get involved in any copywrite infringement I own nothing. (Although, if I were to be in a lawsuit maybe I could meet Stephenie Meyer.)  
Okay Probably not the thinking of a sane person. Just read the story :)**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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CPOV

We were ushered to a small room with a table and four chairs. I pulled Esme's chair for her and gave Tim a look of disgust as I noticed him sit down before Theresa. I guess I could be called old fashioned but that's just simple manners. The four of us sat there looking at each other for a moment waiting for someone to speak. After two weeks with her I should have known it would be Theresa.

"I just want to say anything without being interrupted." She said her eyes glairing at Esme. "First of all you do have a wonderful family. They could actually be decent kids. Emmett and Rose went to marriage counsel-"

"WHAT?" Esme shouted. I grabbed her hand and looked over at her.

"Umm…Emmett and Rose got married last month and didn't tell us. It wasn't until Theresa discovered Emmett's intimacy problems that they came out and told us they were actually married." I explained knowing Esme would be smart enough not to ask anything else until we were alone.

"Can I please speak without being interrupted." Theresa said impatiently.

"Could I please have a moment to take in the fact that two of my children are married?" Esme surprisingly snapped back. What happened to my sweet wife?

"Look, I'm sorry, I should have let Carlisle tell you about that but he didn't seem to care too much so I figured neither would you." Theresa continued. "That brings me to my main problem with your family. Your children seem to just take care of themselves. I mean Nessie basically home schools herself."  
"Well Nessie has always seemed to mature rather quickly." Esme said defensively.

"I asked not to be interrupted." Theresa shot back at her.

I squeezed Esme's hand begging her to just get through this meeting. I was becoming furious with Theresa and just wanted everyone to stay calm.

"Well, as I was saying. Your kids need more direction. I got Jasper and Edward to play football and Bella and Alice did cheerleading."  
With that Esme began laughing. I know she was imaging Bella as a cheerleader. Theresa paused and looked at Esme.

"I'm sorry I was just having a hard time seeing Bella in a cheerleading uniform."

"She wasn't too happy." I explained. "But Alice was in heaven."

Esme looked over at Theresa, "Bella used to be extremely clumsy but as she umm…grew out of it she just never had the cheerleader attitude."

"She does have a bit of an attitude problem doesn't she?" Theresa said. "But I think Edward is good for her. They have a very strange relationship."

I wondered what she meant by strange but decided that I shouldn't ask. No need to push the issue I knew they had a strange relationship. I glanced over at Esme she didn't seem too shocked to know that four of our kids were now dating each other.

"Alice and Jasper are the ones I think are going to make it though." Theresa added. "They have a strong quiet relationship."

I looked over at Esme who was now slightly surprised none of the children had been able to follow the rules.

"And Jake, at first I didn't like him. I couldn't understand why he was so interested in spending time with Renesmee. But then he explained the situation with his girlfriend. How he was waiting for her to finish school and everything. I wish I could have met her but he really isn't a bad guy. Although I think you need to watch Renesmee, I think she has a bit of a crush on him."

Esme let out a sigh of relief hoping she could speak her peace and be done with this. I was hoping for the same. That is until Theresa began speaking again.

"The only thing I will suggest is Emmett and Rose continue marriage counseling and Jasper gets some anger management."  
I could feel Esme tense as she hoped that Jasper hadn't attacked her. "What happened?" She whispered.

"We went hunting, I know Carlisle explained to me what a devout vegetarian he was but the second I shot the deer he jumped on me."  
Esme gasped

Theresa continued. "I know he felt bad he ran off and wouldn't talk to anyone after but still, it's no reason to attack me."

Esme let out a sigh of relief.

"What do you mean he attacked you?" Tim said angrily.

"I'm okay." Theresa told him. Probably thinking that it was no worse than the way he attacked her everyday at home.

"No, it's not right. Did you press charges?" Tim continued.

"Tim, do you want me to press charges?" Esme asked.

What? I cringed, I knew things were bad but he actually touched her? Did something to my wife that would be punishable by law? I took a moment to regain myself thankfully I had three hundred years to work on my patience and control.

"What happened." I asked surprised my voice sounded incredibly calm.

"I think Tim should explain." Esme said moving her hand and placing it on my knee.

"Yes." Theresa said trying not to sound too defiant. Tim would probably go home and beat her if she stood up to him.

"I…" Tim paused. "I missed you baby." Tim said turning towards Theresa. I felt Esme's hand grasp my knee tighter reminding me not to leap out of my seat. "I missed you and I was lonely, I sort of made a pass at her." Tim sobbed as he rubbed his eyes giving the impression he was crying.

I couldn't move, my whole body stiffened. How dare he.

"Do you want to explain to her why I was already staying at a hotel when all this happened." Esme asked him.

She had to stay at a hotel? My poor Esme, at the hotel, alone, for over a week. Wait, why was she at the hotel before he hit on her.

"Why was she at the hotel?" I asked this time with a little more anger in my voice.

"I got upset with her and raised my hand to her. It was nothing." Tim said rather nonchalantly.

I thought back to Esme's human years the abuse she had taken by her first husband. I wanted more than nothing to wrap her in my arms.

"It was nothing?" I asked not even trying to hide the anger in my voice.

"Look, I didn't actually hit her." he tried to reason with me.

I couldn't do this anymore. I glanced over at Esme and smiled, I wanted her to know I wasn't going to rip his head off, but I needed to get out of the room. I slowly stood and excused myself. I was surprised when Esme stayed and continued talking to Theresa.

"Theresa," I heard Esme as I walked out the door. "I just wanted you to know that although I had problems with Tim your children are wonderful. Please don't forget that, do what is best for them."

"If you looked up asshole in the dictionary you'd see a picture of him." I looked up surprised to see Nick. "Sorry, That was unprofessional."

"No, it's okay." I faked a laughed. "I just feel bad, she had a horrible experience."

"If it makes you feel any better she kicked my ass in gin rummy quite a few times." he laughed and this time I joined him.

"Seriously, she handled it really well, between everything with Tim and her mother dying." Nick said.

Her mother dying? What? I tried not to reveal the shock on my face.

"Yes, it was something we knew was coming. They said their goodbyes before Esme left." I said hoping the story worked. I didn't want to make it look like Esme didn't care her mother died but I didn't know what to say. Why had she told them that?

"Thanks Nick, for everything." I said shaking his hand.

"No problem, it was sort of like a vacation for me, not having to deal with all the other family members." He smiled.

I would be eternally thankful to this man for helping my wife I thought as I walked back into the room.

EsPOV

"Theresa, I just wanted you to know that although I had problems with Tim your children are wonderful. Please don't forget that, do what is best for them."

"And by do what is best for them you mean leave me?" Tim asked.

"I'm not telling her what to do." I explained. "I just want her to know there are options." I wanted so badly to tell her my story. How I had gotten out of my abusive marriage. Granted things didn't turn out quite right there either but if I still had my son things would have been different. Theresa had children though, she needed to be strong for them.

"Options to leave me." Tim was getting angry again. "Is that what you want? Theresa, do you want to leave me?"

"No," She whispered.

Carlisle came back into the room and instead of sitting down he stood behind me reassuringly placing his hands on my shoulders.

"I love you." Theresa whispered to Tim. I watched as they embraced each other, watched the tears stream down Theresa's face as she repeatedly told Tim how much she loved him.

"I'm out of here." I said pushing back my chair, Carlisle was immediately at my side as we walked out the door.

I wasn't tired but simply emotionally drained as we boarded the plane. "So what really happened?" I whispered as I placed my head on Carlisle's shoulder. It felt right being back at his side. I thought of all the things Theresa had said, trying to imagine what was really going on but in the end I just wanted to be with my husband, to sit quietly and enjoy his presence.

"Oh, I think it would be best to let your children explain that." He chuckled. I sighed and nodded my head as I closed my eyes. As bad as my two weeks were I'm sure his experience had to have been more stressful.


	38. Home

**A/N: Okay, yes, I know this chapter is incredibly short but it seemed like the best point to break it off.**

**I didn't want Esme to find out everything when the camera's are still rolling. I plan on going back to the funniest moments and having the rest of them relive them with Esme in the next chapter and then let Esme tell them about her experience in the chapter after that. If anyone has any suggestions for their favorite moments let me know and I will try to add it in.**

**Okay, well again I still don't own anything. Except Jazz, well we found a stray dog and his tag said Jazz, after an afternoon of calls and driving around we think he was dumped. So I guess now I own Jazz.**

**BTW~ I hit over four hundred reviews. YAY! Thank you guys so much. **

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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EsPOV

We arrived at the house, it felt amazing to be home. To be with my family again; to know that in a few hours the camera's would be gone and we could be ourselves again. I had to remember to use a human speed again as we walked up to the house. Alice came flying out of the house in her cheerleading uniform. I couldn't help but laugh.

"Mom!" She exclaimed wrapping her arms around me. "Bella wouldn't wear hers." She snorted as she stepped back to let me see her in her uniform.

"Your lucky I wore it at all." Bella snapped at her as she ran up to give me a hug. "Mommy!" Emmett yelled running up to me he picked me up and flung his arms around me. Thankfully I was indestructible, otherwise he would have crushed me.

"Okay Em, you have to share." Rose said slapping his shoulder. He let me down and I gave Rose a hug.

"So, you two are married now?" I asked, they both looked ashamed like they should have told me sooner. Wow, are they going for the Oscar?

"We knew it would happen eventually." I smiled as Carlisle wrapped his arm around me. "Your father was explaining to me you went to marriage counseling, I think we need to continue that rule." I winked holding back a laugh as the two of them groaned.

"We missed you." Edward sighed as he hugged me.

"I'm sorry." Jasper whispered quietly. Was it because of the incident with Theresa, or sending in the tape in the first place? There was no way for any of them to know how things would work out. Well maybe Alice, but I can't expect her to know everything either. In the end I was glad that I had the opportunity. Maybe I could still help those kids. I ignored Jaspers apology and gave him a hug.

"Don't." I whispered. "Everything happens for a reason." I winked.

My favorite granddaughter was next. I could have sworn she had grown in the past two weeks. How would we pass this off when the camera's came back in two more weeks?

"Oh," I paused looking at the wolf behind her.

"We decided to let Scruffy stay in the house." Carlisle explained to me.

"Oh, Scruffy." I bent down and patted him on the head. Why had Jake changed and why did we call him Scruffy? What the hell happened while I was gone?

"So, tell me what happened while I was gone?" I asked, the things we can say in front of the camera I silently thought to myself.

"Well, Theresa thought I wanted to have a baby." Nessie laughed. "So she gave me this doll that I had to feed and change and everything." What had made her think that Nessie wanted a baby? I would have to find out later.

"But then Bella" She shot her mother an evil glare. "She threw it and broke it into a million pieces."

"Why?" I asked. "Well in the abstinence meeting thingy Theresa made us do, she thought Bella wanted kids so she took Kadidu from me and gave it to her." I nodded trying not to break out in laughter. My 'kids' in abstinence class? I couldn't wait for these camera's to leave.

"Okay, Anything else?" I asked probably not wanting to know.

"The bitch took my car." Rose snapped

"Rosalie, don't use that kind of language." As much as I hated Theresa it didn't seem right for her to call her a bitch on TV.

"She took my Jeep." Emmett cried. "And she made Rose and I ride the bus."

"But we got kicked off for PDA?"

"PDA?" I asked.

"Public Display of Affection." Rose laughed. "God mom, you don't have to act so old."

Why am I not surprised. Wait, my daughter in her ninety's just called me old.

I was scared to ask anything else. Thankfully it was around what humans would consider super time so I used the excuse that we were all tired and hungry and asked if anything else was needed of us right now.

The cameraman assured me they had enough footage and set up a time for them to return for a day in two weeks.

We watched as the camera crew drove away.

I turned back to face my family, "Now what really happened?"


	39. What Really Happened?

**A/N: Yay, Next Chapter's up!**

**Thanks for all the great reviews, I am trying to add in as many of the suggestions as possible. **

**I got sort of distracted starting another story...I was watching wife swap and laughing about the stupid things people think they need in their homes and started wondering what would happen if Emmett bought a tanning bed. It was supposed to be a one shot but now I am working on the second chapter. **

**And again I still don't own anything. :( *Tear***

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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EsPOV

"Well, Theresa found Emmett with a corset and women's underwear, thought he was gay until he came clean about him and Rose. They went to marriage counseling because Emmett was impotent because of the feelings he was getting from Jasper so it got turned into some gay incest thing." Wait impotent? Is that possible? I didn't have time to think Alice was quickly onto the next subject.

"We took Theresa shopping and she realized we spend too much money so she took away all of our favorite things, Edwards music, Em and Jazz's games, Rose, Bella, Nessie and my clothes, Rose's car, Emmett's jeep. Which by the way Carlisle we already went and got all of our boxes out of the storage unit." I glanced up at Carlisle as he nodded I was about to ask but Alice continued.

"She made us sit down and have an abstinence talk where she determined Bella would be an unfit parent and made her carry around the stupid doll. Nessie was upset about loosing the doll and I don't even want to know what was going on in Edwards mind. Jasper's about ready to go crazy because of Nessie's hormones making Jacob who changed to Scruffy uncomfortable."

"She didn't think it was appropriate that I spent time with Ness, so I changed and spent the first week as Scruffy the stray." Jake laughed. "But I got even, hopefully they will show her being attacked by Scruffy on the show." I laughed at that thought, it was defiantly something I wanted to see. Alice glared at Jake and I upset she had been interrupted.

"Then she made me and Bella be cheerleaders. I totally loved it, Bella didn't enjoy it and Edward hated the looks the other guys gave her. Jazz and Edward played football, they obviously helped the team win. After that Emmett dressed up as a panther and attacked Edward, then the next day Jasper attacked Theresa. Once we got home Theresa decided to open up to Carlisle and ended up hitting on him." Alice said so quickly even I had a hard time processing everything.

I was outraged, that woman had made a pass at my husband. I already had my plans for Tim, did I need to include Theresa? My thoughts were quickly interrupted by Edward.

"But Carlisle made a move on an elk while you were gone." Edward informed me as he laughed uncontrollably. My jaw dropped as I tried to figure out what they were talking about.

"An elk?" Emmett laughed.

"Inside joke." Carlisle laughed. I reminded myself to ask him about it later.

"But she hit on you?" I asked not really paying attention to his answer my thoughts were focused on what I would do to Theresa. "Why didn't you say anything before?"

"I didn't see the need to give Tim another reason to beat her." Carlisle replied. "Besides, it meant nothing to me."

I couldn't help but be enraged. I had spent almost a week in my hotel room plotting what I would do to Tim, how I could help this family. Would I now have to include Theresa.

"Esme!" Alice exclaimed.

"Mom, I don't think that's a good idea." Edward insisted.

"And what idea would that be?" my sweet Carlisle asked. I had a feeling he already knew what I was thinking. There was no way he would go along with my plan. My sweet compassionate understanding husband would never go along with me harming them.

"She's planning on killing them." Alice ratted me out.

Carlisle looked disappointed. "Esme," He said pulling him closer to him. "That isn't our way love."

"No, I think he has it coming to him." Rose agreed.

"Well so does Theresa." Bella interjected. "Maybe even more than Tim. She made a move on both Edward and Carlisle."

"On Edward?" I asked even more confused.

"That makes her a pedophile, that's as bad as being an abusive alcoholic."  
"Well technically Edward could be her grandfather." Jasper laughed.

"Oh my God, I just realized something." Emmett exclaimed laughing. "Edward you're even worse than Theresa, I mean there is like a ninety year age difference between you and Bella. Does that make you a pedophile too?"  
Where the hell was this conversation going? I put my head down in my hands as I listened to my kids bicker.

"Shut up Emmett" Edward snapped.

"Besides I'm eighteen now." Bella reasoned with Emmett.

"So technically you wouldn't you sleeping with Edward be statutory rape? Considering he's only seventeen?"

"No that would be Jake." Rose laughed" A four year old and a nineteen year old?"

"I haven't-" Jake started to defend himself.

"Enough!" Carlisle commanded. I was slightly taken aback by his tone of voice. These past two weeks had put a strain on him.

"Sorry Carlisle," Emmett apologized desperately trying to hold back his laughter. " You know you're the worst anyway. There is like three hundred years between you and Esme."

"Okay, my whole family has issues, can we drop this subject?" Nessie asked I could tell she felt uncomfortable.

"Trust me Ness, your family could be a lot worse." I assured her, reminding myself how thankful I was to have been given this second chance at life.

Theresa POV

I had a hard time sitting in the limo on the drive home, the forty-five minute trip seemed to take forever. Tim was being unusually quiet; that probably meant a lot of yelling when the camera's left. I could take it, right now I just wanted to see my kids.

We pulled up to the house; I smiled as I saw my kids on the porch holding up a sign saying 'Welcome Home Mom!'.

I ran up to them excitedly pulling them into my arms. Tim came to my side and began explaining to me some of the things that happened while I was gone. Of course leaving out the parts that made him look bad. Those things would come later, once the camera's were gone. I wonder if he had taken into account how many people we know that would be seeing this. How would they feel when they found out the new mom had to go stay at a hotel because of him.

The camera's didn't stay long and left promising to return in two weeks. If there was any thought of me leaving Tim it would happen now. In two weeks time I would have fallen back into his trap completely. I decided to wait until the kids went to bed and see where things went.  
After the kids went to bed I sat on the couch and decided to read a book letting Tim approach me.

"I'm glad your back." He said as he walked into the living room. "Esme was a freaking psychotic bitch."

"Why do you say that?" I asked wondering why he had hit on her if she was so psychotic.

"She broke into our house, after she was staying in the hotel, she came into my bedroom and threatened my life." He explained sounding like he actually believed it himself.

"What?" I couldn't believe this. "Why wasn't anything said about this before?"

"The production crew claimed Esme never left the hotel room, claimed that I was hallucinating." Tim said more angrily.

"Maybe you were." I suggested increasing his anger.

He reached for the lamp on the end table next to where he was standing quickly throwing it I cringed as it hit the wall behind me.

I sat there motionless, too scared to move I watched him. He stood there over me closing his eyes he took a few slow deep breaths.

"Hey, I'm sorry?" He apologized sitting on the couch next to me.

"Sorry for what?" I didn't want to upset him but I wanted to his explanation of what happened.

"For everything. For the way I've treated you, for my drinking, just for everything I have put you through. Esme made me realize that it's not right to treat you like that."

I didn't know what to say. I sat there looking at him tears forming in my eyes. Tim

moved closer to me, placing my face in his hands he leaned in and kissed me.

I could smell the alcohol on his breath.  
"What happened to the I'm sorry for the drinking?" I asked pulling back from him.

"You don't expect me to quit in one day do you?" he asked. "I've been trying but it was hard, I didn't have my reason to quit until you came back." He grabbed my hand and pulled me up leading me up to our bedroom. I sighed and decided to wait and see if he could change this time as we went up to bed.

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**Okay, Thanks again for reading, now go check out Emmett's bright idea...Let me know what you think, should I continue the story.**

**Next up for Wife Swap we will find out what happens when the camera's return two weeks later! Also Yes, I realize that Esme didn't get the full story, I am breaking up the explanation into other chapters as well, along with an explanation while they watch themselves on TV. **

**Thanks again for all the support for this story!**


	40. Two weeks later

**A/N: Sorry for the delay on getting this chapter out. Document Manager had been down since yesterday when i originally tried posting. Therefore i also have a new chapter for Sadistic Bella and Emmett's bright idea up. *Hint Hint* Let me know what you think.**

**Thanks's to everyone for the great reviews. I'm taking everyone's suggestions and trying to incorporate them into the story. **

**And sadly as always I don't own anything. :(**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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EsPOV

Tomorrow the camera crews would be back. I couldn't get over how good it felt to be myself again; how good it felt to be home. I pulled my new Jaguar XFR into the parking space and headed into the grocery store. I stopped and looked back at the car and shook my head. I knew Carlisle loved me; he didn't need to buy me a fifty thousand dollar car. I laughed realizing it was probably for him as much as for me; any excuse to buy a new car I shrugged as I turned and walked through the parking lot.

I headed into the grocery store and went over some of the things I told Nessie and Jake I would pick up. First stop the produce department; although it didn't appear that either of them had to adhere to normal human diets I tried to make them eat healthy. Next up Jake's favorite section; meats. Working my way around the mass of other customers I pulled a tab from the machine and glanced at my number; 64. Looking up I realized that they were only on number 56. I glanced at the meat case deciding what to buy as I recalled recipes I had been wanting to try.

"Excuse me, are you Esme Cullen?" I heard an unfamiliar male voice approach behind me.

What did my kids do now? I quickly debated how to answer before turning around.

"Yes," I said hoping it was the right answer.

"I know we haven't met but I saw your picture on your husbands desk and thought I recognized you." he explained. "I'm Dr. Eric Young. I work with your husband Carlisle."

This was the psychiatrist that Emmett and Rose went to wasn't it? Why was he in Carlisle's office? "It's nice to meet you." I smiled quickly turning my attention to the counter to see what number they were up to; only 58.

"How's Emmett and Rosalie?"

"They're fine." I answered hoping I didn't sound rude, I just didn't want to get further into this.

"I'm rather surprised they didn't set up another appointment. I think it would be beneficial to their marriage."

"I'm sorry," I apologized. "We were actually doing an episode of Wife Swap, to he honest I didn't even know they were married until I came home." I laughed uneasily. "We are trying to work things out within the family." I explained hoping it would end the conversation.

"Wife Swap?" He sounded shocked. "They didn't specify why the camera's were there, I was under the impression that it was one of those teenage marriage shows." He paused for a moment. "Some psychologists suggest that by going on those shows a couple would be trying to fix something in their marriage. Is that what made you and Carlisle go on the show?"

"It was actually our children's idea, and we decided to go along with it hoping they would learn something." I explained truthfully.

"Oh" He looked disappointed. Did he really think Carlisle and I had a problem.

"It was just something Emmett said." Dr. Young said shuffling his feet as he looked at them. "Maybe I was mistaken. I'm sorry."

I should have let it go but I couldn't; what was he referring to? "I'm sorry, Emmett said something that made you believe there was a problem in our marriage?"

"It's okay you know, with the way things are changing more and more men are coming out of the closet leaving their families. Just so you know it's nothing you did wrong he's probably had these feelings his whole life." He continued rambling on.

My jaw dropped, this man thought my husband was gay? Damn, moments like this made me wish my children weren't already dead so I could kill them. I glanced around and noticed a few other customers in line pretend not to look in my direction.

"I'm sorry was I out of line?" He asked taking note of silence.

"No, no" I paused trying to think of a way out of this conversation. "I can assure you my husband is not gay." I smiled thinking of how I never fully understood the quote absence makes the heart grow stronger until I had been away from Carlisle for two weeks. The things he did to me when I got home. There was no way a gay man would know how to do those things to a woman.

"I'm so sorry," Dr. Young looked completely embarrassed. "I didn't mean to start anything, I just thought…I don't know."

"Number sixty one." I heard the butcher call. As much as I wanted to get away from this conversation I was curious.

"May I ask why you think my husband is gay?"

He looked like he was having some sort of internal struggle; deciding what to tell me. What I wouldn't do to have Edward with me now. I was about to give up on getting an answer out of him when he finally decided to explain.

"Well usually I have a pretty good sense of…well usually I don't…if I find someone I…" I stood there waiting as he tried to explain. "Usually my gaydar is right on."

I almost laughed. I knew Carlisle drove the nurses and fellow female doctors crazy but I had no clue he was such a hot item in the gay community. I didn't say anything as I let him finish.

"He introduced himself when I started working at the hospital and I immediately got the impression he was gay. It wasn't until Emmett and Rose came in for counseling that I realized he was married with kids. Then when I started thinking about it, all of your kids are adopted, I linked Emmett's intimacy issues to something that could possibly come from Carlisle when he started talking about Jasper and feelings. I was convinced he, Emmett wasn't gay and then Emmett made a comment about Carlisle not screwing him up, so I thought he meant that just because he was gay didn't mean his son was…I don't know. Did any of that make any sense to you?""Not really." I smiled "But I can assure you that Carlisle and I are very happy. We may encourage Rosalie and Emmett to come to another session though." I said thinking that it might be fun to torture them a little more.

"Number 64?"

I glanced down at my ticket. "That's me." I said as I stepped up to the butcher's counter.

I left a few minutes later with enough meat to feed a small army or one growing shape shifter wolf and a vampire/human half-breed. I continued my pursuit down the aisles, no matter how often I went grocery shopping I couldn't get over the new foods that kept popping up on the shelves. I picked up a box of fruit loops cereal straws, one of Nessie's current favorite snacks, glancing down at the box I tried to see what she enjoyed about these. I stocked up on multiple packs of Swiss cake rolls, pop tarts, and chips, all stuff that I was sure I had never tried and had no desire to try. I picked up some eggs and was caught off guard by a conversation between two women in the corner by the milk.

I listened in as they discussed what they had overheard at the meat counter. Word was spreading quickly that Carlisle was gay. I quickly made my way to the checkout ready to kill Emmett.

Theresa POV

"Are you sure you can't tell?" I asked Nick glancing into the mirror. Tim had given me a black eye two days ago, although it was fading it took quite a bit of makeup to not be noticed on camera.

"No, makeup did a pretty good job." He assured me, I could tell he wanted to say more.

"What?" I asked wondering what he was thinking.

"I know it's not my place to say, but well I spent a lot of time around Tim while I was here; have you ever thought about leaving him?" He asked.

"He really does love me." I defended Tim because deep down I knew he really did love me and the kids.

I heard them mention something about filming and continued the conversation. "You know he wasn't this bad before the wife swap. I think it was something that Esme Cullen did to him."

I continued making lunch noticing the camera following me around. I sighed and began explaining a few of the things we had changed since the swap. Tim had agreed to allow the children to keep the television and the game system granted we supervised what they watched. The biggest surprise came when he moved the computer to the living room and began allowing Kristi and Sean to use it without my constant monitoring. I would like to think he did this to give me and the children more independence but even the kids knew he was doing this to keep them quiet about the things going on at home.

I didn't mention the issue of Tim's drinking. I was asked about Tim's behavior and took it to mean the fact that he had tried to hit as well as hit on Esme. I simply explained that I felt she had provoked this behavior.

Tim came home for lunch and we went back to our loving family routine. I kissed him as he walked out the door and left to start picking up the kids from school. After school I took the kids to all of their activities, although we were flexible with the TV and computer I couldn't see them sitting around doing nothing. I saw what that did to the Cullen's and I didn't want my kids getting married, or pregnant plus looking back I think Jasper may have been taking some drugs. Something about all of those mood swings made me suspicious.

I was relieved once the camera's were gone; this was really over. We would watch ourselves on television in a few weeks and then I would never have to think about the Cullen's ever again.

EPOV

The next day:

"Daddy is this really necessary?" Nessie asked as I covered her with a blanket.

"Sorry sweetheart but you look like you've aged six months in the past two weeks." I sighed. Even knowing she wasn't sick it almost broke my heart to see her pretend to be sick. Using it as an excuse to keep her in bed.

"Momma." Ness whined turning to Bella.

"Sorry sweetie, Grandpa agrees."

"Well where's grandpa, can't he just tell him that disease thingy he said I had flared up and I had a growth spurt?"

"I don't think we need to be bothering him with anything else right now Renesmee." I had to hold back a laugh.

Esme had confronted Emmett yesterday and explained to him what Dr. Young had told her. Wrong move, now Emmett was fixated on harassing Carlisle about being gay. I have been listening to his thoughts for the past ninety years and the past month has been the first time he has actually had to remind himself to remain calm.

"Is he still mad at Uncle Emmett?"

"He's not mad, he just doesn't want anything to be said that is going to make us look bad or expose us." I assured her.

"They'll be here in fifteen minutes." Alice called up the stairs.

"Hopefully we can all act normal and get them in and out of here in a few hours." Bella assured Ness.

I kissed Renesmee's forehead and sighed just hoping to get this day over with.


	41. The Cullen house two weeks later

**A/N: **

**Sorry it has taken me so long to update. I have had a mix of a busy schedule and writers block. I'm actually feeling a lot like Theresa lately between my son's vacation bible school, Karate, and Swim Lessons. Not to mention the fact that I'm a married woman who would probably still hit on Edward. lol **

**This chapter is basically a filler. I couldn't see the 'kids' misbehaving with Esme in the house after everything she's been through.**

**Thanks again for all of the great reviews. It really motivates me **

***Hint*Hint* Reviews = Motivation**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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EPOV

"Come on!" Alice burst into Nessie's room dressed in her cheerleading uniform.

"Aunt Alice, What are you doing?" Nessie laughed.

"Showing them how much I still love cheerleading." She smiled. "I still wish you would give it another try Bella."

Bella groaned and I chuckled and glanced over to Bella.

She released her shield and showed me images of just how she planned on using that uniform to torture me.

"It's okay Alice we will still put that uniform to use." "Daddy!" Nessie exclaimed.

The doorbell rang. "Don't worry Ness, I'll get them out of here, come on, lets get downstairs." Alice quickly grabbed both of us. Jasper met us at the top of the stairs and placed his hand in Alice's as we walked downstairs.

"Nick!" I heard Esme answering the door as we made our way downstairs.

"Hello Esme, Carlisle. It's good to see you."

"You too." Esme sounded happy to see him. We really owed him for being there for her during this whole ordeal.

The four of us walked over to the front entrance to find Carlisle and Esme talking to Nick. Emmett and Rose entered a few moments later.

"I want to introduce you to my kids." Esme said proudly. I may be older than her but still considered her my mother.

They introduced us and so far we were still all on our best behavior. I listened closely to my siblings thoughts not wanting anything to happen to make Esme and Carlisle look like bad parents. Lord knows there was going to be enough of that when the show aired.

_Wow, minus the crazy big house these people seem completely normal, the average American family._

I grinned at Nick's thoughts. Sure, minus the whole being dead thing.

"Have you heard anything from Theresa?" Carlisle asked.

Rose scoffed at the question, even Esme rolled her eyes at the question; but Carlisle was genuinely concerned for Theresa.

"Actually we did filming there yesterday. I don't usually get this involved but with all the time I spent with Esme I wanted to check in on both of you." Nick explained.

"How is she?" Carlisle asked.

"Well, They are back to their old ways. Not like Esme had a chance to do much there anyway. She claims he isn't as strict on the kids anymore but I think it's a way of bribing them." He paused for a moment. "It may have been unprofessional but I encouraged her to leave him.""It's what's best for the kids." Esme agreed.

"Well, are we ready to start filming?" I asked hoping to get this over with.

The camera's started rolling as Esme walked around the house explaining the way things had changed. Essentially nothing had changed but she gave a good story. Explaining how her and Carlisle were now more active in our lives including family meetings and sit down dinners as the camera filmed her and Carlisle in the kitchen cooking us our vegetarian dinner while the rest of us set the table and talked amongst ourselves.

"We still refuse to give up our vegetarian lifestyle. I mean how would you like it if something came up to you and tried to eat you." Carlisle smiled at the camera.

_Bella probably wouldn't have minded. _I chuckled at Jasper's thought as I glanced over at my wife.

"Edward, Will you go run a plate up to Renesmee?" Esme asked.

"Nessie's come down with a bit of a cold, nothing serious but she's been a little worn out right now." Carlisle added.

I took the plate from her as Bella joined me. To my dismay the camera's were right behind us. I could hear her talking to Jake a.k.a. Scruffy. We stopped at her door and I knocked.

"Nessie, I brought you a plate. Do you mind if we come in?" I paused for a moment to give her time to get back into bed.

"Come on in." she said in a weak voice.

I opened the door and smiled as I watched Nessie weakly try and sit herself up in the bed. She was about as good as actress as her mother. I placed the food on her bedside table.

"How are you feeling?" Bella asked.

"Tired." Nessie replied slumping back into her pillow.

"Try and eat something." Bella smiled. "I'm sure dad will be back up to check on you after dinner."

I looked over at Jake, I had a feeling that we weren't getting rid of the camera's by saying we were eating dinner this time, may as well make the mutt useful. "I'll let Scruffy out for a while." I suggested.

Jake let out a low growl not wanting to leave the room.

"Come on Scruff, Maybe you can get lucky and some scraps will fall on the floor." I smiled hoping he would get the idea.

He growled again. _Damn Vegetarian's do you think I always want to get stuck eating your tofu?_

I laughed patting his head. "Don't you want to earn your keep?" I hissed low enough the camera wouldn't hear.

Bella and I walked out of the room Scruffy grudgingly following behind us.

Alice smiled as we walked back into the kitchen. _Good idea Edward, get the mutt to do our dirty work, hope he likes garden burgers. _

Dinner went by well thanks to Jake. We all let out a big sigh of relief when they announced that they were done with the filming. Esme and Carlisle walked Nick and the camera crew to the door as the rest of us stood there listening to the conversation waiting for them to leave. Before walking away Nick paused for a moment thinking about how lucky Esme was and how sad it was she didn't have a chance to make a difference with Tim while Tim was still abusing Theresa and possibly the kids.

I let out a low growl and decided that no matter how much we disliked Theresa I couldn't sit back and watch her children be abused. I knew Carlisle would never allow us to do anything to him and I didn't want to disappoint him but something needed to be done.

Alice nodded her head in agreement with my idea.

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**Sorry this is another authors note: I'm having a hard time deciding what to do with Theresa. I think most of you can agree that something needs to be done about Tim but what about Theresa. There's still a lot to come. They get to watch themselves on TV, find out what other people think of them being on wife swap, and then then what finally happens to the Barrett's. Thanks again for all the love!**


	42. Look, We're on TV!

**A/N:**

**I just wanted to clarify something before I get any more questions on this. This is a fan fiction and as much as I try to keep things close to reality (Well as close as you can with vampires and wolves) Some people like Renee, Charlie, Billy and the rest of the pack will have a reaction to them being on the show. For my story to work we just have to pretend that nobody else they knew in Forks will see this. ****Yes, Not realistic but bear with me. Vampires aren't real either. **

**And again, I still own nothing.**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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EsPOV

"Hurry up!" Emmett called from the living room.

I felt Carlisle lightly stroked my cheek as I lay stretched out over him on our swing on the front porch my head resting in his lap. "Let's go see how crazy they make us look." he smiled.

"It shouldn't have been too hard." I laughed sitting up and taking his hand as we walked into the living room.

The rest of the kids had already settled in as Carlisle led me to our usual chair.

"Jake, hurry up!" Nessie yelled.

Jake quickly appeared with a large bowl of popcorn and sat it down on the floor between him and Nessie. I sighed and Jake glanced back at me. "I'm sorry, we made some last week, I'll protect it with my life." He assured me.  
"I'm holding you to that." I smiled. Years ago when Nessie was little the rest of my children well mainly Emmett, found out that popcorn made movie time more interesting. In other words my living room became covered in popcorn crumbs; popcorn has since been banned.

"Are we ready?" Alice asked giddily.

"As much as we ever will be." Carlisle sighed.

Emmett hit the play button and we watched as the opening scenes came onto the screen we watched as they introduced Theresa and her family.

"Each week from across America two different families are chosen. This week the super actively involved Barrett's from Florida. Mom Theresa devotes all of her time to her children carpooling from one activity to another in order to ensure they do not get involved in drugs. Dad Tim works forty hours a week but strong family beliefs means he is home every evening to sit down to family dinner. Daughter Kristi, seventeen, is the High School cheerleading captain. Son Sean age fourteen has already made it onto the varsity football team while daughter Jenny takes ballet, performing in multiple recitals. Noah takes karate three times a week, and all of the children spend their spare time doing community service and volunteer work at various places in the community."

Emmett paused the TV. "The perfect family. Can't wait to see how crazy the other family is." he laughed.

"Push play!" Alice yelled quickly grabbing a piece of popcorn out of Jake's bowl and throwing it at him.

"Alice" I scolded her.

"Yeah, Some of us do like to eat this." Jake snapped.

"Emmett, just push play." Carlisle sighed.

"She is about to switch lives with a new family on the other side of the country. The Cullen's from Montana live life to the fullest not worrying about money or how much of it they spend. Mom Esme is a stay at home mom home schooling her youngest adopted child while her other six adopted children attend high school. Dad Carlisle is a doctor at the local hospital leaving before the children wake and coming home after dinner. Emmett and Rosalie the eldest show little respect and have recently come out that they are in a romantic relationship."

"Recent?" Emmett and Rose both laughed.

" Middle son Edward spends most of his time with his piano and his sister Bella who suffers from depression and mental illness."

Bella lunged out of Edwards lap and grabbed the remote. "Mental Illness?" She shrieked as she paused the TV.

"Well, you did sort of have a death wish." Jake mumbled playfully throwing a handful of popcorn at Bella.

This wasn't looking good. I didn't want popcorn all over my house but I didn't need a fight erupting either, I glanced over to Edward.

"I think they are right love, but I wouldn't have you if you weren't you." He explained taking Bella's hand and pulling her back onto his lap. I smiled as he stroked her back as she rested her face on his chest.

"Can we please turn this back on? I want to hear what they have to say about me." Alice begged as we turned our attention back to the TV.

"Jasper while quiet struggles with severe anger with difficulty controlling it. Him and his sister Alice have started a romantic relationship."

"They could have used the word adopted." Carlisle said no doubt thinking of how this was going to look for him the next day at work.

Well, they actually got Jasper pretty close. Granted I don't think we can control our thirst like we could control anger and it makes him sound like a disturbed kid.

"I think your doing just fine baby." Alice whispered softly, I couldn't help but smile as I looked at the two of them.

"Alice is a terrible shopaholic who pays no regard to her spending. Driving a Porsche she says she can't live without buying something everyday."

"Well, that's not too far from the truth either." Alice giggled. "The only thing that's not true is that I can't LIVE without shopping."

Jazz simply laughed and we all shook our heads.

"Can we please get on at this rate it is going to take us all night to get through this." I asked anxious to see exactly what happened while I was gone.

"Youngest Renesmee is home schooled. Esme believes in letting her decide what she is learning letting her spend most of her time on the computer. Taking time out of school work to visit with her best friend Jake who happens to be almost twice her age."

"More like three times my age." Nessie laughed.

"Each mom is prepared to leave their lives for a new husband, new children and a new life."  
We watched random clips from our experiences meant to capture the audience's attention. Tim arguing with me over religion, Emmett yelling at Theresa that he was married, Kristi complaining of her lack of freedom, Theresa being chased around the yard by Jake, Tim yelling at me as he raised his hand to me, Theresa taking away Alice's clothes lecturing her about her spending. The scene's faded and cut to a commercial within seconds Bella's phone was ringing.

She answered it and I could hear Renee's voice screaming over the phone. "Bella! Why are you on Wife Swap?"

"Mom, calm down maybe you should ask Jasper or Emmett why we are on wife swap."

"What?"

"Well you didn't think Carlisle or Esme would do anything like this did you?" She asked.

The home phone rang and Alice jumped up to get it. I continued to listen to Bella explain to Renee how we had been put in this situation. Alice came back with the phone.

"Charlie's on the phone." She whispered handing it to Edward.

"Hello Charlie." Edward answered.

"Renee just called me and told me you're family was on wife swap."

"Mom, you told Charlie?" Bella asked.

"And Charlie just called Billy." Edward interrupted his conversation with Charlie to tell us. More for Jake's benefit since we could all hear both Renee and Charlie's reaction.

The commercial's finished and Emmett paused the TV again.

Charlie said he would call later after the show, meanwhile Bella tried to convince Renee to do the same, after a few unsuccessful attempts Nessie took the phone from her and promised to call back after the show was finished. Of course like the rest of us she couldn't say no to her only granddaughter.

"Everyone ready?" Emmett asked before hitting the play button.

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**Sorry for the cliffhanger. It's obvously going to take them a while to watch this, so I thought I would break it up into a few seperate chapters. **


	43. The Cullen's watch the episode

**A/N:**

**I had a hard time writing this chapter, everything seemed so redundant, so if it is, I'm sorry. **

**I'm sorry I didn't clarify this sooner. I have a hard time believing Bella would easily be able to give up contact with her family. Therefore Charlie and Renee both know parts of the story, they know Renesmee is their daughter and they don't age, therefor they pose as siblings. **

**And again, I still own nothing.**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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CPOV

I watched as the TV show Theresa exit the limo and enter our house. Her multiple comments on the size and cost of our house were probably correct. The average family shouldn't need such a big house, however we weren't your average family. With our hearing and Alice, Jasper, and Edwards gift space was a good thing.

I could understand her comments on our antiques, they are probably worth millions now but worth much less when we actually acquired them.

I watched as she walked through the bedrooms making smart comments about the number of children we had. I have met human families with more kids and technically we only had three more than her.

"We'll I think her problem with Jake started before she even met him." Edward glanced over at Nessie. We watched as Theresa had dropped a picture of Jake and Nessie and the camera zoomed in on the back where Nessie had written their names along with a little heart.

"It's just a crush daddy." Nessie defended herself.

"Just a crush?" Jake stammered his face saddening.

Emmett paused the TV watching intently to see where this was going.

"I wish it were just a crush." Edward said mumbling "damn imprinting mutt."

"Maybe imprints aren't always right?" Jake sighed.

"What are you talking about?" Nessie asked getting upset.

"Well what we have…" He paused. "I thought it was more than a crush."

"She's five!" Bella screamed.

"It's okay love." Edward soothed her. "He's not thinking about it that way. He's referring to the fact he considers her a soul mate."

I had to give Edward credit for staying so calm.

"Jake, I will always be your imprintee, your soul mate, my feelings are just starting to change." Nessie explained. "We'll talk about it later." She whispered quieter.

"You'll talk about it with the your mother and I as well." Edward said sternly.

I take it it wasn't Jake's thoughts that were bothering Edward now.

"Can we get back to the show?" Emmett pleaded.

"Please do." Nessie said hoping to change the subject.

I watched as we introduced ourselves to Theresa. Emmett ran up and gave Theresa a gigantic hug.

"Em, you look so freaking retarded there." Rose hissed. "Everyone in America is going to know I'm married to a freaking idiot."

"Don't forget the internet. I'm sure people in other countries will be seeing this too." Jasper added to Rose's upset.

"Besides we've all known what a retard you married for years." Edward laughed.

The scene changed and we watched Esme enter the Barrett house. I couldn't help but feel sad as I watched her smile as she looked into all of the kids rooms. The night before she left we had talked, I watched as her anger with Jasper and Emmett turned into desire to see what she may have had; had she lived. Edward had always been her baby. Although in a way older than her, his young age when he was changed as well as his solitude for so many years bonded them. While Esme would never say anything and she loved gaining Bella as a daughter she felt as though she lost part of Edward. Before she left she was actually really looking excited to taking care of 'real' children.

I watched Esme meet the new family, listened to Tim belittle her for being a young mother, degrade her for not being a good enough Christian. Through it all she smiled; politely defending her family.

"I'm proud of you." I whispered brushing my lips against her ear.

"Oh," Alice chirped. "They are going to show the best part!"

"Alice, I thought you promised me you wouldn't try to peek and see what they would be showing." Jasper sounded disappointed.

"I had to see how bad they made you look baby." Reaching behind her she wrapped her arms behind his head running his fingers through his hair.

Well at least Alice would have said something if there was something too bad. Or so I thought. I turned my attention back to the TV to see Emmett trying to cover himself with a blanket as Theresa held up a pair of Rose's underwear. "I like to wear it." Emmett confessed before cutting to another commercial.

"Emmett!" Rose shrieked.

Emmett actually looked confused. "I thought the camera was gone, I…I…"

"Enough just fast-forward."

The commercial ended and we were brought to a scene with Emmett explaining to Theresa how he and Rose had gotten married pouring on the fake tears about his intimacy issues. They showed Theresa yelling at me about the inappropriateness of Jake and Nessie's relationship, my sweet granddaughter calling Theresa a bitch. Well at least on camera it only came out as 'These aren't your rules Bleep', Theresa being attacked by Scruffy. The girls shopping trip showed the girls spending thousands of dollars without a care.

I couldn't help but cringe at the fact that Emmett was going to come out of this whole thing smelling like a rose.

"No pun intended there huh Carlisle." Edward laughed reading my thoughts.

"On the other side of the country the mom Esme is getting used to the Barrett's busy schedule." The narrator voiced. I watched clips of Esme chauffeuring the kids around, spending time at the homeless shelter, portraying that of what the perfect mother would do. Well at least Esme appeared to be normal.

"Wow, this is going to be bad." Edward sighed as a commercial for laundry detergent played on the TV.

"I'm sorry." Jasper mumbled. I smiled in his direction assuring him that I was no longer angry. I have a feeling they had learned their lesson and we wouldn't be doing any more TV shows.

"Don't be sorry baby." Alice smiled. "It all comes out okay."

"The mom's have lived with the new families rules for the first week, it is now time for them to give their new rules. Esme stood in front of Tim, Kristi, Sean, Jenny and Noah and explained the new rules. It broke my heart to see the kids so happy only to know that things would never change for them. It had taken me hours of reasoning with Esme to change her mind from going back and killing Tim; it just wasn't the right solution. Over the years I have learned to believe in Karma and I had a feeling the Universe would give Tim what he had coming to him.

EPOV

Karma huh, Maybe Carlisle was right. Maybe our plan for Tim wasn't the right choice. It had been years since any of us had actually killed another human, how would we really feel if we made the decision to take a life.

We continued watching only to find Alice was right. We were shown a clip of Esme and Tim fighting after the alarm had went off. It wasn't like she could tell him she was sneaking out the window to find some dinner. Bella cringed in my arms as we watched Tim raise his hand to Esme. Carlisle pulled her closer to him as he softly whispered 'I love you'.

Emmett, Rose, Jasper and Alice's thoughts were turned back to killing Tim. Thankfully the scene changed to Theresa explaining our new rules to us. This caused us all to break into laughter as she explained Alice would no longer be going shopping, and that she was taking us hunting.

Esme's rule change didn't go as well we listened as she explained that she was coming back from the hotel where she had been staying, how disappointed she was she didn't have the time to spend with the children that she was looking forward to, and how disgusted she was with Tim. They then showed Tim making a move on Esme. Carlisle's thoughts while watching this were some of the worst I had ever heard from him.

After fast forwarding through the next commercial break we came to Theresa taking everything away from us, they couldn't had made her look any more psychotic than she already did. If viewers didn't hate her yet they would as they watched her scream at an ten year old forcing her to give up her favorite possessions.

I watched Esme smile faintly as they showed Kristi on the computer and Sean playing video games and sang along to the sponge bob theme song with Jenny and Noah. We all burst into laughter as Esme sat in her hotel room explaining how ridiculous it was Tim thought she had come in through his window and threatened him.

It took us over an hour to get through the six minutes of Theresa's abstinence meeting. Esme finally understood what Carlisle meant when he said he made a move on that elk while she was gone. A low snarl escaped Bella's lips as she watched Theresa flirt with me.

I saw Bella in her cheerleading uniform and made a mental note to remind her how much I enjoyed seeing her in it. As much as Bella hated cheerleading I knew deep down she was glad she did it for Alice's benefit. For as many times as we went through high school Alice had never been able to fully participate, this allowed her to be a normal teenage girl for a week.

We had just gotten to the infamous hunting trip when Alice gasped. I saw what was running though Alice's mind. The image of Theresa lying on the floor in a pool of blood, Tim standing over her, the vision was still cloudy and I couldn't be sure if she were alive. Alice quickly left the room followed by Jasper.

"They'll watch the rest later." I explained hoping that no one would ask questions. I didn't want to say anything with Nessie in the room.

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**Sorry for the cliffhanger. I posted a poll on my profile as to what should happen to Tim. Still not sure what's going to happen to Theresa *her life is dangling at my fingers as we speak* **


	44. The Barrett's watch Wife Swap

**A/N:**

**First of all, after the way the last chapter ended you may have already figured this out but this chapter is more violent than most of my writing. There is also some strong language. Thanks for everyone who has reviewed and taken my poll. I'm rather suprised by the poll results. (As of last time I checked them) **

**Again, I still own nothing. :(**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

Tim POV

"Should I call and check in on the children again?" Theresa asked before sitting down on the couch.

"They're fine." I said trying not to yell at her. The episode of wife swap was going to be on shortly and I didn't want the children to see it, not yet at least. My brother had volunteered to watch them, this also meant that he would not be watching, another reason I was happy when he agreed.

I glanced over at Theresa wishing that she would come over a little closer to me. I really wanted to feel her close to me. Ever since she got back she all of a sudden had a problem with the way I handled things here. All these years and she never said anything; she goes and meets the perfect Dr. Cullen and now I'm not good enough for her.

We watched the opening credits as it introduced both of our families. So far our family was looking rather normal. Much better than the Cullens. We got to the part of Esme's visit as she got an attitude with me that night and I tried to hit her. The production crew made me look crazy, if I would have known how bad they would make me look I would have just hit her.

I honestly felt bad for Theresa having to live with those crazy people, I mean really who lets their kids marry each other, I don't care if they were adopted. First of all adoption just isn't natural, but to let two adopted siblings marry? I watched as Theresa preached to them about abstinence, not that it would do much good, especially because I was disappointed in her for not preaching God's word more during this prime opportunity.

Next thing I knew my wife was flirting with the younger son, with the scraggly bronze hair. Edward was his name I think, I was having a hard time keeping up with all of their kids. What the hell, he wasn't even eighteen, she was going to do this on national television where everyone we knew could watch?

"What the hell was that?" I screamed pointing at the TV.

"I didn't realize they caught that on tape. I'm so sorry." Theresa began crying. "I don't know what it was about him but I was just drawn to him. If you would have met him he seemed so much more mature, an old soul." Theresa continued to ramble on. I reached over grabbing her arms I pushed her back against the couch. "You were just drawn to him?" I screamed. "He's a fucking kid!" She lay under me staring at me. Something was wrong, why wasn't she crying. Had she actually learned to defend herself?Releasing her right arm I raised my hand, bringing it down across her cheek. Nothing, Not a single tear. The commercial had ended and I caught her looking at the TV again, maybe I should watch and see what else she did while she was gone.

They showed Esme's version of the new rules, thankfully she wasn't around to realize that I never enforced the new rules. No woman was going to come in and tell me how to raise my family.

I watched the blond one, Jasper, attack Theresa, it was more like he pounced on her. They didn't show much of the incident, cutting to Jasper in the front yard later that day apologizing claiming that he was upset over the death of an innocent animal. Theresa was right he did need anger management. It's a damn animal, they were put on the planet to eat. I could never understand the beliefs of vegetarians.

Next the camera's came into what I assumed was Carlisle's office. Theresa sat there telling him how horrible I was, putting all of our dirty laundry out there on national television. I was beginning to get angry again. I clenched my fist and bit down on my lip trying to fight the urge to smack my stupid wife for behaving that way. What I saw next pushed me over the edge, I couldn't fight the urge to kill her as I watched her jump into Carlisle's arms asking him to be with her.

Thankfully he was a gentleman and didn't accept her offer, I didn't want to have to fly across the country to kill him as well. Theresa's eyes quickly shifted to me and she looked into my eyes and knew what was coming. I reached out to grab her as she quickly ran away from the couch.

I jumped up and grabbed her shoving her against the wall the picture crashed to the floor next to us. "Just couldn't keep your hands off of that family, could you bitch?" I asked pushing her against the wall.

"It's no different than you and Esme." Theresa responded a tear trickling down her cheek as she tried to push me back.

I turned still grabbing her arms and pushed her the other way, this time slamming into the wooden china cabinet. Glass shattered everywhere as blood gushed out of the slash in her forehead; the carpet quickly becoming soaked in blood.

She was unconscious, this had to be by far the worst fight we had ever had. I stood there debating whether or not I should finish her off. My thoughts returned to my children, could I really kill their mother? Then I realized that if she did live she would defiantly call the cops this time. I sat down on the couch and watched her respirations slow.

The phone rang, I glanced at the clock and realized I had been sitting there in a daze for over an hour. I check Theresa, her chest still rose slowly and upon closer examination I realized she had opened her eyes.

"Theresa?" I asked checking to see if she was responsive.

I heard her mumble, good enough for me.

"Be quiet, don't try to do anything to let anyone know what's going on." I demanded as I answered the phone.

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**Damn, Sorry another cliffhanger, Who's on the phone this time?  
Thankfully I have a little more time to write now so the next chapter should be coming shortly.**


	45. The phone call

**A/N: **

**Once again thanks for all the positive reviews...Time to find out who's on the phone (although most of you got it right).**

**I sort of got distracted and wrote a quick oneshot inbetween chapters. It's a songfic by Heartland to the song I loved her first. Sort of inspired by fathers day, just got time to write it down. Also for those of you in love with the pups, there should be a new chapter up later today or tomorrow. This one's more action packed.**

**And, Once again, I still own nothing. :(**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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EPOV

Damn it, something's going on. I know that look between Alice and Edward, she see's something and the damn mind reader see's it, next thing you know they are taking off leaving the rest of us in the dark. What is it that they can't tell us? First Alice and Jasper take off, then Edward whispered to Bella that he needed to talk to them and takes off. It's got to be bad, it's not like him to leave Bella.

Rose continued to watch the TV, as if she was oblivious to what was going on. I shifted causing her to move slightly. Rose elbowed me and quietly pointed to Renesmee as she gave me her _shut up Emmett _look. Was it something to do with Nessie? No, they didn't want Nessie to know. That had to be it. How did Rose know? I guess she must have caught something different in the looks they were giving each other. Rose had a natural talent for reading into these things when it came to Ness; a mother's instinct I guess you could say. Granted she wasn't her mother it was closer than anything she ever thought she would have had before.

Although it didn't seem appropriate I wanted to laugh as I watched Jasper attack Theresa. I was relieved when Jake and Renesmee both burst out into laughter. I quickly joined them. Not being there when it happened, not seeing how upset Jasper initially was and the fact no one was hurt had made the situation easier for them to laugh about.

I wished Jasper was here for the next scene. I watched as Theresa poured her heart out to Carlisle before jumping into his lap asking him to leave Esme. I watched as Esme's fingers wrapped around the edge of the chair. Carlisle laughed as she ripped the stuffing out of the sofa.

"You can't seriously be jealous of her?" He laughed as he ran his finger across her jaw. "I love only you." He kissed her collar bone.

I began fast forwarding through the commercials, pausing as Bella's phone rang.

"Hello?" She answered. "Yes mom…I know…We've been pausing it…I think we're almost done…I'll call you soon…yes…I promise…" I glanced at the clock to realize it had taken us over two hours to watch so far. The commercials ended and we heard the ending theme song.

_Ooo and it's alright and it's comin' 'long  
We got to get right back to where we started from_

I sang along to the music watching Esme run into Carlisle's arm. She should have done it all slow motion, it would have looked great. Wait, I guess for her this was slow motion.

_Love is good, love can be strong  
We got to get right back to where we started from_

Tim's limo came pulling up later. He looked like an idiot, who could be scared of sweet Esme. Well I have seen her pretty mad, that time I knocked down an entire exterior wall in New York, yeah, I guess she could be scary.

I couldn't believe how Carlisle kept his cool sitting down with Tim. Well he did walk out at one point but I guess that's better than killing him. Well killing him on camera…with his teeth.

APOV

"Alice, what did you see?" Jasper asked as he ran behind me, right on my heels.

"In a minute." I hated leaving him in the dark but I needed to get far enough away from the house no one else would hear me. Realizing I was a good couple of miles away I slowed my pace.

Edward quickly tapped my shoulder; of course he had caught up with me. "Here." He handed me his cell phone. All I wanted to know was that the kids were alright, I was concerned because I hadn't seen them. Thanks to a perfect memory I quickly dialed Theresa's number. As I listened to it ring I heard Edward quickly explain my vision to Jasper. Jazz nodded his head taking everything in, we would be implementing our plan quicker than we had expected.

"Barrett residence." I heard Tim's voice on the other end.

"Yes Mr. Barrett, Is Kristi home?" I asked.

"Who is this?" Tim sounded frustrated and then it hit me, Kristi was very sheltered and probably didn't receive a lot of phone calls.

"I'm sorry to bother you sir." I said in my sweetest voice. "My name is Mary and Kristi and I have been working on a school project. I needed to ask her something, I'm having a bit of a problem with my part of it."

I let out a sigh of relief as I heard Tim's response. "She's at her Uncles."

"I'm sorry to bother you sir." I apologized. "I'm sure you are rather busy, blood stains are rather hard to remove from the carpets."

I clicked the phone shut before he could respond. I already saw him there in the middle of his living room too scared to move.

The three of us stood there debating what to do next. They had both heard Tim explain the kids were with their uncle, did we still need to intervene? Would things go right back to normal the minute we were out of the picture?

"They're coming." I said as I saw Bella, Emmett and Rose heading this way.

I was rather surprised Emmett hadn't said anything, I assumed it was because Rose kept him quiet. I'm sure the suspense was killing me.

They arrived and I explained to them everything that had happened. We developed our game plan. If everything stayed on track with what I was currently seeing this time next week Tim would be a thing of the past.

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**What? Another Cliffhanger? And we won't get back to this for a few more chapters, there is still a week left before they go on TV.  
**


	46. The pack and families reaction

**I still own nothing :(  
~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

JBPOV

The end credit's came on and before I could look back behind me Bella, Emmett and Rose were gone. Edward had already explained to me that they were planning on taking care of Tim but I had no idea they would do it this quickly. I exchanged glances with Carlisle and Esme.

"Do you know what's going on?" Carlisle asked.

I shrugged my shoulders. "I think Alice probably saw something." I stated the obvious.

"Maybe I should go see what's going on?" asked.

"Yep, then you can be just as much of an overprotective parent as Tim and Theresa." I laughed hoping the comparison to them would stop him; reminding him how old his children really were.

Esme laughed at him and I relaxed realizing he wasn't going to go check on them. I knew they didn't want Carlisle to know. They already knew how disappointed he would be in them, but they didn't want him to change their minds.

My phone jingled indicating a new text message. I flipped it open to realize there were several new text messages.

_Hey, Scruffy, Hope U forgot to get UR rabies shot before U attacked the bitch…_Seth

_Sit, Lie down, Shake, Good Boy, Can we say Whipped?…Embry_

_Scruffy? U let them name U Scruffy and U didn't kill the leaches?…_Leah

_A little word of advice, don't name my future niece a dog…_Rachel

_I've been thinking of getting a pet dog, are u house broken?…_Quill

My phone began ringing, I looked at the caller ID. Of Course Charlie would have had to have told Billy.

"Hi dad." I answered the phone.

"Hey Scruffy!" I heard him and Charlie both shout into the phone.

"Charlie called and told me he had a tape he wanted me to see." my dad explained. "He drove out and we just got done watching it."

I laughed nervously wondering what they planned to harass me about.

I was surprised when Charlie sounded rather serious. "Hey Jake,"

"Yeah," I responded nervously.

"I just wanted to let you know I still don't think I'm old enough to be a grandparent, don't make me a great grandpa before I'm fifty."

"Four more years?" I heard Nessie whine next to me, I don't think Charlie understood just how sensitive vampire ears were, Esme and Carlisle couldn't stop themselves from laughing.

"Did I hear Nessie? Tell her I said hi." My dad laughed.

"I'll put you guys on speaker phone." I said as I did it. "Carlisle and Esme are here as well."

"Hi." All four of them said almost in unison.

"Esme," Charlie said. "I'm sorry for everything you had to go through." "Oh," Esme laughed. "It was hard, but I still feel worse for Carlisle, having to deal with the family and that nasty human for two weeks. I was lucky enough to spend most of my time in the hotel."

I knew it was a lot harder than that for her, I had knew her past, overheard some of her and Carlisle's conversations, yet she continued to be strong.

"So Nessie, Billy tells me I have to ask you what Kadidu means." Charlie asked.

Nessie paused for a minute embarrassed and looking for me to answer for her. "You picked the name." whispered as I smiled at her.

"Umm, it's Quileute." She explained.

"I figured that much." Charlie laughed.

"Well let me just put it this way." I interrupted the conversation that was starting to become uncomfortable. "I won't be calling any of my children dog."

"Jake!" Nessie exclaimed. "Do you really think I would name my child Dog? It was a joke."

"Dog?" Charlie interrupted laughing.

"You know my dad…" Nessie started to say something. I turned to her and put my index finger over my lips. I could smell Bella approaching the house.

BPOV

"What's going on? I asked as we ran up to Edward, Alice, and Jasper. I had wanted to follow him when he left but decided if all six of us took off and left Renesmee would wonder what was going on. I didn't want her to know the horrible plans we had been making since we found out what Esme did to Tim. Edward quickly explained to us what had happened.

"You really should get back and distract her." Alice said. I knew I had to hurry. I wrapped my arms around Edward, "I'm fine with whatever you guys decide." I said quickly kissing him before running back to the house. I knew the plan was to destroy Tim, I just didn't know to what extent.

I ran into the house and heard Charlie's voice laughing, I entered the living room to find Renesmee and Jake on the phone with Charlie and Billy.

"Charlie taped the episode and ran it out to my dad." Jake explained.

"Hi dad, Billy." I said sitting down by the two of them. I watched Carlisle and Esme quietly slip out of the room. I began to panic hoping they wouldn't want to go check on the rest of the family. I let out a sigh of relief when I heard their bedroom door close.

"So Bells, I hope your mental illness isn't hereditary I'd hate to think it came from my side of the family." Charlie laughed.

"Well, I tried to warn you guys, but Bella obviously was suicidal long before you caught on." Billy added. I thought back to the first time he tried to warn me to stay away from the Cullen's, threatening to tell Charlie. Not that Charlie would have believed him, it still surprised me that my dad never caught on to what Edward was.

"Thanks Billy." I laughed.

"But if she hadn't I wouldn't have Nessie." Jake said quietly as he looked over at Renesmee. I was glad when Charlie spoke next. While Billy was agreeable with the situation and loved Nessie like a daughter he was still coming to terms his son was living with 'the cold ones'."So, Bells, What does Renee have to think of all this?" Charlie asked me.

"Well, she's called twice but we were still watching the show. I really should call her." I picked up my phone and began dialing her number as I walked away.

"Bye dad, bye Billy, love you. We'll talk to you later." I said as I stepped outside.

I hit call; Renee answered before it could finish ringing once.

"Bella, Why on earth would you do something like that?" Renee asked frantically. "They made you look like you were crazy." "Mom, calm down." I tried to sooth her. "It was Jasper and Emmett's idea."

"They made you look like a slut, Jacob? Jasper? And of course Edward." "They took it the wrong way. Besides in the end we came off looking like a normal family while the Barrett's look completely psycho."

"Well, that is true." She laughed. "It was rather amusing to watch you as a cheerleader…without falling. I would never have thought I would have seen that."

"Besides Theresa's the one who hit on MY husband!" I exclaimed remembering another reason why I thought she as well as Tim should die.

"That's true too. It's pretty bad when you hit on a seventeen year old." Renee sighed. "Even if he's eternally seventeen." She laughed.

I heard Edward and the rest of the family quickly approaching.

"Hey mom, I'm going to have to get going." I explained. "Mom?" Emmett asked? "Hi Renee!" His boisterous voice echoed off the trees. "What did you think of your little girl?"

"Is that Emmett?" Renee asked.

"Who else could be so loud?" I mumbled hoping Emmett didn't say anything I would later regret.

"Well tell him, and everyone else I said hi. I will give Esme a call tomorrow. It's terrible the way that she was treated." "Yeah, I gotta go, I'll talk to you later, Love you bye." I said so quickly it all probably sounded like one word to her human ears.

"So what did we decide?" I asked as Edward wrapped his arms around my waist.

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**I put a link on my profile to some pictures of the pups from Jacobs Pack. Along with the next story that is finally done. Thanks for reading and Reviewing!!**


	47. Wife Swap Message Board

**A/N: Sorry it took me so long to update, I had a hard time writing this chapter.  
To keep things from getting confusing the words that are italicized are words they are reading of the ABC website.**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~  
**

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EPOV

I opened my eyes and looked down at Bella resting her head on my chest, eyes closed, shield lifted allowing me free access into her mind. School today was horrid, one of the worst I have had, and I've been through high school many times.

I had grown accustomed to the vile thoughts every boy in every high school we had been to had about my Bella. It didn't bother me so much now as it had back when I first met her; remembering the first time I ever truly felt jealousy. My memories drifted back to Mike Newton, his lustful thoughts seemed tame compared to the things I heard today.

Word spread quickly that our family was on Wife Swap although I would have thought the cameras occasionally following us to school and ABC taping a football game would be a dead giveaway that something was going on. Once people started talking the rumors went flying. I heard everything from Bella and Jasper having an affair, that Bella had attempted suicide more times and in more ways than was ever implied on the show. That Bella's mental illness was a result of drug use, and that Carlisle had adopted us simply to have a houseful of young beautiful teens to keep for his pleasure. I was worried that DCF would intervene on the last rumor but Alice assured me that it was only a rumor and didn't see anyone taking it seriously.

I made it through the first two periods of the day within inches of actually killing someone. Jasper had been a help at first but he could barely handle the lustful intentions the guys were feeling when they saw Alice. The idea that she may be back on the market was making guys heads turn in her direction. Walking to third period trig I passed Neil Tyson he glanced over quickly at Bella, his mind quickly playing images of him with both Bella and Alice, quickly turning it into the entire family involved in an orgy. A low growl rumbled in my chest as I stared over at him; I didn't care if it looked conspicuous. Within seconds I felt Bella's shield go out around the hall. I began to protest in fear that someone may be thinking of something that would hurt our status here, but in the end I gave in following her into the classroom.

I ran my fingers through her hair, my hands slowly traveling along her back, her body pressing harder against mine as she reacted to my touch. Lifting her head she pushed her lips to mine. I wrapped my arms more tightly around her as I flipped her over to her back. Her fingers grasping my hair as she pulled me down closer to her.

"Hey! Come check this out!" I heard Emmett call enthusiastically from the living room.

We both paused for a minute; Bella watching me as she waited for me to figure out what Emmett was up to.

"He's reading the message board on ABC for Wife Swap." I explained to her smiling as I heard some of the things he was reading.

Bella laughed; "Shall we go see what America thinks of us?"

We grabbed our laptops and went downstairs to find the Emmett and Jasper on their computers. Bella and I both went to the website and started looking at the different topics.

_MEAT IS MURDER!_

"Did you see the meat is murder one?" Laughing I asked Jasper as I began reading.

'_Thank God for people like the Cullens! I love the episodes where one family is vegan, and another loves junk food, take out, meat and other nasty things. It is so obvious that vegans and vegetable lovers are so much healthier. They have better attitudes and they just look (physically) better. Did you check out how hot Dr. Cullen was? I'd  
__At the end of this episode, Theresa says she will shoot another buck and will probably continue eating as she always has, and that is advertisement enough to STOP EATING MEAT. She is fat and out of shape, just like all the other wives who order out and eat meat.  
__Thank you Cullens for educating the world, for trying to show the close-minded Barrett's a new way of thinking and for sticking to your vales. To the Barrett's, there is no way that you represent "America," Tim is a freaking abusive controlling asshole.  
__Just so you know I am not a member of PETA, and I am an everyday, educated person who knows that not all vegans are crazy as you would like to believe. While I don't agree with Jasper's approach I do commend him for sticking to his beliefs. Not once did I see him eat a living creature.  
__Hopefully Americans will see this and take something from the Cullen's. They may have their issues but they genuinely love each other and try to live right._

_~Dharma ~_

I could barely finish reading it because we were all laughing so much.

"Check out the responses." Bella said as she began to read.

'_I totally disagree with you on Jasper's approach. He tried to kick that stupid Bitch's ass! Making Vegetarians look badass! Go Jasper!"_

_~Buddy~_

'_While I am generally opposed to violence I have to say Theresa had it coming to her, if only someone would have threatened Tim._

_~Amelia~_

I went back to the main page and looked over other topics.

_EMMETT CULLEN TOTAL GOD_

"I wonder who wrote this one?" I asked as I read the topic.

'_OMG, Emmett Cullen is the hottest thing I have ever seen! I could sit and watch this episode 24/7. Total Hotness! That wife of his is one lucky woman. Of course I can see why she would marry him they are both gorgeous.'_

_~Bear lover~ _

"Emmett, that's pathetic." Bella laughed. "Look at this response, I wonder who it's from." Bella winked as she read the next comment. '_I have to agree that he is very fine, and while I'm not into women his wife is extremely beautiful, but is his wife lucky? Imagine being married to him. Not to mention they had to go to marriage counseling for impotence problems.'_

_~Lillian~_

"Rose!" Emmett screamed as Jasper, Bella, and I laughed at Rose's comment.

"There's more. From real people!" Bella added.

'_Maybe he is having impotency problems because he isn't really into women. Maybe he just needs a good man to get his motor running.'_

_~Huffy~_

'_I have to agree with Huffy, I can't see how any guy can have a problem getting busy with a girl so fine! Maybe the marriage was just some kind of gay cover up. He was talking about his brother._

_~Adam~_

Emmett sat there typing ferociously at the computer. I refreshed the page to see he had posted another comment.

'_I DEFINATLY do not think he is gay! He is married! Maybe it was like a Bromance thing going on between him and Jasper.'_

_~Bear lover~_

"A bromance? We have a bromance?" Jasper laughed. "Edward are you involved in this bromance?"

"No, no thank you." I ran my fingers through my hair shaking my head. "I'll let that be between you two."

"What's between who?" Nessie asked as her and Jake walked in the room.

"Hey maybe you could include Jake?" Bella asked Emmett.

"Include me in what?" Jake looked like he was ready to back out of the room as he quickly thought of possible excuses.

"Emmett thinks we have a bromance thing going on."

Jake laughed uncertain of what to say.

"We were just looking at the wife swap message boards." Bella explained changing the subject.

"Oh, do they say anything about me?" Nessie asked.

I flipped back to the topics and scanned down the list.

'

_Religion and Hierocracy  
__Rule Changes  
__Someone Help the Barretts  
__Do people actually change after being on the show  
__Home schooling: The reason why it doesn't work_

"I got one here." I said as Nessie came and sat next to me. Jake hovering over the two of us.

_This is the problim with people raising their kids today. They are laisy. They don't spend time to riaise their kids they just stick them in front of the computer. Kids today need a good edication. _

_~Max~_

"What the hell!" Nessie screamed as we read the comment. "She spelt half the words wrong. I'm seven and I can spell better!"

"Well you aren't the average person either Nessie." Jake laughed.

"What are they saying on the someone help the Barrett's? Nessie asked.

"Oh, I think they will be taken care of." Emmett replied an evil grin on his face. According to Alice's last vision things would take place three days from now. All of us had already started planning our excuses to get out of the house so Carlisle and Esme didn't suspect anything.

I shot him a glance warning him to back down. As much as I knew it was for the best I didn't want my little girl to know the monstrous things we were about to do.

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**I had all kinds of Ideas for the things they could read on the message board. I added the other topics they didn't read about as well, if anyone has any ideas for show comments. (What a person watching this on TV would think.) Let me know, If people actually like this I may think of adding another chapter, get some of the other characters involved.**

Again thanks for everyone who's been reading and Reviewing. Thanks to CellaCullen who I think was the only person to review every single chapter giving me a really good review high!


	48. More Message Boards

**A/N:  
****I got some reviews for more message board topics so I decided to do one more quick insert of topics.  
These past two chapters have been a bit more of a challenge because I'm having a hard time with the set up of it. ****  
Thanks to K.K. Fush form the idea of the last topic.**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~  
**

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CPOV

I pulled my car into the drive, thankful to be home from work. The hospital was buzzing with talk about the wife swap episode. Dr. Young had made it a point to come down to the emergency room six times today. But if the episode made me appear to be gay it didn't phase the female nurses. I had a few of the nurses actually offer to 'swap' places with Esme. I couldn't believe how blatantly obvious they were making it now.

I stepped in the front door surprised Esme was not here to greet me. I sighed as I walked to the bedroom, following her heavenly scent into her loving arms. To my surprise I opened the bedroom door to find Esme sitting there looking at the computer screen. She poked her head up and smiled at me as I walked over to her side. Standing she leaned in and kissed me before I sat down pulling her onto my lap.

"What are you looking at?" I asked as I glanced over at the screen.

"Message Boards for Wife Swap." She answered looking back at the screen. "Some of it's just horrible, while some of it is amusing." She paused. "Edward asked Jake take Ness out to a movie while I sent everyone else out to hunt. We couldn't take it anymore. It started out as simple fun but people can be so cruel." She commented on the message boards.

Oh good Lord. I glanced over at the topics, no wonder they were upset.

I took the mouse and clicked on the link to

_From Wife Swap to Girls gone Wild_

_I've never watched Wife Swap before but seeing the previews for what the girls on that episode looked like I just had to tune in. Theresa is just a ugly skank and jealous of how hot those girls are. Rosalie is by far the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. Bella just screams sweet girl next door, but we all know the sweet girls next door aren't so sweet *Wink*Wink* Then there's Alice I can just imagine her cute perky little body bouncing all over me. I can't disregard Renesmee either, although she is too young for my taste I can see her joining her sisters in a Girls Gone Wild tape in a few years. Even the mom was freaking hott! Luckily I tivo'd it Just watching those girls gets me excited. _

_~...Chick.~_

Wow, without saying anything I glanced over at Esme.

"Oh, just read the comments." She said scrolling down the website.

_I couldn't agree more I almost want my wife to do the show hoping I could get a mom that hott. Tim is a complete ass for treating such a beautiful woman like that. Sure Theresa I can see slapping her around a little but it would be a crime if he ever hurt that beautiful body._

~_RossBan_~

_OMG Men are such pigs these are teenage girls UNDERAGE teenage girls. I can't believe you would think of a ten year old like that! People like you belong in JAIL!_

_~Marie~_

_Marie- Just because you are probably some fat ugly bitch doesn't mean you need to say anything like that. I don't think any of us guys intend to go find these people we just want to pause the episode in the key moments, like Rosalie running down the stairs jumping on Emmett. (Pretending I am Emmett) J_

_~waiting for my blonde haired beauty~_

_Hey! Rosalie is 18. That's legal! As far as the others are concerned as long as no one finds out its okay. Just imagine how much better they will look in a few years when they are all of age!_

_~...Chick.~ _

_I don't know what all the fuss over Rosalie is about. Yes she's hot but Bella is the slut of the family. I'm sure she would do anything if asked. _

_~..crazy.~_

_All three of them are fucking gorgeous but did you check out Alice's ass? _

_~Toby~_

"I can see why the boys were upset." I said glancing at the other topics.

"The boys got just as big of a reaction. Ir's just the girls generally keep the comments a little cleaner and comment on how disguisted they are by Theresa hitting on you and Edward." Esme laughed. "Although Emmett did do a lot to hype himself up on some of the message boards."

I could only imagine. Shrugging off that thought I glanced at the other topics.

_Stupid Out Of Control Kids_

_Ugh, what is the Cullen's problem? Carlisle and Esme DO NOT KNOW HOW TO RAISE KIDS! All they do is go "shopping", sit in front of some kind of screen of some sort and have sex! I'm sure in a family of that size, Carlisle and Esme wouldn't be blind to those things. Seriously, what kind of parents do that?  
This is clearly why most of American adults these days are lazy, un-employed and over-sexed, from a lack of parenting! Esme, clearly, isn't mentally strong enough to take on the role of a stay-at-home mum. She lets them walk all over her. Don't get me started on Carlisle! He is barely there to help Esme with the kids. Alone, all day with six teenage bratty, whiney spoilt kids. (Suppose, thats her fault, she brought in on herself!) No wonder she can't be bothered to parent them properly!! And Renesmee. WHAT KIND OF PARENT LETS THEIR INNOCENT 10 YR OLD HANG OUT WITH A LATE TEENAGED BOY!! Ugh, Carlisle and Esme need parenting classes ASAP! For the kids welfare, its at stake!_

_~Clarissa Boweman~_

I looked over at Esme after reading the comment. It was extremely critical of her parenting abilities. While they may not be her kids, or well technically even kids, people would see this and I didn't want them thinking badly of her.

"I'm sorry, we should never have done this." I apologized as I ran my fingers through her hair as she rested her head on my chest. I scrolled down to see if there were any responses.

_How can you put so much blame on the Cullens at least they didn't hide who they really were. The Barrett's came off as the all-American family only for viewers to find that they were anything but. The man abuses his whole family and Theresa just sits back and lets him do it. They need the parenting class, as well as a phone call to child protective services.  
The Cullens never admitted to being perfect. They never lied about what they really were, never tried to pretend to be perfect and while they defiantly have their problems they stick together and love each other. _

~_JennieRose_~

_I am going to have to agree with JennieRose here. The Cullens really do try to be good people and they love each other. (Maybe a little too much) But they admit their flaws and don't hide behind some sort of charade._

~_Trishka_~

Esme and I were both laughing as we read the last comment. While we may have come across as having some issues it made us appear more human. This was a good thing, it could only be a matter of time before things got back to normal. I think we both had had enough of this right now. Standing up I swiftly pulled her to my arms and ran to the bed. Wisely taking advantage of an empty house.


	49. Time to go to Florida

**A/N:  
Thanks again to everyone for reading and Reviewing, I own nothing, it all belongs to Stephenie Meyer's and I just play in her world.**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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APOV

I looked over at Jasper as we drove home in my Porsche. Driving fast always makes me feel better. Earlier Edward decided Jake and Nessie should go out and see a movie and have some dinner so the rest of us could read the message boards he didn't want her to see. I mean really, you don't want her to read comments people make about how crazy the family is but you will send your daughter on a date with someone three times their age. At least I had already seen Jake being more scared than Renesmee when their relationship really began to form.

After they left all hell had broken loose at home since we didn't have to hold back our own comments any longer. I mean it's sick the things that grown men think about teenage girls. Not to say there weren't a lot of comments on the guys in the family either. Carlisle seemed to be a hit among the gay community and of course everyone was in love with Edward. Jasper tried to keep the jealousy down but he himself couldn't control his own emotions when these men were talking about my ass.

I swear, if I could track all of these guys down.

"What's wrong?" Jazz asked placing his hand over mine. "Your emotions, your feeling very perturbed."

"Just thinking." I paused. "About how horrible humans can be, the things they think and say."

"Well at least there will be one less scumbag in the world in two days." Jasper smiled.

He was talking about Tim of course. Since the end of the swap I have had several visions of her and the kids. I was continuously trying to tune into a vision of them to make sure they were all alright. After they had watched the episode I had the vision of Theresa laying there in puddle of blood. If it hadn't been for my phone call I am pretty sure that he would have killed her there. Right now he was still too scared to hurt her again, scared someone was watching. That would all change in two nights he would go out, get drunk and come home with enough drunken courage to kill her. I could probably let this happen if it weren't for the fact that all of the kids would be home. I had already seen the image of him slaughtering his whole family. I would not let that happen.

Jasper and I arrived home after the rest of the family. I listened as we walked in the door to see what everyone was up to. Carlisle and Esme were occupied in the bedroom, as were Emmett and Rosalie. Jake and Renesmee had returned home and were watching a movie with Edward and Bella.

Jasper took my hand and lead me upstairs to our bedroom. He shut the door and swiftly picked me up and placed me on the bed playing with the button on my jeans as he hovered over me. He was really moving fast, I guess everyone was still releasing all of our pent up frustrations since the swap.

Wrapping my fingers around his arms I pushed myself up and flipped myself over on top of him. He smiled laughing as I straddled him. Leaning down to kiss him at a slowly human speed I began to unbutton his shirt letting my fingers dance across his chest letting him know I was in no hurry tonight.

His hands ran up my sides pushing my shirt up. I slid my hands over his and put them back at his sides as he groaned in frustration.

"I'll be right back." I whispered into his ear. "Don't move an inch." I smiled as I skipped over to the closet knowing he didn't dare move, I had him wrapped around my little fingers.

I moved quickly through my closet knowing exactly were ever piece of clothing was, everything I had to reorganize when Theresa took all of our clothes away. I slipped out of my jeans and tank top and quickly replaced it with a pink lace corset with purple and yellow flowers and white leather ties running up the front. I reached down and began running the matching stockings up my legs. That's when it hit me, another vision.

I saw Tim coming home to Theresa and beating her again. He didn't hurt her too badly but it meant he was no longer as scared as he was the other night. I stood frozen as I watched the disturbing image of Tim throwing Theresa across the room, she slammed into the dresser, the clock on it was set with today's date, with the time difference it would be happening in less than an hour. He threw her onto the bed and raped her. When he was finished he passed out next to her.

"What did you see?" Jasper's comforting hands were wrapped around me.

I couldn't speak. I simply stared at him wishing I could cry for the horrible pain Theresa was experiencing, for the things I knew those children were able to hear.

After standing there frozen for a few moments I felt I was able to speak again. "He's getting worse again. I think we need to leave tonight. Go to Florida and keep an eye them, be a little closer incase I have another vision." I sighed as I began to put some clothes on.


	50. Tim's new date

**A/N  
Okay, as far as my current plans for the story are taking me only three chapters left :(  
I am also working on another story with Pseudostar432 She did the first seven chapters and we are working together to finish the story. Go check it out!  
Thanks again for all the great reviews Keep it up!!**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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TPOV

Damn, there are a lot of people in here tonight. I drove all the way out to this Podunk bar because it's usually empty. If I wanted to take some bitch to a hotel tonight I would have gone to Shea's. I wanted a quiet place to drink tonight; I need to think. Ever since we had been on wife swap things have progressively gotten worse.

Theresa had gotten the nerve to stand up to me, well, she lost it again, but that's beyond the point. She would eventually leave causing the perfect family I had built to crumble. It was bad enough a few of the other church parishioners had commented on seeing the episode. I assured them that I was in therapy, AA, anger management all that crap, so far they were buying it but it would only be a matter of time before they caught on.

I headed over to the left side of the bar and ordered a jack and coke from the bartender as I sat down. Obviously this bar was not accustomed to being so busy, it was taking the bartender forever to get a simple drink over to me. I could feel my fingers begin to twitch in anticipation of having a drink. I thought back to Kristi how much harder she was going to be to control once she turned eighteen. She would defiantly leave the house, Sean would be next. With Kristi gone he would rebel even more. My drink arrived and I took a sip. As much as I wanted to down it I realized it may be a while until I get another one around here. I had my plan, now I just needed the courage to go through with it. I glanced up at the clock, it was only ten thirty. I had plenty of time to build up the courage to go through with my plan.

I can't go on living like this. Putting up the false sheared of loving husband and father. In truth they all drive me mad. We can claim we waited so long to have kids because we were waiting until we were financially and emotionally ready but Theresa knows that's a lie. She knows I never wanted to have kids; Shit, I never really wanted to marry her but because of a damn pregnancy scare when we were dating I had jumped the gun and proposed thinking I was doing the right thing.

By tomorrow I would be sitting on the beach in Aruba. They were all just a burden that I no longer cared for. Tonight, I would go home and dispose of them by the time anyone found them I would be on a plane to freedom.

The bartender came by again and offered me another drink. I nodded in agreement as I reached into my pocket to lay some money on the table. I leaned against the bar as the jukebox played a George Strait song. I closed my eyes as I listened to George sing about beaches in Mexico. Soon I too would be on the beach sipping rum out of a coconut.

I felt something bump across my thigh, opening my eyes I was about to turn and cuss the guy out for bumping into me, that is until I saw what was sitting next to me.

"Excuse me." She said rather rudely as she turned her bar stool away from me.

"No, it's okay." I assured her in a desperate attempt to flirt with this beauty. She could bump into me all night. Looking her over I had never seen someone so beautiful. Her face was pure perfection beautiful eyes and large plump lips. Her long blond hair flowed down over her shoulders covering the back of the dress she was wearing. The dress was a small tight purple sun dress. Granted Florida never really got cold, it was still too cold for something like that this time of year. Obviously not from Florida, her skin was so pale.

"My name's Tim." I introduced myself.

She didn't turn back to me, maybe she didn't hear me.

I tapped her on the shoulder, she really should have more close on. Well, not really, but her skin was so cold.

She turned swiftly to face me, her eyes looked cold. "I heard you _Tim."_

I smiled deciding she was simply playing hard to get, then it hit me. Something about her looked familiar. Had I met her before, is that why she was speaking to me like this? How did I know her? Surely Kristi didn't have any friends this hot. She definitely wasn't from the church. How did I know her? I sat there looking confused.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be rude." She apologized not saying anything else.

I think I mumbled something along the lines of itsokay but I couldn't be sure I was still fascinated she was actually talking to me.

"Your not from around here?" I asked. She looked too young to be hanging around this bar, and I still couldn't place where I knew her from.

"N o." She said not giving any inclination to where she might be from.

"So," I smiled "Do you have a name?"

"Yes." She looked away as she spoke, damn I was loosing her attention.

The bartender came by to get her order. She ordered a sex on the beach, "They're my favorite." She whispered in a seductive voice.

This bitch was going to be mine by the end of the night.

"So, do you have a boyfriend?

"Yes, but he's not here." She said seductively.

I glanced over to the clock and realized I had time to go to the hotel down the street for an hour or so. It was time to make my move. "I know a little place we can go to." I suggested.

She smiled and nodded her head.

"By the way, I never did get a name." Not that the name mattered but it might be nice to know. Remember her as the last woman I slept with in America, I sure wasn't going to do anything with Theresa ever again.

"Lillian" She smiled as I lead her out the door.


	51. What you see isn't always what you get

**It's here, I changed things around a little to add in another chapter. Since I had many people disappointed I said there were only three Chapters left.  
The first half of the chapter is Rose's POV in the Bar Sorry It's a little repetative but I hadn't really covered Rose's POV**

**BTW~I still don't own anything.**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

RPOV

"Just remember, don't feed off him. Actually try not to expose any blood." Jasper reminded me for the hundredth time.

"She'll be fine." Alice smiled assuring me everything would go smoothly. Although I think at the moment Jasper was more concerned about his own reaction.

Out of nowhere Edward and Jasper began laughing. "Really Emmett?"

I glanced over at Emmett he looked confused, my gaze redirected to Edward.

"He's jealous." Jasper explained.

Emmett was quickly back at my side as he possessively placed his arms around me. Did he really think there was a need to be jealous? I leaned into him assuring him there was nothing to worry about, I mean seriously?

"Can we just get this over with?" I asked impatiently. I wanted nothing more to get out of this redneck town.

"Okay, I'll be in a few minutes after you, just in case." Bella assured me. Not like I couldn't handle myself but it was nice to know someone else was in there with me. I wish it could be Emmett but his size would be too noticeable. We didn't want him to recognize Jasper as the guy who attacked his wife, or Edward as the teen his wife made a move on, and Alice wanted to stay outside so there would be less distractions so she could see if anything was changing.

I kissed Emmett and smiled as I walked into the bar. Looking across the room I spotted Tim. I gracefully walked over towards him making sure I pressed my hips against his as I moved to sit on the bar stool I muttered excuse me paying no attention to him.

This caught his attention and I noticed him staring at me. Shit, does he recognize me? No, he's just being a creep. He was seriously checking out someone more than half his age. Well maybe not technically but he didn't know that.

"My names Tim." He introduced himself, Yeah, I know who the fuck you are, and I also know how your going to die. I simply ignored him as I felt his eyes continue to stare at my body.

I turned slightly towards the door as I heard Bella enter the bar, I winked over at her smiling, we all knew he wouldn't be hard to tempt.

I felt his finger gently tap my shoulder. I held back a shudder at the thought of this pig touching me. "I heard you Tim." I snapped.

His gaze was no longer on me and I was scared of loosing his attention.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be rude." I apologized as I turned my bar stool back towards him.

"Your not from around here?" He asked.

"No"

"So," He smiled flirtatiously "Do you have a name?"

"Yes." I answered keeping him guessing.

The bartender came over to get my drink order, shit, I hadn't had a drink well, ever, and honestly never paid attention to what humans were drinking. I searched my brain for a drink that would be appropriate to order.

"I'll have a sex on the beach." I smiled proud of myself, I heard the entire family laugh remembering Emmett trying to convince Bella while she was still human to try sex on the beach. Both the drink and the deed. I glanced over to Bella and smiled as she giggled.

"They're my favorite." I whispered seductively at Tim using the name of the drink to increase his arousal.

"So, do you have a boyfriend?"

"She has a fucking husband." I heard Emmett growl from the parking lot. My poor baby, I definitely owed him.

"Yes, but he's not here." I winked. "I'll kill him myself." Emmett growled.

I smiled at Emmett's reaction Tim took it as an invitation to invite me to some sleazy motel. Which was fine by me; there was no way things would get that far.

"I know a little place we can go to." He stood and reached for my hand as I let him lead me out into the parking lot.

"By the way, I never did get a name."

"Lillian." I smiled as we stepped out the door.

"So, Lillian." Tim smiled as he led me to his van.A minivan? No way in hell was I getting into that abomination. Those things should be outlawed.

"Tim?" I ran my fingers across his arm. "Do you mind if we take my car?"

"Ahh," He paused "Do you know your way around here?"

"I can learn, a good guide like you." I continued to let my fingers run up and down his arm. Like I would want to see anything around here. I'd rather die.

Not realizing exactly what I thought, I caught Edwards laugh at my thoughts. Okay well, I'd rather be doing pretty much anything but being shown this crappy hick town.

I turned and walked towards my car. I quickly realized I had no keys. "keys" I whispered so Tim wouldn't hear. Within seconds saw Emmett in the tree above me and smiled as he dropped the keys down to me. I caught them hoping Tim wouldn't notice. I was wrong.

"Where did those come from?" He asked getting suspicious.

"Where did what come from?" I asked as I placed my hand on his chest and let it travel down to his pants buckle. He moaned softly as I walked away and entered the car. God, men are complete idiots, controlled only by one thing. Again Edward laughed. That means you too Eddy.

"This is a fucking BMW!" Tim exclaimed as he checked out my baby.

"An M3" I explained as his jaw dropped.

"Are you sure you can handle it?" Tim asked as I sat in the drivers seat.

"Oh, sweetie, you'd be surprised what I can handle." Tim scoffed at this, of course he would think this way, damn male chauvinistic pig. To show him I slammed on the gas as I put the car into reverse. Shifting gears I listened to the tires squeal as I flew out of the parking lot. Tim's face was frozen.

"I made some adjustments, normal M3 goes 0-62 in 5.4, this baby goes 0-60 in 3.2." I explained.

"How? You do your own work?" Tim's voice was shaking. I was defiantly not what he was expecting.

"All of it." I smiled adding to his anxiety.

I glanced in my rearview mirror and noticed Emmett driving his Jeep behind me with Alice, Jasper, Edward and Bella, in tow.

"Is that what you do for a living?" He asked.

I was tempted to go along with that story. Make him suffer a little longer. But I was already disgusted by his scent in my car.

"I'm a professional student." I smiled at the little inside joke.

Tim looked even more confused. Maybe this would be worse.

"I don't understand."

"Well, you see, I've been in high school for the past seventy years, give or take a few years for my multiple honeymoons."

"Multiple honeymoons? How many times have you been married?" He sounded disgusted.

Leave it to a man not to care that I just said I was over ninety years old, he thought I was a slut. I looked over at him my eyes no where near the road. Reality finally set in as his face became overwhelmed with terror. I flipped on the parental control lock on the locks I never had a purpose for them but they were coming in handy now.

"Who are you?" His voice cracked as he began to tremble.

"Your children's guardian angel."

**I have a new story, 'Alternate Ending' It's what happens if Alice and Bella were too late to stop Edward from revealing himself in Italy. It's completely different than anything I've written before and very sad. Let me know what you think. Debating on whether or not to do another chapter.**


	52. Payback

**Okay, here's the next chapter. I keep trying to elaborate to give everyone more chapters. Hope you like it.  
And, Unfortunatly I still own nothing.**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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TPOV

I watched as Lillian reached her hand down and flipped the locks. What the hell was going on here. I started to process the information she told me, high school seventy years? Multiple honeymoons? How old did she say she was?

"Who are you?" I know my mouth was moving but I could barely hear the words I spoke.

"Your Children's guardian angel." She said with a harshness in her voice.

My kids? What the hell is happening here? Is she a friend of Kristi's? No, I would have defiantly remembered her, but I know I've seen her before.

"Do I know you?" I asked still barely able to speak.

She laughed. It was a cynical laugh that sent chills down my spine.

"Lets just say this is payback." She smiled as she looked at me I began become worried since she hadn't looked at the road in a few minutes.

Payback for what? I was too scared to ask. I just sat there trembling in my seat watching as she sped down the sharply curving road as we headed deeper into the Ocala National Forest.  
Her phone rang and I watched as she picked it up and flipped it on, not saying anything as she answered she listened for a moment before saying 'sure' and setting the phone back down as we continued to fly down the road before she suddenly made a sharp left turn sending the car flying onto a dirt road.

"Payback for what?" I whispered as I finally found the courage to speak.

"I thought you'd never ask." She grinned as she pulled the car to a stop and turned the ignition off. "You see Tim, I have a bit of a problem with men like you." She paused waiting to see if I had anything to say. I tried to argue, tell her she didn't know shit about me or my life, but every time I tired to open my mouth to speak the words would not come out.

"Are you wondering what type of man you are Tim? You are the type of man who does not appreciate what you have. Sure you put on a good charade for the church buddies, your coworkers think you love your family, but what are you going to do now that the truth has come out on national television?"

Wife Swap! That's how I know her, She's one of those Cullens. Damn, why didn't I realize it sooner. She the eldest with the husband that is probably gay. Her name's not Lillian, shit, why can't I remember her name?

"You're a Cullen, aren't you?" I exclaimed as I once again became overwhelmed with fear. My heart raced as I began pulling at the car door clawing at the door. "Look, I'm sorry, Please let me go."

"Oh, I'm nowhere near finished with you."

Suddenly I became very calm. I stopped pulling at the door, I no longer had the desire to get out of the car. I turned to face her and saw her looking at me with an evil smirk on her face.

"You should thank my brother Jasper for that." She explained as I became more confused. "I can't have you breaking my car. Not that I couldn't fix it but I don't feel like replacing the door handles. You see, my brother Jasper has the ability to play with peoples emotions. That's all he's doing now; playing. The fear will come back, but this time you won't try and break my baby."

What the hell? I should be scared right now but I did feel amazingly at peace right now.

"Now, can I please explain what type of bastard you are?" she asked.

All I could do was nod.

"Do you know there are people out there who would love to have the opportunity to have children, to experience pregnancy, to know you created something, gave something life? And here you are ready to kill your own children."

I was suddenly frightened again. As quickly as the fear left it returned. I stared into her cold eyes as she spoke, how did she know about my plan?

"You see Tim, I was left for dead by a man just like you. I lost my chance to have children, to be a parent, and I know without a doubt my husband would be a great father. But I lost all of that when I died."

When she died? She couldn't be dead. What was she talking about? "Dead?" I whispered.

"Don't worry though, I got revenge on them as I will with you tonight." She ignored my comment.

"How did you know?" I whispered too scared to look into those dark eyes again.

"That's one of the advantages of being a vampire." She said as she leaned over towards my seat bringing her mouth close to my neck. My heart rate increase and I felt a warm wetness around my crotch I was certain this was the end.

She threw her head back laughing. "Don't worry, I don't eat trash."

I let out a sigh of relief "Look, I'm sorry, I won't hurt my kids. Just please let me go."

"Oh, it's not just that Tim." She grinned exposing her teeth. I didn't see any fangs extended maybe she wasn't going to kill me.

"You see, Esme may not be my biological mother but she has been a mother to me for many years. The things you did to her brought back many bad memories for her. I've been fantasizing about this moment since Alice had the vision of you raising your hand to her."

I tried to put the pieces together. "You can see things?" I asked utterly confused.

"No, my sister Alice is a psychic. That's how she's been watching you. She saw you rape Theresa and she saw you murdering your family tonight. I honestly didn't know how much you hated your children until tonight when Edward heard you in the bar."

I must have looked as confused as I was because she continued to explain.

"Edward can read minds." She paused. "And you just keep adding to the list of reasons you should die. Like I said The only reason I originally wanted to kill you was for the things you did to Esme. Do you know how Esme died?" She asked becoming more enraged.

How the hell was I supposed to know. I never knew she even fucking died. I hung my head down as a chill went down my back realizing I hadn't been crazy, Esme had come into my bedroom that night.

"She jumped off a cliff. Off a fucking cliff because she lived with the abuse for all those years only to loose her only child after she finally got away. When you treated her like that it brought back all those memories. Your very lucky Esme has such restraint she didn't kill you then. I am also very lucky she didn't kill you then because I now have the pleasure of doing that job."

I sat looking at my hands as they trembled, my wet pants, too scared to move. From the corner of my eye I caught a flash of headlights in the mirror.

"Shit" I heard her mumble along with something unrecognizable as I watched the vehicle pull up behind us.

It was a Jeep. Forest rangers used Jeeps to get through the rough dirt roads. Maybe I would still get out of this. The Jeep stopped behind us and turned off it's lights. I saw the shadows of a large man hop out of the Jeep and walk towards the car.

**Thanks again to everyone who keeps pressuring me to write more to this story. I'm glad people like it.  
Okay. I promise that Tim dies in the next chapter!!**


	53. Tim's savior?

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Okay, I broke my promise at the end of the last chapter (Sorry Can't kill Tim off yet.)

Well anyway on with the story. Remember I don't own anything :(

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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EmPOV

I didn't like this at all. It had been okay while Jasper was with me, but I couldn't control my emotions every time I thought of Rosalie in the car with Tim. I was enraged by his attitude towards women, and kids, and well the guy pretty much hated everyone but himself. Not to mention I couldn't help but be jealous. I knew Rose loved me and detested Tim and this had to be done, but she was still my wife.

While Edward would have been the sensible one being the fasted Alice had sent Jasper to run ahead of Rose's car to try and find a place Rose could turn off to take care of Tim. I glanced in the rearview mirror to see Bella resting her head on Edwards chest as he ran his fingers through her hair while Alice sat patiently waiting for a vision of Jasper. I was surprised by how well Bella was taking all of this seeing she had never killed anyone, but we all knew deep down it was bothering her more than any of us. Of course Bella detested Tim but she was too compassionate like Carlisle to be as excited about this as the rest of us.

I turned my focus back to Rose's car ahead of me and watched Tim shaking in the passenger seat. Alice picked up her phone, I heard her dialing the numbers as she gave Rose instructions of where to go, not even moments later her car took a sharp left flying down the dirt road. I slowed and turned my lights off as Jasper jumped back into the passenger seat. I waited a minute before turning off onto the dirt road and parked a couple hundred feet behind them as we sat there quietly listening.

"He figured it out." Edward noted.

Seconds later we heard Tim. "You're a Cullen aren't you?"

I laughed as he pleaded for his life. He began clawing at the door handle, banging his fist into the window. I knew his human strength couldn't do much damage to the car but still, it was Rose's baby.

"I can't have you breaking my car." I heard Rose explain to Tim.

I glanced over at Jasper "Don't let him mess up the car."

Jasper nodded and began working on calming Tim.

I smiled as Rose asked him if her knew what kind of bastard he was. That's my girl, you tell him. I was expecting her to go off on him for the things he did to Esme. What she said next shocked me even more.

"Do you know there are people out there who would love to have the opportunity to have children, to experience pregnancy, to know you created something, gave something life? And here you are ready to kill your own children."

Although her voice was strong and angry I could hear the pain. I sat frozen as I listened to her words wishing I could give her those things she desired. Wishing she could have those experiences.

"You see Tim, I was left for dead by a man just like you. I lost my chance to have children, to be a parent, and I know without a doubt my husband would be a great father. But I lost all of that when I died."

I am man enough to admit that if I could cry right now, I would. I felt Bella's hand on my shoulder as she reassuringly patted it.

"I think you and Rose need to take some time away once this is all done." Edward said as we sat there listening to their conversation. We couldn't help but laugh

Suddenly I came up with an idea, I paused for a moment as I debated whether or not to say anything.

"Good idea." Edward laughed.

"It's a great idea." Alice giggled. "I see this being a whole lot more fun.""Don't you love being the last to know?" Bella said to Jasper.

"Most the time I don't want to know." Jasper laughed.

I started up the Jeep and turned on the lights. I couldn't help but laugh as I heard Rose mutter 'shit, what the fuck are you doing Em?' as I put the car into drive. Trust me babe. I thought as I stopped my Jeep behind her car.

"He's falling for it." Edward laughed as I got out of the car and started walking towards the passenger side of the car. It was so dark out there wasn't a chance his human eyes would be able to see me clearly enough to recognize me.

I tapped on the window and waited for Rosalie to roll down the window. "Are you guys okay?"

"Were fine." Rose sneered.

I held back my laughter as I looked into Tim's eyes pleading with me.

"Okay, Well, sorry to interrupt you too love birds." I cringed thinking of the thought of him with my Rosalie. Your car's just blocking the road, I got a place a quarter mile up the road."

"Umm maybe I could talk to you for a minute." Tim smiled up at me but couldn't hide the fear in his eyes.

"Tim sweetie, don't leave me in here all alone." Rose said placing her hand on his wrist. He screamed out in pain as I heard the bones in his wrist snap,

"Oh, man, are you okay?" I asked playing the concerned citizen.

"He's fine." Rose said sharply. "He likes it rough."

"Sir, are you really okay?" I asked again.

"I'm fine." he lied.

"Ma'am. Can I speak to him alone for a moment?" I asked sweetly. I knew Rose didn't know the new change in direction and thought I was using this opportunity to steal her thunder and kill Tim myself. I had no intention of doing that I just wanted to have a little more fun with him.

"Fine." She huffed as she unlocked the doors.

Tim scrambled out of the car crying as he cradled his broken wrist. He ran right up to me grabbing the collar of my shirt he tried to pull me down to him. I lowered my head as he whispered to me.

"She's fucking crazy!" He whispered frantically. "She broke my fucking hand."

"No, from the sound of it she broke seven of your eight carpals. That's technically your wrist." Edward explained as he appeared at my side. "I've been through medical school, would you like me to look at it?"

"Your more of them" Tim cried as he looked at Edward and I.

His heart rate sped up as he checked his surroundings, trying to find a way out. Rose quickly came to my side.

"Tim. I see you met my husband." She smiled placing her hand on my chest.

He couldn't say anything. Just stood there trembling.

"Guys" Bella came running up to us. "I thought we decided we were just going to have fun with him. Nobody said anything about hurting him."

"Oh, thank you." Tim mumbled under his breath.

"Just let him go." She pleaded with Edward and I.

Wrapping her arms around Edward she smiled and planted a kiss on his cheek. "Edward, please. Please don't do this. Just let him go." Edward groaned in protest as Bella continued "Please. You know you can't resist me, forget about him, we can go find a little spot in the woods and you can have your fun with me." She ran her hand down his chest stopping as she played with his belt buckle. Edward's hands traveled down her back in response.

"Ah?" I tried to get their attention.

"What the hell," Edward sighed "Just get out of here." He said to Tim as Rose and I stood there looking dumbstruck.

Without a moments hesitation Tim took off running down the road.

"Bella, I think that deserves an Oscar." I laughed as we followed him traveling along the tree tops ready to make our next move.


	54. Killing Tim

**Okay the Chapter everyone has been waiting for. Who kills Tim? (Read and find out) :)  
A special thanks to WeLoveTwilight212 and Mo for a few of the review suggestions that I decided to use.  
Thanks to everyone who has reviewed. It's given me some idea's and motivation to add a few more chapters before we get to the sequel  
Again, I don't own anything :(**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

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TPOV

It was that easy? Were they really letting me go? I didn't stop to ask questions. Didn't hesitate for a moment as I took off running down the dirt road. I didn't hear their cars leave, actually I didn't hear anything but the sound of my feet hitting the dirt. I debated whether or not to look back. Were they still standing there watching me? I didn't hear them chasing me but I didn't want to risk seeing those eyes again. I was beginning to become out of breath I could hear my heart beating rapidly; I knew I couldn't keep running much longer. Ahead of me I could see where the road curved to the right. They wouldn't be able to see me from there, I could stop and catch my breath.

I stepped to the side of the road, into the scrub and crouched down hiding my body. Once I was able to stop trembling and catch my breath I took my shirt off and tried to wrap it around my wrist as a splint. The pain was unbearable and I couldn't help but curse Theresa for wanting to be on Wife Swap in the first place. I needed to come up with a plan a way out of here. From the looks of it the only way was to continue to follow the dirt road; I took a deep breath as I stepped back onto the road.

"Going somewhere?" A tiny dark haired girl gracefully dropped down from the tree above me. Damn it, she was one of them, what was her name again?

"What's wrong Tim? Were you too busy beating Theresa to pay attention to our names?" As if reading my mind Edwards voice came from behind me. Of course I had remembered his name, he had been the one that got me angry with Theresa in the first place. Hitting on a damn teenager.

"My name's Alice." The small one smiled. "I'm the one who had to watch you murder your wife and children."

"My name's Jasper." Another one said as he appeared almost out of nowhere at Alice's side. He smiled and I immediately became terrified. I stumbled backwards falling on my broken wrist. I let out a scream of agony from the pain; I looked up to see Rosalie and Emmett looking down over me.

"You're all…" I stopped, consumed in panic I couldn't say the words.

"Vampires?" The brunette that had been with Edward, Bella I think, smiled as she leaped down from the tree branch and stood next to Edward.

I glanced around quickly my eyes darting to each of them as they encircled me; their bright white teeth and cold dark eyes staring down at me.

"You know you should be happy." Jasper smiled. I wish he would use his ability to calm me. Even a false sense of security would appease me right now. Why should I be happy? Were they going to let me go?

"Oh no, nothing like that." Edward threw his hair back and chuckled.

"No Tim." Jasper explained. "You should be happy my Alice is a good person. You see we were just going to leave you hanging from a tree. Make it as if you killed yourself. Show you for the coward you are."

"What changed your mind?" I asked my voice shaking as I spoke for the first time since I left Rosalie's car.

"Well you see there's this little thing called life insurance." Alice smiled as she stepped in closer to me.

"They won't pay the beneficiary if it's suicide." Rosalie added also stepping closer in to me Emmett moving right along at her side.

"And as much as I detested your wife while she was living with us I think your children deserve a better life." Bella said as she stepped closer to me.

Stupid Bitch, I thought she was actually going to help me back by the cars.

"What did you just call her?" Edward snarled.

Oh, shit the mind reader. I remembered, I saw a smile form on his face as I remembered his talent. "Sorry." I whispered glancing over at Bella.

"Hey, I have an idea." I turned to the direction of Emmett's voice.

"Oh, good idea." Alice giggled.

Edward growled as he pulled Bella closer in to him.

"Oh, come on Edward." Alice pleaded. "What about Rose?" Edward asked.

"What do you mean what about Rose?" Rose asked confused.

"Don't worry about it babe, it's a good idea."

"No it isn't." Edward protested.

"Oh, come on Bella…""Bella what?" Bella interrupted. My head was spinning back and forth between them maybe they would stand here and bicker long enough they would forget about me. Edward cocked his head back and laughed at this thought and then put his mouth to Bella's ear. I assumed he was whispering something to her but his lips barely moved and I couldn't hear a single word he spoke.

"Really?" Bella smiled down at me glancing over at Rosalie I saw her lips barely move turning quickly to Rosalie I saw her nod in approval.

What the hell was happening?

"Well, Tim." Edward began to explain. "Bella's new to the family."

"Yeah, she's our little murder virgin." Emmett interrupted as the entire group broke out in laughter.

"Bella a virgin?" Alice laughed. "I think we all know that's not true how do we explain Nessie?"

Nessie? The little brat that drove Theresa crazy? Edward growled at my thoughts and quickly explained to Bella what I thought of their daughter.

"Well she is sort of a virgin in that sense." Emmett laughed.

"Go ahead love," Edward said releasing his arms from her waist.

I tried to back away from her pushing myself back with my feet I felt myself bump into Emmett's legs. Trying to stand I put pressure on my broken wrist and immediately fell back down my face smashing into the clay dirt.

"It's okay Tim. I promise I'll make it quick." Bella said picking me up by my head I felt my hair being pulled out as she lifted me up. I tried kicking my legs and found it useless. With one swift movement she pulled my head back and I felt it snap before I was surrounded by complete blackness.

JPOV

I took a few steps back as I watched Bella grab Tim. Watched as our sweet innocent Bella snapped Tim's neck. I was thankful she merely snapped his neck scared of what may happen if she exposed any of his blood. I would not be able to face Carlisle if I fed off of Tim whether he was dead or not, I was not going to fall back off that wagon.

I watched as Bella stood there looking at Tim's dead body. Her emotions were scattered; I calmed her down as she turned to Edwards arms.

"We'll get this cleaned up." I said to Edward as I watched the two of them take off through the woods.

"Hey guys, Will you excuse Emmett and I?" Rosalie asked. Sure, we'll clean up your mess so you can go have sex in the trees with your husband I thought. But I didn't feel any lustful emotions from either of them. I gave her a quizzical look as she continued to explain. "I have some thing I want to take care of." Rose explained.

"Go." Alice smiled. I'm sure she saw what it was but I honestly didn't want to ask right now. I watched Rose and Emmett take off in the opposite direction. "So what are we going to do with him?" I asked as Alice and I looked down at Tim's body.

* * *


	55. The end?

**Drum Roll Please....It's here, the final chapter *Tear*  
BTW, In case you haven't realized in the first 54 chapters: I own nothing.  
There is a longer Authors Note at the end of the story (Please Read) but for now, on with the story**

**~Read~Review~Enjoy~**

* * *

EPOV

I stood in horror as I watched my sweet Bella snap Tim's neck wishing now more than ever I could hear her thoughts. I watched as she dropped his lifeless body to the ground. Looking over at me she smiled; but her eyes betrayed her. For the first time in all of our years together my entire family was silent. Nobody knew what to say.

_Her emotions are scattered. _Jasper looked at me, I nodded and felt a rush of calm was over all of us. I stretched my arms out to her and wrapped them around her as she sunk into my chest.

"We'll get this cleaned up." Jasper sensing Bella's emotions excused us and I couldn't have been more grateful. _I think she'll be fine._

I took Bella's hand as we ran into the woods. We ran till we were about thirty miles from the rest of the family. The entire time I prayed she'd release her shield and allow me entry into her mind, no such luck. The nights earlier events replaying in my mind. No, I still didn't think Bella was a monster, but I couldn't help but feel it was my fault. My fault for changing her, giving this type of life. Coming to a riverbank I came to a stop, sitting down I pulled her down to my lap.

"What are you thinking?" I asked as I ran my fingers through her hair.

"I'm fine." Bella tried to assure me. "Really." She looked up at me and smiled.

"Please, love, What are you really thinking?"

"I'm wondering how badly your beating yourself up over this." That was my Bella, always shocking me. I didn't say anything, just smiled at her, pretending I didn't know what she was talking about.

"Oh come on Edward," she chuckled turning herself to face me she wrapped her arms around me. "Do you think I don't know you?"

I couldn't help but smile as she brought her lips to mine.

She leaned into me pushing me back against the cool dirt, "Can we just get back to normal?" she sighed as she began to unbutton my shirt.

Normal? Did that exist in this family? I laughed at her question and shook my head.

"No?" She questioned me.

"Don't you think Emmett came out of this whole thing a little too easily."

"Oh." She smiled mischievously. "Do explain."

RPOV

I ran through the forest Emmett right behind me. I hadn't told him where we were going and after we were a good distance from Alice and Jasper he called out to me.

"Are you angry?" He asked quietly as I slowed pace. It hadn't occurred to me he didn't understand my motives. He thought I was angry with Bella, jealous she was the one to kill Tim. I was anything but; I had to give Bella major credit, I never imagined her doing anything like that. I wondered how Edward was taking things, knowing him he was probably him that was sulking.

"We need to hurry." I said as we picked up pace. I wasn't a tracker, and I was following a scent I hadn't smelt in a few months. I didn't expect it to be this hard and I wanted to get there before daylight.

"We're going to Theresa's, aren't we?" Emmett asked.

"I'm going to Theresa's. Where the hell are you going?" I watched as he veered off to the right.

"Your heading in the wrong direction."

What the hell? How would he know? I glanced over at him conveying my confusion.

"Well, we may have to backtrack a little but I was following Tim's scent, where he's been."Shit, why didn't I think of that. I laughed, Emmett actually came up with a great idea. Actually he surprised me the past few months how he handled things while Theresa was there, minus the car incident he actually made our lives much easier.

We did have to do a lot of backtracking but we eventually found Theresa's house. Sitting in one of the tree's I looked through the window. I smiled as I watched Jenny and Noah sleeping in their beds thankful these children would never fully know the monster their father was. I felt Emmett's large arms embrace me as we sat there silently looking at the one thing we would never have.

Moving over to the next window I glanced in on Kristi. The girl was my age, physically, and with a little work she wouldn't be bad for a human. I couldn't help but be envious of her, in a few years she would be getting married and probably raising a family. I sighed realizing I would give up every ounce of my beauty to be her.

Across the house Sean sat with his head resting on his desk pen dangling out of his fingers, his desk lamp shining down on him.

"Poor kid." Emmett whispered to me.

"I know, they only get to be teens once." I made a mental note to remind Theresa of this. "Let them have some fun."

"Imagine if we only had seven years as a teenager." Emmett said taking my hand in his. Looking at it that way I was grateful for the fact that I was immortal. All the things Emmett and I had done over the past seventy-five years, all the things I would have missed out on if I were alive.

"Thank you." I smiled as he kissed my hand. "Let's get this over with."

Emmett remained outside as I quietly slipped into Theresa's bedroom. Kneeling down next to her bed I quietly woke her. Quickly placing my hand over her mouth I motioned for her to be quiet as she tried to scream.

"I'm not going to hurt you." I assured her. "But you need to be quiet." She nodded as I continued to explain.

"I am going to tell you something, and you will not repeat it." overwhelmed with fear she continued to nod. "I did you a favor tonight, rid you of that worthless piece of shit husband of yours since you were too much of a coward to do it yourself." She shot up out of the bed startling me for a moment I stepped back I gasped as she jumped out of bed and threw her arms around me. This was not the reaction I expected, Emmett was quickly at the window to check on me, as if I couldn't hold my own with this human.

"If you do repeat this everyone is going to think your crazy." I sneered to make sure she never told anyone of our little visit. I was right though, no one would ever believe her.

Noticing Emmett in the room she quickly stepped back again, her eyes not wavering from him as she pushed herself against the wall.

"Theresa, I'm not going to hurt you either. I just want you to know why we took care of Tim." Emmett explained for me, knowing that I couldn't bear to tell my story again. I watched her expressions as he told her my story, the things that were done to me, and how I was immortally frozen at eighteen.

"Don't take them for granted." Emmett sighed as I saw something in his face I had never noticed, deep down he shared my desire to have a child. Walking over to him I smiled as we turned back to the window.

"What are you?" Theresa asked as to confirm her suspicion.

"Take those kids on a vacation with the insurance money. Let them have some fun, be kids." Emmett laughed ignoring her question as we leapt out of the window.

* * *

  
**Millions of Thanks again to everyone for reading the story. When I started it I never imagined that it would get this type of response.  
I realize I sort of went OOC on Bella and Rose in the last two chapters but thought it would give the story an interesting spin. Hopefully you liked the change in character.  
Hopefully the sequel will be up in a day or two. There are still a lot of things left to deal with, such as how will Carlisle and Esme react, Will Nessie find out? What happens to Theresa and the kids? And most importantly what's Edwards plan for revenge?  
Add me to your Author Alerts or check back to my profile in a day or two for the sequel.  
Feel free to browse around my other stories as well.  
Thanks again.  
**


	56. UPDATE!

***~*Just an update*~***

**(Yes I'm being that Bitch again, posting Authors notes. But technically the story's over so that gets me off the hook right? ;)**

**The sequel is finally up!**

**I also wanted to share some stats with you to let you know how wonderful everyone has been reading and reviewing Cullen Wife Swap.**

**~As of 7-23-09~**

**Hits: 77,122  
Favorites: 236  
Alerts:236  
Reviews: 880**

**I would also like to say a special thanks to FayeMcCullen, I gained a new little virtual sis while writing this. I never expected to meet such great people writing on the site. **

**Okay, I'll let you get on to the sequel, it's titled 'Payback's a Bitch'**

**Thanks so much!!**


	57. Please Read!

**I'm Being that Bitch again posting damn author notes lol...**

**Just wanted to announce that Cullen Wife Swap has been entered in the Sparkle and Shine Awards.  
And a thank you to whoever nominated it!!**

**I had so much fun writing this and never expected anything like this but since I had such great readers I'd love it if you went on over and voted.  
Also please check out the competition (Bedtime Stories and Bubblegum pop were also really good) I've been trying to read all of them, some longer than others and taking me a while but I think it's only fair to know what else is out there.  
But remember who to vote for...:-) **

**The website is thesparkleawards(dot)webs(dot)com  
It's located in the Nessie Awards-Best Post BD story.**

**And to those of you waiting for the next chapter of Payback, It's coming!!  
I have been sick the past few days, add that in with the fact that I don't really want to or no how to end the story it's taken me a little longer to finish. Right now it's two thirds of the way completed.**

**Also working on a few outtakes if you have any suggestions please let me know!**

**Thanks again!!**

**Jennie  
**


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